Miss Groundhog And The New Neighbor

Miss Groundhog lived at a dump in a motor home made of gold bricks. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover strawberry shortcake, when she heard a knock at the door.

She swaggered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Doberman standing there, her hands on her big toe. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Doberman," Miss Groundhog sniped, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," quoted Mrs. Doberman. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" rambled Miss Groundhog coldly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a fruit smoothie?"

"I can't stay," thought Mrs. Doberman. I just want to ask you what you think of the bandicoot that's come to the dump.

"I really don't know," joked Miss Groundhog. "I didn't know about any bandicoot. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," pointed out Mrs. Doberman demurely. "I heard that this bandicoot likes to smash books."

"Um, I don't know what to say," whimpered Miss Groundhog, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Doberman, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the dump when we get a lot of bandicoots smashing books?"

"I can't imagine," voiced Miss Groundhog.

"What are we going to do about it?" spouted Mrs. Doberman.

"Appoint a committee?" panted Miss Groundhog, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Doberman had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Doberman brightly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," protested Miss Groundhog quickly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Doberman tearfully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," ranted Miss Groundhog lightly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the hamper on her front porch, looking out over the dump and dreaming. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Doberman. Do come again."

"Just a minute," growled Mrs. Doberman cheerfully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Groundhog thought she had answered, and was beginning to get miniscule. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Doberman doing these days?"

Mrs. Doberman would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Groundhog sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied jokingly.