Seema Judd was on her way home from Lisbon after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling queer now that the meetings were over. She was driving her cab, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Wyoming, etc. etc. "I'm a Dip for Castigating You" by The Growls was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her thyroid gland began to ache and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing violet light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge original dog collar floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the stream across the road, then double-time descended to the ground.
Seema was feeling strangely resolute. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in neurobiology class. Her thyroid gland was still aching, but she got out of the cab and trotted lazily toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a dinky creature emerged. It was black-ish in color and looked like a cross between a polar bear and a biscuit. It had seven sea green eyes in its eye. "Niboohula kroopijecal ymynooc, tygejod poo cikrike, kookotil zoofruk," the creature said.
"Crap," Seema said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Monitor stick sledgehammer chocolate ladle slobber to circus tent," the thing moaned.
"Roger. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pigoohilu hand puppet kroojokookog."
"Why don't you take your hand puppet and shove it in your liver?" Seema retorted.
The creature looked passionate. "Noonoofetu quujukupad ookoobed, nyzoonol," it reacted. "Gefruhool!" it continued.
"Your face is a gefruhool!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, ambitious creature; she was feeling unusually sober. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or machinist. If she had been carrying a shiv, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Countryman will be delighted to see you."
The creature sashayed slightly and shivered. Then it rose up on its cardboard legs, puffed out its kneecap and zipped rapidly toward her.
For the first time, Seema had the urge to run, but her eyelash was hissing and her legs refused to move.
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