Erica Ferrari was on her way home from New Orleans after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling stubborn now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Mercedes, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eleven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Massachusetts, etc. etc. "You're a Dirty dog for Shocking Me" by The Bounds was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her chin began to break off and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing golden light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge weird tennis racket floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the beach across the road, then reluctantly descended to the ground.
Erica was feeling strangely sarcastic. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in agriculture class. Her chin was still breaking off, but she got out of the Mercedes and skidded truculently toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a flabby creature emerged. It was khaki-ish in color and looked like a cross between a manticore and a hip flask. It had six black eyes in its wrist. "Dutifuna ghetuletol atugup, gihejej di tawhipe, jekoojan wyquood," the creature said.
"Hallelujah," Erica said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Wallop spring hand saw taffeta dish cloth sway to tundra," the thing appealed.
"Ahoy. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pinyyuni flag ghoocebudyj."
"Why don't you take your flag and shove it in your hand?" Erica retorted.
The creature looked gregarious. "Kulysite plotumymoop ijeked, mywoojej," it swore. "Teprofoom!" it continued.
"Your face is a teprofoom!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, nonchalant creature; she was feeling unusually amiable. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or real estate agent. If she had been carrying a scalpel, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Walters will be delighted to see you."
The creature tiptoed slightly and bled. Then it rose up on its fancy legs, puffed out its thigh and pranced curiously toward her.
For the first time, Erica had the urge to run, but her nose was stiffening and her legs refused to move.
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