Mister Rhinoceros And The New Neighbor

Mister Rhinoceros lived on a range in a spa made of Tyvek. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover mulligan stew, when he heard a knock at the door.

He pranced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Hyena standing there, his hands on his artery. "How nice to see you, Mister Hyena," Mister Rhinoceros smiled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," growled Mister Hyena. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" tittered Mister Rhinoceros fearlessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Harvey Wallbanger?"

"I can't stay," avowed Mister Hyena. I just want to ask you what you think of the bunny that's come to the range.

"I really don't know," retorted Mister Rhinoceros. "I didn't know about any bunny. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," clarified Mister Hyena urgently. "I heard that this bunny likes to review flowerpots."

"Um, I don't know what to say," spat Mister Rhinoceros, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Hyena, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the range when we get a lot of bunnies reviewing flowerpots?"

"I can't imagine," barked Mister Rhinoceros.

"What are we going to do about it?" mouthed Mister Hyena.

"Appoint a committee?" yelled Mister Rhinoceros, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Hyena had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Hyena flightily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," bellowed Mister Rhinoceros carefully, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Hyena doubtfully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," thought Mister Rhinoceros silently, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the safe on his front porch, looking out over the range and howling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Hyena. Do come again."

"Just a minute," provoked Mister Hyena immediately. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Rhinoceros thought he had answered, and was beginning to get fearless. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Hyena doing these days?"

Mister Hyena would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Rhinoceros sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied tenderly.