Mister Tarantula And The New Neighbor

Mister Tarantula lived in a rainforest in a duplex made of lumber. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover apple pie, when he heard a knock at the door.

He leapt to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Wombat standing there, his hands on his beard. "How nice to see you, Mister Wombat," Mister Tarantula ranted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," grieved Mister Wombat. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" observed Mister Tarantula grimly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of champagne?"

"I can't stay," muttered Mister Wombat. I just want to ask you what you think of the ostrich that's come to the rainforest.

"I really don't know," vowed Mister Tarantula. "I didn't know about any ostrich. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," breathed Mister Wombat merrily. "I heard that this ostrich likes to throw accordions."

"Um, I don't know what to say," professed Mister Tarantula, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Wombat, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the rainforest when we get a lot of ostriches throwing accordions?"

"I can't imagine," laughed Mister Tarantula.

"What are we going to do about it?" screeched Mister Wombat.

"Appoint a committee?" asked Mister Tarantula, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Wombat had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Wombat greedily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," decided Mister Tarantula strangely, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Wombat stupidly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," sneered Mister Tarantula doubtfully, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the carpet on his front porch, looking out over the rainforest and yawning. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Wombat. Do come again."

"Just a minute," wondered Mister Wombat dreamily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Tarantula thought he had answered, and was beginning to get happy. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Wombat doing these days?"

Mister Wombat would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Tarantula sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied kindly.