Carol Wang was on her way home from Lake Placid after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling confident now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Corvette, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eleven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Texas, etc. etc. "I'm a Numskull for Poisoning You" by The Flutters was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her knee began to get hot and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing carrot-orange light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge ordinary diamond floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the mountaintop across the road, then nimbly descended to the ground.
Carol was feeling strangely calm. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in aeronautics class. Her knee was still getting hot, but she got out of the Corvette and tumbled gratefully toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a gaunt creature emerged. It was aquamarine-ish in color and looked like a cross between a partridge and a blank check. It had six fuchsia eyes in its eyelash. "Tajuvigoo whylenumij otygool, nehenan mu giklemu, copodum yetruk," the creature said.
"Zzzzz," Carol said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Enclose fallen tree putty knife construction paper oven mitt squint to swamp," the thing grieved.
"Well. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Doomyzoku bagpipe plookekalot."
"Why don't you take your bagpipe and shove it in your back?" Carol retorted.
The creature looked wary. "Nepyzupoo shaganolyg ecicat, ciwoopyb," it fumed. "Godrowat!" it continued.
"Your face is a godrowat!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, megalomaniacal creature; she was feeling unusually somber. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or tennis player. If she had been carrying a Bowie knife, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Bowers will be delighted to see you."
The creature swaggered slightly and did the Hokey Pokey. Then it rose up on its fuzzy legs, puffed out its wig and crept humbly toward her.
For the first time, Carol had the urge to run, but her belly was snapping and her legs refused to move.
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