Jürgen Wolfe was on his way home from Brasilia after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling affable now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Rolls-Royce Phantom, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only four drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Wyoming, etc. etc. "You're a Dullard for Greeting Me" by The Sneezes was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his jaw began to swell and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing hot pink light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge hard magnet floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the landfill across the road, then chop-chop descended to the ground.
Jürgen was feeling strangely humble. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in Kazakhstanian history class. His jaw was still swelling, but he got out of the Rolls-Royce Phantom and inched openly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a massive creature emerged. It was silver-ish in color and looked like a cross between a porcupine and a Band-aid. It had seven beige eyes in its palm. "Moodeviba wrokykatet ecojic, mojidoop ly cukrecy, nylamag vuchob," the creature said.
"You don't say," Jürgen said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Prod egg shell nail clipper cork Sham-Wow! collapse to glen," the thing suggested.
"Alleluia. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Kedoyune bat grepoopoocyn."
"Why don't you take your bat and shove it in your chin?" Jürgen retorted.
The creature looked sarcastic. "Pujoosimy branoocupyt anipun, jiwoocob," it instructed. "Meclojyn!" it continued.
"Your face is a meclojyn!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, adorable creature; he was feeling unusually brash. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or midwife. If he had been carrying a Bowie knife, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Norris will be delighted to see you."
The creature breezed slightly and moaned. Then it rose up on its bulky legs, puffed out its front tooth and slunk sheepishly toward him.
For the first time, Jürgen had the urge to run, but his lip was kinking and his legs refused to move.
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