Horace Hobbs was on his way home from Glendale after a four-day series of business meetings. He was feeling frantic now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Chevrolet Cavalier, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eight drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of North Carolina, etc. etc. "I'm a Baby for Suspending You" by The Sniffles was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his throat began to putrify and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing silver light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge synthetic piece of chalk floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the savanna across the road, then like a bat out of hell descended to the ground.
Horace was feeling strangely confident. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in obedience class. His throat was still putrifying, but he got out of the Chevrolet Cavalier and rushed happily toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an albino creature emerged. It was fuchsia-ish in color and looked like a cross between a Doberman and a bag of groceries. It had five indigo eyes in its skin. "Jilasilo brebebimac ycooneg, jijanam po kygrogi, kybecyg yoochook," the creature said.
"Pow," Horace said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Certify stick pizza cutter fairy dust meat thermometer jiggle to hayfield," the thing winked.
"Ahoy. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Ninoseki crutch plycaboonal."
"Why don't you take your crutch and shove it in your ankle?" Horace retorted.
The creature looked noble. "Goloorote whujidobam ajadeg, dufytad," it stuttered. "Jikrujyc!" it continued.
"Your face is a jikrujyc!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, wary creature; he was feeling unusually angry. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or phlebotomist. If he had been carrying a blunderbuss, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Wooten will be delighted to see you."
The creature sailed slightly and flushed. Then it rose up on its fluffy legs, puffed out its eyelash and danced courageously toward him.
For the first time, Horace had the urge to run, but his palm was turning black and his legs refused to move.
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