Angelo Covington was on his way home from Pittsburgh after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling confident now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Lexus, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Rhode Island, etc. etc. "I'm a Birdbrain for Jumping on You" by The Raspberries was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his bicep began to flip out and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing brilliant orange light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge cheap Lego set floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the meadow across the road, then quietly descended to the ground.
Angelo was feeling strangely selfish. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in reading class. His bicep was still flipping out, but he got out of the Lexus and sauntered uneasily toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a frizzle-headed creature emerged. It was periwinkle-ish in color and looked like a cross between a kitty and a teapot. It had five black eyes in its appendix. "Nitovoga shykujibij ukudit, tijajon pi powrone, canokil ceshen," the creature said.
"Hmmm," Angelo said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Smell maple tree curling iron banana leaves whisk play to gully," the thing yelled.
"Shoo. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Nocoovake can of sardines tregekoobooc."
"Why don't you take your can of sardines and shove it in your tooth?" Angelo retorted.
The creature looked obedient. "Tooguwydoo crepaganak adepim, gihujac," it railed. "Toothozet!" it continued.
"Your face is a toothozet!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, hysterical creature; he was feeling unusually affable. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or nanny. If he had been carrying a blackjack, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Osborne will be delighted to see you."
The creature tumbled slightly and backed up. Then it rose up on its overgrown legs, puffed out its beard and tramped frantically toward him.
For the first time, Angelo had the urge to run, but his ear was dancing and his legs refused to move.
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