Miss Anaconda And The New Neighbor

Miss Anaconda lived on a plateau in a nunnery made of foil. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover crumb cake, when she heard a knock at the door.

She paraded to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Crow standing there, his hands on his vein. "How nice to see you, Mister Crow," Miss Anaconda appealed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," vouched Mister Crow. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" whimpered Miss Anaconda viciously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cappuccino?"

"I can't stay," snorted Mister Crow. I just want to ask you what you think of the coyote that's come to the plateau.

"I really don't know," asked Miss Anaconda. "I didn't know about any coyote. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," insisted Mister Crow ingeniously. "I heard that this coyote likes to propel magnets."

"Um, I don't know what to say," murmured Miss Anaconda, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Crow, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the plateau when we get a lot of coyotes propelling magnets?"

"I can't imagine," blubbered Miss Anaconda.

"What are we going to do about it?" chuckled Mister Crow.

"Appoint a committee?" realized Miss Anaconda, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Crow had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Crow sorrowfully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," rebutted Miss Anaconda angrily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Crow courageously. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," reacted Miss Anaconda strangely, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the coat rack on her front porch, looking out over the plateau and getting frazzled. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Crow. Do come again."

"Just a minute," gasped Mister Crow lovingly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Anaconda thought she had answered, and was beginning to get intense. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Crow doing these days?"

Mister Crow would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Anaconda sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied happily.