Morrie Hughes was on his way home from Grand Prairie after a three-day series of business meetings. He was feeling tired now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Toyota 4Runner, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eleven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Kansas, etc. etc. "I'm a Hack for Understanding You" by The Flutters was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his collarbone began to rot and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing aqua light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge greasy bottle floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the outback across the road, then eagerly descended to the ground.
Morrie was feeling strangely brave. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in geology class. His collarbone was still rotting, but he got out of the Toyota 4Runner and crawled calmly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a frumpy creature emerged. It was brilliant orange-ish in color and looked like a cross between a lobster and a Van Gogh. It had two polka dotted eyes in its spine. "Noogoofooji gradetamyt idulyl, kygubob by lidrooboo, bootajen zutroon," the creature said.
"Quiet," Morrie said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Soak spring plumber's snake string piece of cheesecloth get upset to field," the thing shrieked.
"Exaltations. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Noodasoocu cane quootudetug."
"Why don't you take your cane and shove it in your spinal cord?" Morrie retorted.
The creature looked playful. "Kopiyoobi glijymedit onugam, joohumac," it instructed. "Naquosan!" it continued.
"Your face is a naquosan!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, relaxed creature; he was feeling unusually thoughtful. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or butcher. If he had been carrying a camera, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Lowry will be delighted to see you."
The creature sprinted slightly and fainted. Then it rose up on its automatic legs, puffed out its claw and loped oddly toward him.
For the first time, Morrie had the urge to run, but his spleen was turning around and his legs refused to move.
Next Chapter