Mister Mink And The New Neighbor

Mister Mink lived on a mountain in an office made of antimatter. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover smoked salmon, when he heard a knock at the door.

He jumped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Weasel standing there, his hands on his waist. "How nice to see you, Mister Weasel," Mister Mink interrupted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," fumed Mister Weasel. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" hinted Mister Mink fearlessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a soda?"

"I can't stay," burbled Mister Weasel. I just want to ask you what you think of the gnu that's come to the mountain.

"I really don't know," indicated Mister Mink. "I didn't know about any gnu. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," purred Mister Weasel carefully. "I heard that this gnu likes to wash fossils."

"Um, I don't know what to say," spoke up Mister Mink, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Weasel, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the mountain when we get a lot of gnus washing fossils?"

"I can't imagine," explained Mister Mink.

"What are we going to do about it?" interrupted Mister Weasel.

"Appoint a committee?" fantasized Mister Mink, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Weasel had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Weasel sweetly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," wondered Mister Mink threateningly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Weasel strictly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," groveled Mister Mink sweetly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the card table on his front porch, looking out over the mountain and inhaling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Weasel. Do come again."

"Just a minute," quoted Mister Weasel delicately. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Mink thought he had answered, and was beginning to get cuddly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Weasel doing these days?"

Mister Weasel would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Mink sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied sleepily.