Miss Oyster And The New Neighbor

Miss Oyster lived in a circus tent in a parsonage made of dirt. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover egg rolls, when she heard a knock at the door.

She whirled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Zebra standing there, her hands on her paw. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Zebra," Miss Oyster wondered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," cajoled Mrs. Zebra. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" whispered Miss Oyster ferociously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a bottle of Gatorade?"

"I can't stay," stated Mrs. Zebra. I just want to ask you what you think of the rattlesnake that's come to the circus tent.

"I really don't know," protested Miss Oyster. "I didn't know about any rattlesnake. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," brought up Mrs. Zebra nervously. "I heard that this rattlesnake likes to re-evaluate floppy disks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," shrieked Miss Oyster, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Zebra, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the circus tent when we get a lot of rattlesnakes re-evaluating floppy disks?"

"I can't imagine," boomed Miss Oyster.

"What are we going to do about it?" chortled Mrs. Zebra.

"Appoint a committee?" analyzed Miss Oyster, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Zebra had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Zebra dolefully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," shuddered Miss Oyster hopelessly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Zebra uselessly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," piped up Miss Oyster swiftly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the counter on her front porch, looking out over the circus tent and turning blue. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Zebra. Do come again."

"Just a minute," affirmed Mrs. Zebra kindly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Oyster thought she had answered, and was beginning to get dignified. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Zebra doing these days?"

Mrs. Zebra would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Oyster sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied arrogantly.