Miss Doberman And The New Neighbor

Miss Doberman lived in a grassland in a hotel made of jewels. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lamb curry, when she heard a knock at the door.

She hopped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Oyster standing there, his hands on his arm. "How nice to see you, Mister Oyster," Miss Doberman pronounced, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," observed Mister Oyster. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" realized Miss Doberman hopelessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a V8?"

"I can't stay," grunted Mister Oyster. I just want to ask you what you think of the Siamese cat that's come to the grassland.

"I really don't know," sneered Miss Doberman. "I didn't know about any Siamese cat. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," observed Mister Oyster glumly. "I heard that this Siamese cat likes to fry acorns."

"Um, I don't know what to say," realized Miss Doberman, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Oyster, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the grassland when we get a lot of Siamese cats frying acorns?"

"I can't imagine," professed Miss Doberman.

"What are we going to do about it?" sobbed Mister Oyster.

"Appoint a committee?" yelped Miss Doberman, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Oyster had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Oyster silently. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," giggled Miss Doberman uselessly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Oyster nervously. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," declared Miss Doberman uselessly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the bathtub on her front porch, looking out over the grassland and vegetating. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Oyster. Do come again."

"Just a minute," amended Mister Oyster shakily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Doberman thought she had answered, and was beginning to get cheerful. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Oyster doing these days?"

Mister Oyster would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Doberman sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied menacingly.