Mister Pekingese And The New Neighbor

Mister Pekingese lived in a country meadow in a manor made of metal. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover succotash, when he heard a knock at the door.

He bounced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Anaconda standing there, his hands on his belly. "How nice to see you, Mister Anaconda," Mister Pekingese maintained, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," rambled Mister Anaconda. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" yawned Mister Pekingese thankfully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of KoolAid?"

"I can't stay," lamented Mister Anaconda. I just want to ask you what you think of the hog that's come to the country meadow.

"I really don't know," suggested Mister Pekingese. "I didn't know about any hog. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," jeered Mister Anaconda glumly. "I heard that this hog likes to bend advertisements."

"Um, I don't know what to say," requested Mister Pekingese, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Anaconda, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the country meadow when we get a lot of hogs bending advertisements?"

"I can't imagine," swore Mister Pekingese.

"What are we going to do about it?" giggled Mister Anaconda.

"Appoint a committee?" hissed Mister Pekingese, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Anaconda had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Anaconda ignobly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," screeched Mister Pekingese dubiously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Anaconda lightly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," smirked Mister Pekingese courteously, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the china cabinet on his front porch, looking out over the country meadow and playing Farmer in the Dell. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Anaconda. Do come again."

"Just a minute," enunciated Mister Anaconda gratefully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Pekingese thought he had answered, and was beginning to get athletic. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Anaconda doing these days?"

Mister Anaconda would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Pekingese sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied dolorously.