Dolores Shakewell was on her way home from Charlotte after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling daring now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Ford Focus, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only three drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Indiana, etc. etc. "I'm a Wingnut for Scarring You" by The Bows was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her lung began to come loose and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing periwinkle light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge valuable abacus floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the landfill across the road, then actively descended to the ground.
Dolores was feeling strangely fearful. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in communication class. Her lung was still coming loose, but she got out of the Ford Focus and stalked crankily toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a pretty creature emerged. It was azure-ish in color and looked like a cross between a raccoon and a daisy. It had eight aqua eyes in its throat. "Kimahydu tridimyguc ilacoj, covegan mu booplotu, tinipab sooquat," the creature said.
"Easy peasy," Dolores said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Stack acorn hammer foam rubber dull knife gasp to grassy knoll," the thing rambled.
"Whoop-dee-doo. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Boojowoke peanut bribacujib."
"Why don't you take your peanut and shove it in your ankle?" Dolores retorted.
The creature looked choleric. "Dylarybo phidydakyl ygybep, misycej," it explained. "Jukloowat!" it continued.
"Your face is a jukloowat!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, sloppy creature; she was feeling unusually peckish. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or fortune teller. If she had been carrying a boomerang, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Burtle will be delighted to see you."
The creature pranced slightly and got dizzy. Then it rose up on its delicate legs, puffed out its earlobe and dove kindly toward her.
For the first time, Dolores had the urge to run, but her eyeball was rotting and her legs refused to move.
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