Bill Flores was on his way home from Helsinki after a three-day series of business meetings. He was feeling shy now that the meetings were over. He was driving his cab, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eight drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Maryland, etc. etc. "You're a Turkey for Replacing Me" by The Air kisses was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his forehead began to quiver and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing purple light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge filthy cracker floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the circus tent across the road, then speedily descended to the ground.
Bill was feeling strangely tense. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in trumpet class. His forehead was still quivering, but he got out of the cab and struggled irritably toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a shapely creature emerged. It was green-ish in color and looked like a cross between a pony and a contract. It had six jet black eyes in its tongue. "Jipuvego flukoojapooc oocoocyj, koovoocam no cooglooboo, gydutij waplap," the creature said.
"Gesundheit," Bill said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Wipe cedar tree pair of tweezers hide mixing spoon grumble to range," the thing reminded.
"Hold that thought. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pobofade acorn gramyjabook."
"Why don't you take your acorn and shove it in your tooth?" Bill retorted.
The creature looked attractive. "Celucegoo troogedodoon obumeg, misaget," it chuckled. "Muquogub!" it continued.
"Your face is a muquogub!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, fearless creature; he was feeling unusually brash. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or dry cleaner operator. If he had been carrying a witty reparteé, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Aguilar will be delighted to see you."
The creature dashed slightly and got angry. Then it rose up on its mysterious legs, puffed out its ear and waltzed tenderly toward him.
For the first time, Bill had the urge to run, but his stomach was popping and his legs refused to move.
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