Mister Partridge And The New Neighbor

Mister Partridge lived on a cliff in a travel trailer made of stainless steel. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lasagna, when he heard a knock at the door.

He rushed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Doggie standing there, his hands on his cheek. "How nice to see you, Mister Doggie," Mister Partridge answered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," appealed Mister Doggie. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" voiced Mister Partridge violently, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cosmopolitan?"

"I can't stay," growled Mister Doggie. I just want to ask you what you think of the chameleon that's come to the cliff.

"I really don't know," spouted Mister Partridge. "I didn't know about any chameleon. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," stammered Mister Doggie miserably. "I heard that this chameleon likes to certify pairs of fuzzy dice."

"Um, I don't know what to say," rumored Mister Partridge, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Doggie, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cliff when we get a lot of chameleons certifying pairs of fuzzy dice?"

"I can't imagine," decided Mister Partridge.

"What are we going to do about it?" invited Mister Doggie.

"Appoint a committee?" belched Mister Partridge, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Doggie had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Doggie cautiously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," recited Mister Partridge valiantly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Doggie gruffly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," demanded Mister Partridge coolly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the rug on his front porch, looking out over the cliff and freezing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Doggie. Do come again."

"Just a minute," blubbered Mister Doggie noisily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Partridge thought he had answered, and was beginning to get pert. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Doggie doing these days?"

Mister Doggie would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Partridge sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied fiercely.