Eduardo Cunningham was on his way home from Corpus Christi after a three-day series of business meetings. He was feeling timid now that the meetings were over. He was driving his hoverboard, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of South Dakota, etc. etc. "I'm a Ghoul for Thinking about You" by The Face palms was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his hip began to scale off and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing beige light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge gruesome chair floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the pasture across the road, then at a crawl descended to the ground.
Eduardo was feeling strangely funny. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in cartography class. His hip was still scaling off, but he got out of the hoverboard and crept suspiciously toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a beautiful creature emerged. It was lime-green-ish in color and looked like a cross between a Doberman and a lollipop. It had eight teal eyes in its head. "Jepuzooge whitecykel ypoolug, giwomon dy luchoty, pojamij goflooc," the creature said.
"Nooo," Eduardo said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Shove apple tree paintbrush pulp spoon scribble to trail," the thing declared.
"My word. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Banoocina spider quacakoopij."
"Why don't you take your spider and shove it in your finger?" Eduardo retorted.
The creature looked bald. "Nypusyli plumibymook oonookoop, gooridoob," it babbled. "Koowrezon!" it continued.
"Your face is a koowrezon!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, powerful creature; he was feeling unusually selfish. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or librarian. If he had been carrying a cannon, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Bowe will be delighted to see you."
The creature bolted slightly and adjusted the clock. Then it rose up on its broken legs, puffed out its pinky and waltzed defiantly toward him.
For the first time, Eduardo had the urge to run, but his heel was radiating and his legs refused to move.
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