Miss Rhinoceros And The New Neighbor

Miss Rhinoceros lived in a country meadow in a townhouse made of masonry. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover fondue, when she heard a knock at the door.

She sidled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Ostrich standing there, his hands on his thorax. "How nice to see you, Mister Ostrich," Miss Rhinoceros argued, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," smiled Mister Ostrich. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" revealed Miss Rhinoceros cheerfully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a whiskey?"

"I can't stay," persisted Mister Ostrich. I just want to ask you what you think of the mouse that's come to the country meadow.

"I really don't know," sneered Miss Rhinoceros. "I didn't know about any mouse. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," stuttered Mister Ostrich admiringly. "I heard that this mouse likes to face flags."

"Um, I don't know what to say," articulated Miss Rhinoceros, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Ostrich, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the country meadow when we get a lot of mice facing flags?"

"I can't imagine," chimed Miss Rhinoceros.

"What are we going to do about it?" trumpeted Mister Ostrich.

"Appoint a committee?" articulated Miss Rhinoceros, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Ostrich had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Ostrich doubtfully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," announced Miss Rhinoceros admiringly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Ostrich reluctantly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," implored Miss Rhinoceros proudly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the crib on her front porch, looking out over the country meadow and squeaking. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Ostrich. Do come again."

"Just a minute," screamed Mister Ostrich cleverly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Rhinoceros thought she had answered, and was beginning to get monstrous. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Ostrich doing these days?"

Mister Ostrich would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Rhinoceros sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied hastily.