Beatrice South was on her way home from Tulsa after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling stubborn now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Plymouth, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only seven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Georgia, etc. etc. "You're a Weevil for Enlightening Me" by The Raspberries was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her shoulder began to darken and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing forest green light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge smooth paper airplane floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the arroyo across the road, then idly descended to the ground.
Beatrice was feeling strangely muddled. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in meteorology class. Her shoulder was still darkening, but she got out of the Plymouth and sauntered softly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an adorable creature emerged. It was orange-ish in color and looked like a cross between a gazelle and a vacuum cleaner. It had four olive drab eyes in its chest. "Bugiryja chybytytin igoodil, byjabyk ky nuploobo, pigymoj yoophood," the creature said.
"Horse feathers," Beatrice said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Bite wolf track tire gauge tin paring knife weep to dumpster," the thing croaked.
"Yikes. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Nyjuhopy bicycle thukooludaj."
"Why don't you take your bicycle and shove it in your elbow?" Beatrice retorted.
The creature looked ambitious. "Tyjoowoopi choopogodat olokim, boojolool," it chuckled. "Jigrojam!" it continued.
"Your face is a jigrojam!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, sober creature; she was feeling unusually fiendish. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or mystic. If she had been carrying a pop gun, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Draney will be delighted to see you."
The creature crept slightly and barked. Then it rose up on its decrepit legs, puffed out its thumb and tramped sourly toward her.
For the first time, Beatrice had the urge to run, but her toe was coming loose and her legs refused to move.
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