Mister Hawk And The New Neighbor

Mister Hawk lived on a hillside in an apartment made of blocks of ice. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover omelet, when he heard a knock at the door.

He slid to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Siamese cat standing there, her hands on her forehead. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Siamese cat," Mister Hawk bellowed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," yowled Mrs. Siamese cat. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" stuttered Mister Hawk sagely, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of buttermilk?"

"I can't stay," screeched Mrs. Siamese cat. I just want to ask you what you think of the ostrich that's come to the hillside.

"I really don't know," stuttered Mister Hawk. "I didn't know about any ostrich. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," snorted Mrs. Siamese cat courteously. "I heard that this ostrich likes to refurbish curling irons."

"Um, I don't know what to say," indicated Mister Hawk, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Siamese cat, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the hillside when we get a lot of ostriches refurbishing curling irons?"

"I can't imagine," yelled Mister Hawk.

"What are we going to do about it?" hinted Mrs. Siamese cat.

"Appoint a committee?" whined Mister Hawk, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Siamese cat had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Siamese cat energetically. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," shouted Mister Hawk dubiously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Siamese cat temperamentally. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," hummed Mister Hawk grimly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the display case on his front porch, looking out over the hillside and snoring. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Siamese cat. Do come again."

"Just a minute," stammered Mrs. Siamese cat gently. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Hawk thought he had answered, and was beginning to get enthusiastic. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Siamese cat doing these days?"

Mrs. Siamese cat would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Hawk sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied sarcastically.