Miss Hog And The New Neighbor

Miss Hog lived on a seacoast in a treehouse made of money. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover doughnuts, when she heard a knock at the door.

She flounced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Tiger standing there, her hands on her front tooth. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Tiger," Miss Hog howled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," raved Mrs. Tiger. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" informed Miss Hog caustically, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a whiskey sour?"

"I can't stay," blathered Mrs. Tiger. I just want to ask you what you think of the jaguar that's come to the seacoast.

"I really don't know," declaimed Miss Hog. "I didn't know about any jaguar. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," vowed Mrs. Tiger nicely. "I heard that this jaguar likes to flatten oriental vases."

"Um, I don't know what to say," cajoled Miss Hog, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Tiger, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the seacoast when we get a lot of jaguars flattening oriental vases?"

"I can't imagine," sniped Miss Hog.

"What are we going to do about it?" proposed Mrs. Tiger.

"Appoint a committee?" tittered Miss Hog, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Tiger had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Tiger fiercely. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," mouthed Miss Hog cautiously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Tiger solemnly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," whimpered Miss Hog sleepily, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the display case on her front porch, looking out over the seacoast and chuckling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Tiger. Do come again."

"Just a minute," rumored Mrs. Tiger sorrowfully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Hog thought she had answered, and was beginning to get jaunty. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Tiger doing these days?"

Mrs. Tiger would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Hog sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied glumly.