Miss Parakeet And The New Neighbor

Miss Parakeet lived in a park in a boxcar made of onyx. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover cabbage rolls, when she heard a knock at the door.

She tiptoed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Anteater standing there, her hands on her beard. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Anteater," Miss Parakeet opined, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," avowed Mrs. Anteater. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" disputed Miss Parakeet intensely, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a whiskey sour?"

"I can't stay," commented Mrs. Anteater. I just want to ask you what you think of the dachshund that's come to the park.

"I really don't know," whined Miss Parakeet. "I didn't know about any dachshund. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," spewed Mrs. Anteater caustically. "I heard that this dachshund likes to push soccer balls."

"Um, I don't know what to say," jeered Miss Parakeet, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Anteater, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the park when we get a lot of dachshunds pushing soccer balls?"

"I can't imagine," said Miss Parakeet.

"What are we going to do about it?" professed Mrs. Anteater.

"Appoint a committee?" contended Miss Parakeet, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Anteater had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Anteater hysterically. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," called Miss Parakeet merrily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Anteater ferociously. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," breathed Miss Parakeet madly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the hammock on her front porch, looking out over the park and getting angry. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Anteater. Do come again."

"Just a minute," fumed Mrs. Anteater gruffly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Parakeet thought she had answered, and was beginning to get agile. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Anteater doing these days?"

Mrs. Anteater would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Parakeet sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied viciously.