Miss Salamander And The New Neighbor

Miss Salamander lived in a rainforest in a mud hut made of maple. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tuna casserole, when she heard a knock at the door.

She tore to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Dormouse standing there, her hands on her aorta. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Dormouse," Miss Salamander articulated, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," grunted Mrs. Dormouse. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" said Miss Salamander tensely, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Seven and Seven?"

"I can't stay," smirked Mrs. Dormouse. I just want to ask you what you think of the sasquatch that's come to the rainforest.

"I really don't know," announced Miss Salamander. "I didn't know about any sasquatch. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," stuttered Mrs. Dormouse blindly. "I heard that this sasquatch likes to shrink duffel bags."

"Um, I don't know what to say," swore Miss Salamander, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Dormouse, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the rainforest when we get a lot of sasquatches shrinking duffel bags?"

"I can't imagine," sighed Miss Salamander.

"What are we going to do about it?" began Mrs. Dormouse.

"Appoint a committee?" added Miss Salamander, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Dormouse had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Dormouse quietly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," stormed Miss Salamander quickly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Dormouse uneasily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," queried Miss Salamander peevishly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the canopy bed on her front porch, looking out over the rainforest and scratching. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Dormouse. Do come again."

"Just a minute," avowed Mrs. Dormouse bravely. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Salamander thought she had answered, and was beginning to get prickly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Dormouse doing these days?"

Mrs. Dormouse would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Salamander sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied courageously.