Jackie André was on her way home from Paris after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling sober now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Volkswagen Passat, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only three drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Texas, etc. etc. "You're a Fool for Training Me" by The Shrugs was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her earlobe began to creak and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing chartreuse light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge spongy flowerpot floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the circus tent across the road, then heavily descended to the ground.
Jackie was feeling strangely queer. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in physics class. Her earlobe was still creaking, but she got out of the Volkswagen Passat and scooted timidly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a heavyset creature emerged. It was camouflage-ish in color and looked like a cross between a gnu and a Kindle. It had four beige eyes in its vein. "Jigoogiloo flybenoojod ajelooj, tucepan loo loowhitoo, mocybud sawhuk," the creature said.
"Thanks for nothing," Jackie said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"See rock shovel twig strainer calculate to neighborhood," the thing sighed.
"Yippee. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Gujegaje Band-aid grudoodymot."
"Why don't you take your Band-aid and shove it in your bladder?" Jackie retorted.
The creature looked disorganized. "Bujesabu tratoonoocud ilynem, cifuboom," it added. "Cyslewooj!" it continued.
"Your face is a cyslewooj!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, noble creature; she was feeling unusually humble. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or computer geek. If she had been carrying a flask, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Milano will be delighted to see you."
The creature staggered slightly and flinched. Then it rose up on its charming legs, puffed out its horn and tore admiringly toward her.
For the first time, Jackie had the urge to run, but her neck was turning blue and her legs refused to move.
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