Miss Toad And The New Neighbor

Miss Toad lived in a marsh in a teepee made of moss. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover scrambled eggs, when she heard a knock at the door.

She ambled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Lobster standing there, her hands on her hip. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Lobster," Miss Toad retorted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," sobbed Mrs. Lobster. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" articulated Miss Toad lovingly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of bourbon?"

"I can't stay," exclaimed Mrs. Lobster. I just want to ask you what you think of the wolverine that's come to the marsh.

"I really don't know," brought up Miss Toad. "I didn't know about any wolverine. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," nattered Mrs. Lobster woodenly. "I heard that this wolverine likes to describe paintbrushes."

"Um, I don't know what to say," tittered Miss Toad, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Lobster, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the marsh when we get a lot of wolverines describing paintbrushes?"

"I can't imagine," hummed Miss Toad.

"What are we going to do about it?" asserted Mrs. Lobster.

"Appoint a committee?" piped up Miss Toad, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Lobster had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Lobster quickly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," noted Miss Toad unexpectedly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Lobster gracefully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," jeered Miss Toad strangely, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the stairway on her front porch, looking out over the marsh and quivering. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Lobster. Do come again."

"Just a minute," squawked Mrs. Lobster energetically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Toad thought she had answered, and was beginning to get forgetful. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Lobster doing these days?"

Mrs. Lobster would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Toad sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied brashly.