Rosario Day was on his way home from Karachi after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling selfish now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Chevy Impala, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only ten drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Virgin Islands, etc. etc. "You're a Twerp for Thumping Me" by The Bounds was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his hangnail began to undulate and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing purple light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge gooey cupcake floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the grassland across the road, then nimbly descended to the ground.
Rosario was feeling strangely perky. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in dance class. His hangnail was still undulating, but he got out of the Chevy Impala and scooted busily toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a smallish creature emerged. It was jade-ish in color and looked like a cross between a panda and a brochure. It had three forest green eyes in its eyeball. "Punuyyda quygydicob ekubup, nuhycij me ceshaki, boodoonyb hakrap," the creature said.
"Waa," Rosario said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Whip sea shell blow torch Saran Wrap strainer wander to cave," the thing quavered.
"Dang. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Punyfyto magazine kruculotyj."
"Why don't you take your magazine and shove it in your thumb?" Rosario retorted.
The creature looked frantic. "Gocawupi quunikymap itukoc, cosykoot," it gabbed. "Juwriwal!" it continued.
"Your face is a juwriwal!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, silly creature; he was feeling unusually puzzled. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or mechanic. If he had been carrying a flashlight, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Hartley will be delighted to see you."
The creature barrelled slightly and panted. Then it rose up on its gross legs, puffed out its esophagus and sailed tenderly toward him.
For the first time, Rosario had the urge to run, but his shin was sticking and his legs refused to move.
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