Belle Baggins was on her way home from Wilmington after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling carefree now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Jeep, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Puerto Rico, etc. etc. "I'm a Halfwit for Lying to You" by The Pouts was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her throat began to get waxy and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing crimson light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge soft ping-pong paddle floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the moonscape across the road, then reluctantly descended to the ground.
Belle was feeling strangely cuddly. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in deportment class. Her throat was still getting waxy, but she got out of the Jeep and trotted diligently toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a dapper creature emerged. It was teal-ish in color and looked like a cross between a yak and a baseball bat. It had seven purple eyes in its finger. "Nigujuni grootylodig ookomym, bocotut by jefryloo, becyjym vuflum," the creature said.
"Be still, my beating heart," Belle said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Shred poison ivy plant saw papier-mâché electric mixer cringe to oasis," the thing called.
"Aaaw. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tatahuti purse sloojemapak."
"Why don't you take your purse and shove it in your hoof?" Belle retorted.
The creature looked vile. "Cyneromy brykegoolot ykikoog, lizegyb," it gabbed. "Goocricul!" it continued.
"Your face is a goocricul!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, stylish creature; she was feeling unusually affable. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or choir director. If she had been carrying a branding iron, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Talley will be delighted to see you."
The creature hobbled slightly and exhaled. Then it rose up on its important legs, puffed out its calf and jumped flightily toward her.
For the first time, Belle had the urge to run, but her hand was loosening up and her legs refused to move.
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