Mister Chimpanzee And The New Neighbor

Mister Chimpanzee lived in a canyon in a sod house made of glass brick. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tuna casserole, when he heard a knock at the door.

He galloped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Hawk standing there, her hands on her pinky. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Hawk," Mister Chimpanzee wailed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," begged Mrs. Hawk. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" blurted Mister Chimpanzee impatiently, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Shirley Temple?"

"I can't stay," clarified Mrs. Hawk. I just want to ask you what you think of the cheetah that's come to the canyon.

"I really don't know," reasoned Mister Chimpanzee. "I didn't know about any cheetah. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," offered Mrs. Hawk impatiently. "I heard that this cheetah likes to replace iPods."

"Um, I don't know what to say," imitated Mister Chimpanzee, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Hawk, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the canyon when we get a lot of cheetahs replacing iPods?"

"I can't imagine," exclaimed Mister Chimpanzee.

"What are we going to do about it?" stated Mrs. Hawk.

"Appoint a committee?" added Mister Chimpanzee, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Hawk had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Hawk excitedly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," indicated Mister Chimpanzee caustically, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Hawk energetically. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," called Mister Chimpanzee arrogantly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the bench on his front porch, looking out over the canyon and hiccuping. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Hawk. Do come again."

"Just a minute," sputtered Mrs. Hawk angrily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Chimpanzee thought he had answered, and was beginning to get yappy. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Hawk doing these days?"

Mrs. Hawk would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Chimpanzee sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied timidly.