Mister Porcupine And The New Neighbor

Mister Porcupine lived in a treetop in a yurt made of fiberglass. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lime sherbet, when he heard a knock at the door.

He tumbled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Quail standing there, her hands on her hair. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Quail," Mister Porcupine brought up, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," fretted Mrs. Quail. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" concluded Mister Porcupine gleefully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a root beer float?"

"I can't stay," belched Mrs. Quail. I just want to ask you what you think of the pig that's come to the treetop.

"I really don't know," repeated Mister Porcupine. "I didn't know about any pig. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," expressed Mrs. Quail swiftly. "I heard that this pig likes to measure Kindles."

"Um, I don't know what to say," conversed Mister Porcupine, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Quail, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the treetop when we get a lot of pigs measureing Kindles?"

"I can't imagine," exclaimed Mister Porcupine.

"What are we going to do about it?" stammered Mrs. Quail.

"Appoint a committee?" squealed Mister Porcupine, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Quail had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Quail automatically. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," stated Mister Porcupine narrowly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Quail dubiously. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," exploded Mister Porcupine stealthily, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the buffet on his front porch, looking out over the treetop and rejoicing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Quail. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chortled Mrs. Quail busily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Porcupine thought he had answered, and was beginning to get dark. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Quail doing these days?"

Mrs. Quail would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Porcupine sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied greedily.