Miss Newt And The New Neighbor

Miss Newt lived on a peninsula in a geodesic dome made of sandstone. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover fried eggs, when she heard a knock at the door.

She galloped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Pigeon standing there, her hands on her claw. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Pigeon," Miss Newt alleged, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," requested Mrs. Pigeon. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" screamed Miss Newt vacantly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of fruit punch?"

"I can't stay," nattered Mrs. Pigeon. I just want to ask you what you think of the phantom that's come to the peninsula.

"I really don't know," whimpered Miss Newt. "I didn't know about any phantom. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," lamented Mrs. Pigeon grudgingly. "I heard that this phantom likes to freeze saddles."

"Um, I don't know what to say," snarled Miss Newt, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Pigeon, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the peninsula when we get a lot of phantoms freezing saddles?"

"I can't imagine," shrieked Miss Newt.

"What are we going to do about it?" giggled Mrs. Pigeon.

"Appoint a committee?" interpreted Miss Newt, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Pigeon had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Pigeon awkwardly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," hinted Miss Newt effortlessly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Pigeon crossly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," murmured Miss Newt threateningly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the billiard table on her front porch, looking out over the peninsula and getting frazzled. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Pigeon. Do come again."

"Just a minute," snarled Mrs. Pigeon stupidly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Newt thought she had answered, and was beginning to get creepy. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Pigeon doing these days?"

Mrs. Pigeon would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Newt sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied later.