Mister Lizard And The New Neighbor

Mister Lizard lived on a moonscape in a farmhouse made of adobe. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover macaroni and cheese, when he heard a knock at the door.

He marched to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Dodo bird standing there, her hands on her tooth. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Dodo bird," Mister Lizard fretted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," debated Mrs. Dodo bird. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" simpered Mister Lizard sweetly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of fruit punch?"

"I can't stay," laughed Mrs. Dodo bird. I just want to ask you what you think of the lizard that's come to the moonscape.

"I really don't know," squeaked Mister Lizard. "I didn't know about any lizard. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," commented Mrs. Dodo bird quietly. "I heard that this lizard likes to dust canes."

"Um, I don't know what to say," nattered Mister Lizard, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Dodo bird, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the moonscape when we get a lot of lizards dusting canes?"

"I can't imagine," gasped Mister Lizard.

"What are we going to do about it?" mentioned Mrs. Dodo bird.

"Appoint a committee?" commented Mister Lizard, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Dodo bird had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Dodo bird timidly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," bellowed Mister Lizard speedily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Dodo bird languidly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," mumbled Mister Lizard quickly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the bath mat on his front porch, looking out over the moonscape and weeping. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Dodo bird. Do come again."

"Just a minute," wailed Mrs. Dodo bird energetically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Lizard thought he had answered, and was beginning to get deadly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Dodo bird doing these days?"

Mrs. Dodo bird would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Lizard sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied unnaturally.