Miss Lynx And The New Neighbor

Miss Lynx lived on a hillside in a spa made of posts and beams. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tofu, when she heard a knock at the door.

She flounced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Oyster standing there, her hands on her fingernail. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Oyster," Miss Lynx roared, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," pointed out Mrs. Oyster. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" stammered Miss Lynx gracefully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a hot toddy?"

"I can't stay," ranted Mrs. Oyster. I just want to ask you what you think of the dodo bird that's come to the hillside.

"I really don't know," declaimed Miss Lynx. "I didn't know about any dodo bird. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," snarled Mrs. Oyster resignedly. "I heard that this dodo bird likes to prune blank checks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," explained Miss Lynx, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Oyster, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the hillside when we get a lot of dodo birds pruning blank checks?"

"I can't imagine," acknowledged Miss Lynx.

"What are we going to do about it?" gabbed Mrs. Oyster.

"Appoint a committee?" muttered Miss Lynx, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Oyster had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Oyster gleefully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," cried Miss Lynx cautiously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Oyster hopelessly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," accused Miss Lynx vacantly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the safe on her front porch, looking out over the hillside and bleeding. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Oyster. Do come again."

"Just a minute," analyzed Mrs. Oyster coldly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Lynx thought she had answered, and was beginning to get annoying. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Oyster doing these days?"

Mrs. Oyster would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Lynx sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied sagely.