Camella Goldfarb was on her way home from Santa Fe after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling stubborn now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Chevy Volt, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Utah, etc. etc. "You're a Boor for Pushing Me" by The Chortles was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her knee began to slide and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing magenta light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge new banana floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the cornfield across the road, then at a dawdle descended to the ground.
Camella was feeling strangely distressed. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in horticulture class. Her knee was still sliding, but she got out of the Chevy Volt and slipped briskly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a frumpy creature emerged. It was sparkly-ish in color and looked like a cross between a puppy and a can of beans. It had five aquamarine eyes in its elbow. "Deburuny drugootymel oojabot, pegykud du doplapoo, cetojaj yooglob," the creature said.
"Never," Camella said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Bless twig pipe wrench Scotch tape electric paint mixer adjust the clock to neighborhood," the thing smirked.
"Rooster feathers. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Jutijuli rose drutikomun."
"Why don't you take your rose and shove it in your wig?" Camella retorted.
The creature looked weary. "Kujajedi quootagodyb olamed, tosycip," it alleged. "Kophoorik!" it continued.
"Your face is a kophoorik!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, fiendish creature; she was feeling unusually resolute. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or entrepeneur. If she had been carrying a magic spell, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Ping will be delighted to see you."
The creature sped slightly and calculated. Then it rose up on its damp legs, puffed out its aorta and set out unexpectedly toward her.
For the first time, Camella had the urge to run, but her kneecap was going crazy and her legs refused to move.
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