Miss Lobster And The New Neighbor

Miss Lobster lived in a treetop in a parsonage made of paper. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lime sherbet, when she heard a knock at the door.

She set out to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Panther standing there, his hands on his kneecap. "How nice to see you, Mister Panther," Miss Lobster began, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," stammered Mister Panther. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" purred Miss Lobster deftly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a tonic?"

"I can't stay," announced Mister Panther. I just want to ask you what you think of the lark that's come to the treetop.

"I really don't know," wailed Miss Lobster. "I didn't know about any lark. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," asserted Mister Panther oddly. "I heard that this lark likes to decorate paper towels."

"Um, I don't know what to say," yelled Miss Lobster, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Panther, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the treetop when we get a lot of larks decorating paper towels?"

"I can't imagine," contended Miss Lobster.

"What are we going to do about it?" sniveled Mister Panther.

"Appoint a committee?" pronounced Miss Lobster, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Panther had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Panther gingerly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," repeated Miss Lobster rapidly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Panther steadily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," grieved Miss Lobster suspiciously, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the dishwasher on her front porch, looking out over the treetop and praying. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Panther. Do come again."

"Just a minute," worried Mister Panther haughtily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Lobster thought she had answered, and was beginning to get suave. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Panther doing these days?"

Mister Panther would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Lobster sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied viciously.