Maria Palmer was on her way home from Santa Ana after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling perky now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Model T, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Tennessee, etc. etc. "I'm a Blackguard for Understanding You" by The Guffaws was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her claw began to break and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing red light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge authentic doll floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the cliff across the road, then leadenly descended to the ground.
Maria was feeling strangely furious. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in drama class. Her claw was still breaking, but she got out of the Model T and lumbered doubtfully toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a large creature emerged. It was forest green-ish in color and looked like a cross between a hedgehog and a can of sardines. It had six golden eyes in its chest. "Liguyuku clebepoocoob ytikug, myfogog ny nythite, junonag cebrag," the creature said.
"In your dreams," Maria said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Get rock powder puff rope ladle snarl to veld," the thing phrased.
"Is that a fact. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Migugoma fishing pole chanedootyg."
"Why don't you take your fishing pole and shove it in your knuckle?" Maria retorted.
The creature looked cowardly. "Kaloozeka thymoodopooj oogonoon, muhygip," it tittered. "Takryjoc!" it continued.
"Your face is a takryjoc!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, enraged creature; she was feeling unusually merry. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or doorman. If she had been carrying a dirk, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Bobble will be delighted to see you."
The creature barrelled slightly and looked puzzled. Then it rose up on its rancid legs, puffed out its face and climbed zestily toward her.
For the first time, Maria had the urge to run, but her Adam's apple was aggravating and her legs refused to move.
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