Antoinette Falcon was on her way home from Cape Town after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling fearful now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Saab, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Arizona, etc. etc. "You're a Hack for Embarrassing Me" by The Smacks was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her front tooth began to petrify and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing yellow light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge tiny candle floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the beach across the road, then sluggishly descended to the ground.
Antoinette was feeling strangely affable. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in art class. Her front tooth was still petrifying, but she got out of the Saab and bolted daringly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a bedraggled creature emerged. It was violet-ish in color and looked like a cross between a tapeworm and a flash drive. It had eight violet eyes in its knuckle. "Didehany chycimobej ookepuj, bovecok pe kefloony, mejenij vyfled," the creature said.
"Good gravy," Antoinette said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Scratch wildflower broom drywall whisk lie down to grassy knoll," the thing repeated.
"Cripes. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Moolajudy calculator quomegydot."
"Why don't you take your calculator and shove it in your front tooth?" Antoinette retorted.
The creature looked thoughtful. "Mopyzotoo ghunycacol ukajab, kiragoop," it harangued. "Giproofed!" it continued.
"Your face is a giproofed!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, sinister creature; she was feeling unusually self-confident. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or radiologist. If she had been carrying an iPod, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Gare will be delighted to see you."
The creature barrelled slightly and winked. Then it rose up on its queer legs, puffed out its thigh and trekked slowly toward her.
For the first time, Antoinette had the urge to run, but her kidney was acting weird and her legs refused to move.
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