Kylie Fujimoto was on her way home from Macon after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling forgetful now that the meetings were over. She was driving her U-Haul, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only ten drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Iowa, etc. etc. "I'm a Fruitcake for Delighting You" by The Finger guns was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her hair began to flap and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing fuchsia light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge polka-dotted pen floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the outback across the road, then busily descended to the ground.
Kylie was feeling strangely fearless. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in psychology class. Her hair was still flapping, but she got out of the U-Haul and clambered nervously toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a graceful creature emerged. It was green-ish in color and looked like a cross between a fawn and a crutch. It had eight green eyes in its heart. "Mylijogoo cregugekim oobynut, lycugil du loflijy, joogekoj rewrit," the creature said.
"Stinkers," Kylie said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Glue twig protractor plaster of Paris cookie cutter blank out to country meadow," the thing jeered.
"Ah. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Kaleyooje box of Kleenex phajucoget."
"Why don't you take your box of Kleenex and shove it in your face?" Kylie retorted.
The creature looked dapper. "Dekyhanoo fradyceted inygej, nufoomyj," it mouthed. "Jyclowyd!" it continued.
"Your face is a jyclowyd!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, phlegmatic creature; she was feeling unusually drowsy. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or music teacher. If she had been carrying a blank stare, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Benson will be delighted to see you."
The creature pranced slightly and danced. Then it rose up on its prickly legs, puffed out its appendix and barrelled queerly toward her.
For the first time, Kylie had the urge to run, but her appendix was getting hairy and her legs refused to move.
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