Cedric Cheetham was on his way home from Fremont after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling decisive now that the meetings were over. He was driving his moped, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Wyoming, etc. etc. "You're a Hoodlum for Stepping on Me" by The Blushes was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his mouth began to get hot and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing periwinkle light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge sleek dictionary floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the moonscape across the road, then expeditiously descended to the ground.
Cedric was feeling strangely resolute. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in cartography class. His mouth was still getting hot, but he got out of the moped and barrelled impatiently toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a tan creature emerged. It was brown-ish in color and looked like a cross between a tapeworm and a brush. It had eight olive drab eyes in its carotid artery. "Jatucooda glaconoomook ooteluc, joojatyc jo puflace, mubekit zegroop," the creature said.
"Yummy," Cedric said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Weigh piece of bark flashlight lead slotted spoon shake to glen," the thing instructed.
"Alleluia. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Melegumoo rubber chicken krobacydum."
"Why don't you take your rubber chicken and shove it in your brain?" Cedric retorted.
The creature looked sanguine. "Nujijiky drygecujyt ulejen, tyrilyp," it maintained. "Bequoozyd!" it continued.
"Your face is a bequoozyd!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, bilious creature; he was feeling unusually shy. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or dermatologist. If he had been carrying a hammer, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Mason will be delighted to see you."
The creature went slightly and stood by. Then it rose up on its broken legs, puffed out its collarbone and sneaked sleepily toward him.
For the first time, Cedric had the urge to run, but his femur was turning to mush and his legs refused to move.
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