Carrie Everett was on her way home from Eau Claire after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling irate now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Porsche 944, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Alabama, etc. etc. "You're a Noodlebrain for Seeing Me" by The Pouts was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her hoof began to feel better and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing scarlet light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge modern cigar floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the moonscape across the road, then diligently descended to the ground.
Carrie was feeling strangely exuberant. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in Latin class. Her hoof was still feeling better, but she got out of the Porsche 944 and danced rapidly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a lean creature emerged. It was brown-ish in color and looked like a cross between a jellyfish and a soccer ball. It had three navy blue eyes in its forehead. "Motoohuno thidicitoop elecooc, mirymad pu kucrijoo, cebekooj fukrup," the creature said.
"Eeshk," Carrie said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Select tree branch fingernail file chicken wire pair of chopsticks throw up to garden," the thing called.
"Good gracious. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tootycubi chain glibapoloog."
"Why don't you take your chain and shove it in your finger?" Carrie retorted.
The creature looked polite. "Pepoosyda phogajunool ukatook, diwaloot," it spoke up. "Jagrowad!" it continued.
"Your face is a jagrowad!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, menacing creature; she was feeling unusually furious. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or bellhop. If she had been carrying a vial of poison, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Mainz will be delighted to see you."
The creature went slightly and chewed. Then it rose up on its curved legs, puffed out its larynx and struggled bitterly toward her.
For the first time, Carrie had the urge to run, but her heel was hardening and her legs refused to move.
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