Mister Alligator And The New Neighbor

Mister Alligator lived at a lakeside in a trailer made of fiber. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover dry toast, when he heard a knock at the door.

He ran to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Walrus standing there, his hands on his belly button. "How nice to see you, Mister Walrus," Mister Alligator pointed out, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," retorted Mister Walrus. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" imitated Mister Alligator carelessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a rum and Coke?"

"I can't stay," whined Mister Walrus. I just want to ask you what you think of the fawn that's come to the lakeside.

"I really don't know," yelled Mister Alligator. "I didn't know about any fawn. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," announced Mister Walrus wearily. "I heard that this fawn likes to plasticize baseballs."

"Um, I don't know what to say," informed Mister Alligator, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Walrus, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the lakeside when we get a lot of fawns plasticizing baseballs?"

"I can't imagine," intoned Mister Alligator.

"What are we going to do about it?" said Mister Walrus.

"Appoint a committee?" swore Mister Alligator, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Walrus had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Walrus vigorously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," intoned Mister Alligator crankily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Walrus glibly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," thought Mister Alligator resignedly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the coat rack on his front porch, looking out over the lakeside and going limp. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Walrus. Do come again."

"Just a minute," responded Mister Walrus awkwardly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Alligator thought he had answered, and was beginning to get stubborn. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Walrus doing these days?"

Mister Walrus would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Alligator sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied innocently.