Mister Monster And The New Neighbor

Mister Monster lived on a wasteland in a houseboat made of straw. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover sushi, when he heard a knock at the door.

He flew to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Horse standing there, his hands on his dignity. "How nice to see you, Mister Horse," Mister Monster fantasized, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," cajoled Mister Horse. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" ranted Mister Monster obediently, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a secret potion?"

"I can't stay," pointed out Mister Horse. I just want to ask you what you think of the ring-tailed lemur that's come to the wasteland.

"I really don't know," comforted Mister Monster. "I didn't know about any ring-tailed lemur. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," guessed Mister Horse brashly. "I heard that this ring-tailed lemur likes to wiggle stuffed bunnies."

"Um, I don't know what to say," stormed Mister Monster, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Horse, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the wasteland when we get a lot of ring-tailed lemurs wiggling stuffed bunnies?"

"I can't imagine," panted Mister Monster.

"What are we going to do about it?" tittered Mister Horse.

"Appoint a committee?" screamed Mister Monster, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Horse had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Horse ingeniously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," burbled Mister Monster patiently, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Horse ruefully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," informed Mister Monster sagely, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the hammock on his front porch, looking out over the wasteland and coughing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Horse. Do come again."

"Just a minute," asked Mister Horse vacantly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Monster thought he had answered, and was beginning to get phlegmatic. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Horse doing these days?"

Mister Horse would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Monster sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied hopelessly.