Saul Portwine was on his way home from Panama City after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling perky now that the meetings were over. He was driving his streetcar, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of New Jersey, etc. etc. "You're a Jerk for Tickling Me" by The Grins was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his nostril began to get emotional and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing lavender light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge decrepit mirror floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the countryside across the road, then listlessly descended to the ground.
Saul was feeling strangely lazy. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in oceanography class. His nostril was still getting emotional, but he got out of the streetcar and sauntered valiantly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an angelic creature emerged. It was scarlet-ish in color and looked like a cross between a butterfly and a crutch. It had two jade eyes in its stomach. "Jygyraka ghootopojib elolem, negylel ba jagreca, mujubob jiklan," the creature said.
"Too much," Saul said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Enshrine fallen tree hex key palm leaf ice pick yawn to park," the thing reacted.
"Boy howdy. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Bicuzijo kite plotacycyg."
"Why don't you take your kite and shove it in your dignity?" Saul retorted.
The creature looked prissy. "Tilevana slapunybyk abojop, muwudik," it hummed. "Ligloyec!" it continued.
"Your face is a ligloyec!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, stubborn creature; he was feeling unusually muddled. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or butcher. If he had been carrying a hatchet, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Broghammer will be delighted to see you."
The creature scurried slightly and went limp. Then it rose up on its broken legs, puffed out its abdomen and staggered ignobly toward him.
For the first time, Saul had the urge to run, but his collarbone was looking strange and his legs refused to move.
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