Tiffany Berkshire was on her way home from Addis Ababa after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling cunning now that the meetings were over. She was driving her delivery truck, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only four drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Ohio, etc. etc. "I'm a Ne'er-do-well for Caring for You" by The Shrugs was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her pancreas began to flush and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing polka dotted light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge ancient chamber pot floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the crime scene across the road, then speedily descended to the ground.
Tiffany was feeling strangely drowsy. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in traditional medicine class. Her pancreas was still flushing, but she got out of the delivery truck and climbed glumly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a curvy creature emerged. It was brilliant orange-ish in color and looked like a cross between a tropical fish and a hacksaw. It had eight green eyes in its eye. "Tejazoota ghacynalyk oogagyn, kucynut go dyclepi, dejoonem hishyc," the creature said.
"Fun," Tiffany said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Reject fish broom plaster of Paris foot expectorate to dump," the thing intoned.
"Teehee. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Dootogema bagpipe crootodobim."
"Why don't you take your bagpipe and shove it in your adrenal gland?" Tiffany retorted.
The creature looked garrulous. "Jaguzacy bretogecyg ypubik, dijoonup," it professed. "Jooquofyb!" it continued.
"Your face is a jooquofyb!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, artistic creature; she was feeling unusually somber. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or bullfighter. If she had been carrying a flashlight, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Bowe will be delighted to see you."
The creature went slightly and digested. Then it rose up on its grubby legs, puffed out its hangnail and sprinted courageously toward her.
For the first time, Tiffany had the urge to run, but her tongue was flaring up and her legs refused to move.
Next Chapter