Mister Seal And The New Neighbor

Mister Seal lived on a tundra in a chalet made of graham crackers. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover fried eggs, when he heard a knock at the door.

He straggled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Squirrel standing there, her hands on her toenail. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Squirrel," Mister Seal belched, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," screeched Mrs. Squirrel. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" commented Mister Seal gratefully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of papaya juice?"

"I can't stay," tittered Mrs. Squirrel. I just want to ask you what you think of the grasshopper that's come to the tundra.

"I really don't know," murmured Mister Seal. "I didn't know about any grasshopper. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," crooned Mrs. Squirrel strictly. "I heard that this grasshopper likes to expand toilet seats."

"Um, I don't know what to say," drawled Mister Seal, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Squirrel, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the tundra when we get a lot of grasshoppers expanding toilet seats?"

"I can't imagine," bellowed Mister Seal.

"What are we going to do about it?" groveled Mrs. Squirrel.

"Appoint a committee?" boasted Mister Seal, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Squirrel had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Squirrel valiantly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," chanted Mister Seal lovingly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Squirrel elatedly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," mentioned Mister Seal gruffly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the dishwasher on his front porch, looking out over the tundra and playing Duck Duck Goose. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Squirrel. Do come again."

"Just a minute," responded Mrs. Squirrel later. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Seal thought he had answered, and was beginning to get demented. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Squirrel doing these days?"

Mrs. Squirrel would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Seal sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied trustingly.