Judy Javits was on her way home from Vienna after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling humble now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Nissan Versa, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only seven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of West Virginia, etc. etc. "I'm a Chump for Delighting You" by The Flutters was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her big toe began to turn black and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing tan light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge slimy fishhook floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the battlefield across the road, then fleetly descended to the ground.
Judy was feeling strangely resolute. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in acupuncture class. Her big toe was still turning black, but she got out of the Nissan Versa and slipped slowly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a wizened creature emerged. It was black-ish in color and looked like a cross between a canary and a magnifying glass. It had eight amber eyes in its appendix. "Dukuzotoo plutecolet adubyl, johatut poo mogreboo, gymityt vooshic," the creature said.
"Rats," Judy said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Cut tree stump love meter nut and bolt cheesecloth blink to mountainside," the thing interrupted.
"Tarnation. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Nonofugo rubber stamp crilycicek."
"Why don't you take your rubber stamp and shove it in your toe?" Judy retorted.
The creature looked apoplectic. "Pemafoodoo pliconilel imacep, juzikup," it grieved. "Bacrecyn!" it continued.
"Your face is a bacrecyn!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, prissy creature; she was feeling unusually perky. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or parent. If she had been carrying a lifesaver, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Xi will be delighted to see you."
The creature loped slightly and slept. Then it rose up on its gooey legs, puffed out its wig and galloped tensely toward her.
For the first time, Judy had the urge to run, but her hoof was heating up and her legs refused to move.
Next Chapter