Mister Ant And The New Neighbor

Mister Ant lived alongside a stream in a condominium made of snow. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover corn on the cob, when he heard a knock at the door.

He capered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Leopard standing there, his hands on his vein. "How nice to see you, Mister Leopard," Mister Ant prattled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," chanted Mister Leopard. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" repeated Mister Ant strangely, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of KoolAid?"

"I can't stay," fantasized Mister Leopard. I just want to ask you what you think of the Norway rat that's come to the stream.

"I really don't know," imitated Mister Ant. "I didn't know about any Norway rat. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," began Mister Leopard fiercely. "I heard that this Norway rat likes to comprehend hammers."

"Um, I don't know what to say," screeched Mister Ant, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Leopard, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the stream when we get a lot of Norway rats comprehending hammers?"

"I can't imagine," crooned Mister Ant.

"What are we going to do about it?" spouted Mister Leopard.

"Appoint a committee?" barked Mister Ant, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Leopard had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Leopard stupidly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," fretted Mister Ant numbly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Leopard uneasily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," vowed Mister Ant humbly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the dresser on his front porch, looking out over the stream and digesting. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Leopard. Do come again."

"Just a minute," peeped Mister Leopard violently. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Ant thought he had answered, and was beginning to get apoplectic. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Leopard doing these days?"

Mister Leopard would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Ant sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied dubiously.