Anita Tubman was on her way home from Charlotte after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling carefree now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Ford Bronco, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Wisconsin, etc. etc. "I'm a Chump for Ostracizing You" by The Laughs was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her tongue began to get stiff and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing aqua light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge rough knitting needle floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the gulch across the road, then like a bat out of hell descended to the ground.
Anita was feeling strangely cruel. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in French class. Her tongue was still getting stiff, but she got out of the Ford Bronco and sidled nervously toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a gorgeous creature emerged. It was red-ish in color and looked like a cross between a dinosaur and a saddle. It had two brilliant orange eyes in its hip. "Kebuzyce shootoomanoog oopoomoc, muwynac ca mewrooly, mimoomup hetryj," the creature said.
"Fribblenootums," Anita said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Cook badger hole sickle axle grease Sham-Wow! applaud to backyard," the thing spouted.
"Well I'll be. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Cakizaty hair dryer plekyjokyb."
"Why don't you take your hair dryer and shove it in your pinky?" Anita retorted.
The creature looked timid. "Bebicole wroomimedod ocoobek, jeriloj," it worried. "Padruzyg!" it continued.
"Your face is a padruzyg!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, unruffled creature; she was feeling unusually suave. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or organist. If she had been carrying a brick, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Marx will be delighted to see you."
The creature scampered slightly and chanted. Then it rose up on its worn legs, puffed out its abdomen and marched oddly toward her.
For the first time, Anita had the urge to run, but her adrenal gland was getting scaly and her legs refused to move.
Next Chapter