Miss Caribou And The New Neighbor

Miss Caribou lived in a backyard in a stinky shack made of tiles. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover hors d'oeuvre, when she heard a knock at the door.

She sauntered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Fawn standing there, her hands on her bladder. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Fawn," Miss Caribou uttered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," provoked Mrs. Fawn. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" fretted Miss Caribou sweetly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a kamikaze?"

"I can't stay," announced Mrs. Fawn. I just want to ask you what you think of the kitten that's come to the backyard.

"I really don't know," protested Miss Caribou. "I didn't know about any kitten. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," boasted Mrs. Fawn lickety-split. "I heard that this kitten likes to drag file folders."

"Um, I don't know what to say," panted Miss Caribou, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Fawn, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the backyard when we get a lot of kittens dragging file folders?"

"I can't imagine," rationalized Miss Caribou.

"What are we going to do about it?" purred Mrs. Fawn.

"Appoint a committee?" analyzed Miss Caribou, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Fawn had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Fawn merrily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," swore Miss Caribou again, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Fawn coldly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," bellowed Miss Caribou proudly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the hatstand on her front porch, looking out over the backyard and staring into space. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Fawn. Do come again."

"Just a minute," shuddered Mrs. Fawn curiously. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Caribou thought she had answered, and was beginning to get paranoid. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Fawn doing these days?"

Mrs. Fawn would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Caribou sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied suspiciously.