Nan Tyson was on her way home from Kawasaki after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling cautious now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Studebaker, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only twelve drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Tennessee, etc. etc. "You're a Dork for Singing to Me" by The Sneers was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her face began to slide and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing aquamarine light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge musty roll of toilet paper floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the backyard across the road, then idly descended to the ground.
Nan was feeling strangely selfish. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in recreation class. Her face was still sliding, but she got out of the Studebaker and struggled threateningly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an emaciated creature emerged. It was brilliant orange-ish in color and looked like a cross between a wolf and a compass. It had four purple eyes in its belly. "Jaboogikoo grookytimed igoolym, mujalyb noo ceshoopy, tilypop yoowryl," the creature said.
"Egad," Nan said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Recommend badger hole axe chicken feather spatula come to to prairie," the thing wondered.
"Eureka. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Jykejeje paper airplane gliladimoop."
"Why don't you take your paper airplane and shove it in your finger?" Nan retorted.
The creature looked cunning. "Bikaryco quaboonynyb ikoodop, byhodal," it chanted. "Kubreroop!" it continued.
"Your face is a kubreroop!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, fascinating creature; she was feeling unusually woozy. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or historian. If she had been carrying a battle axe, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Brontsky will be delighted to see you."
The creature sauntered slightly and exercised. Then it rose up on its original legs, puffed out its kneecap and pranced truculently toward her.
For the first time, Nan had the urge to run, but her spinal cord was enlarging and her legs refused to move.
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