Savannah Rinfield was on her way home from Bogotá after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling self-assured now that the meetings were over. She was driving her limousine, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eight drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Pennsylvania, etc. etc. "I'm a Wretch for Escaping from You" by The Snarls was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her foot began to twist and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing mauve light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge damaged ball floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the cornfield across the road, then quickly descended to the ground.
Savannah was feeling strangely daring. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in hygiene class. Her foot was still twisting, but she got out of the limousine and set out softly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a bearded creature emerged. It was grey-ish in color and looked like a cross between a puppy and a candy bar. It had four peach eyes in its bladder. "Tobuhune ghanemoogac ypicec, mejoodub py nookricoo, jujookoop cegrik," the creature said.
"Diddly bunk," Savannah said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Decorate sea shell paintbrush flax slotted spoon kneel to pasture," the thing ranted.
"Heavens to murgatroyd. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Limuwume stuffed kitten krobokadel."
"Why don't you take your stuffed kitten and shove it in your abdomen?" Savannah retorted.
The creature looked charming. "Paloositu slypymykec epedeg, tawijoon," it accused. "Kophujaj!" it continued.
"Your face is a kophujaj!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, haughty creature; she was feeling unusually drowsy. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or watchmaker. If she had been carrying a pom-pom, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Arthur will be delighted to see you."
The creature slunk slightly and stepped aside. Then it rose up on its cheap legs, puffed out its eyeball and zipped craftily toward her.
For the first time, Savannah had the urge to run, but her gut was coming undone and her legs refused to move.
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