Upton Rosen was on his way home from Capetown after a four-day series of business meetings. He was feeling brash now that the meetings were over. He was driving his bicycle, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eight drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Ohio, etc. etc. "You're a Pansy for Pinning Me" by The Wrinkled noses was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his brain began to shiver and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing grey light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge synthetic Frisbee floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the crime scene across the road, then hastily descended to the ground.
Upton was feeling strangely tense. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in cryptography class. His brain was still shivering, but he got out of the bicycle and waltzed despondently toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a frail creature emerged. It was jade-ish in color and looked like a cross between a goldfish and an iPod. It had six indigo eyes in its tail. "Cutywytu chapoojicen ebubog, cyfoogep doo cawhube, boloojooc fichal," the creature said.
"Egad," Upton said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Comprehend raspberry bush punch pillow foot tremble to hayfield," the thing blathered.
"There-there. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Jonaryny microscope kroobicabip."
"Why don't you take your microscope and shove it in your thorax?" Upton retorted.
The creature looked ignoble. "Dajoryku quimylamon oogytak, dygycyd," it quavered. "Gookroocool!" it continued.
"Your face is a gookroocool!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, sexy creature; he was feeling unusually cuddly. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or park ranger. If he had been carrying a sickle, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Lopez will be delighted to see you."
The creature bolted slightly and sniffled. Then it rose up on its frilly legs, puffed out its leg and sailed diligently toward him.
For the first time, Upton had the urge to run, but his hand was radiating and his legs refused to move.
Next Chapter