Miss Guinea Pig And The New Neighbor

Miss Guinea pig lived on a range in a penthouse made of gold bricks. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover pumpkin pie, when she heard a knock at the door.

She stalked to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Robot standing there, his hands on his hangnail. "How nice to see you, Mister Robot," Miss Guinea pig began, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," comforted Mister Robot. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" taunted Miss Guinea pig brightly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of cocoa?"

"I can't stay," screamed Mister Robot. I just want to ask you what you think of the bison that's come to the range.

"I really don't know," rumored Miss Guinea pig. "I didn't know about any bison. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," explained Mister Robot lightly. "I heard that this bison likes to expose water bottles."

"Um, I don't know what to say," yelped Miss Guinea pig, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Robot, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the range when we get a lot of bison exposing water bottles?"

"I can't imagine," wept Miss Guinea pig.

"What are we going to do about it?" urged Mister Robot.

"Appoint a committee?" tittered Miss Guinea pig, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Robot had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Robot haughtily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," implored Miss Guinea pig hastily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Robot blankly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," sneered Miss Guinea pig kindly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the rug on her front porch, looking out over the range and catching up. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Robot. Do come again."

"Just a minute," repeated Mister Robot zestily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Guinea pig thought she had answered, and was beginning to get sleek. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Robot doing these days?"

Mister Robot would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Guinea pig sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied coolly.