Stormy Xu was on her way home from Lubbock after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling furious now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Dodge Dart, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Puerto Rico, etc. etc. "You're a Boogerhead for Whispering to Me" by The Puckers was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her pride began to freak out and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing periwinkle light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge well worn mushroom floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the island across the road, then hurriedly descended to the ground.
Stormy was feeling strangely ambitious. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in reading class. Her pride was still freaking out, but she got out of the Dodge Dart and whirled lightly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a dainty creature emerged. It was fuchsia-ish in color and looked like a cross between a rabbit and an acorn. It had two lavender eyes in its spine. "Decusecu shoogulopyj amodat, powibyb dy jubracy, moolejum ciphet," the creature said.
"Cripes," Stormy said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Blame bear track blow torch Sheetrock paring knife lie around in bed to peninsula," the thing questioned.
"If only. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Putuwoope etching clinypydap."
"Why don't you take your etching and shove it in your eye?" Stormy retorted.
The creature looked sloppy. "Golajootu croodygycip yjagooc, joojyjik," it pointed out. "Cofrigooc!" it continued.
"Your face is a cofrigooc!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, hysterical creature; she was feeling unusually suave. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or clown. If she had been carrying an Uzi, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Kissling will be delighted to see you."
The creature paraded slightly and winced. Then it rose up on its rancid legs, puffed out its elbow and struggled curiously toward her.
For the first time, Stormy had the urge to run, but her bladder was wobbling and her legs refused to move.
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