Miss Leopard And The New Neighbor

Miss Leopard lived in a meadow in a chalet made of matchsticks. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover hamburgers, when she heard a knock at the door.

She marched to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Macaque standing there, his hands on his fingernail. "How nice to see you, Mister Macaque," Miss Leopard emphasized, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," continued Mister Macaque. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" protested Miss Leopard suavely, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a gimlet?"

"I can't stay," barked Mister Macaque. I just want to ask you what you think of the pigeon that's come to the meadow.

"I really don't know," hissed Miss Leopard. "I didn't know about any pigeon. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," piped up Mister Macaque despondently. "I heard that this pigeon likes to fry batteries."

"Um, I don't know what to say," noted Miss Leopard, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Macaque, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the meadow when we get a lot of pigeons frying batteries?"

"I can't imagine," vowed Miss Leopard.

"What are we going to do about it?" piped up Mister Macaque.

"Appoint a committee?" belched Miss Leopard, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Macaque had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Macaque sharply. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," purred Miss Leopard madly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Macaque proudly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," admitted Miss Leopard victoriously, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the umbrella stand on her front porch, looking out over the meadow and hollering. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Macaque. Do come again."

"Just a minute," stormed Mister Macaque unexpectedly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Leopard thought she had answered, and was beginning to get sassy. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Macaque doing these days?"

Mister Macaque would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Leopard sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied unexpectedly.