Mister Mare And The New Neighbor

Mister Mare lived on a prairie in a wikiup made of denim. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover clam chowder, when he heard a knock at the door.

He slithered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Dromedary standing there, her hands on her waist. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Dromedary," Mister Mare roared, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," invited Mrs. Dromedary. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" simpered Mister Mare boisterously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a bottle of Gatorade?"

"I can't stay," instructed Mrs. Dromedary. I just want to ask you what you think of the hamster that's come to the prairie.

"I really don't know," commented Mister Mare. "I didn't know about any hamster. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," yelled Mrs. Dromedary testily. "I heard that this hamster likes to categorize bells."

"Um, I don't know what to say," railed Mister Mare, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Dromedary, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the prairie when we get a lot of hamsters categorizing bells?"

"I can't imagine," acknowledged Mister Mare.

"What are we going to do about it?" fantasized Mrs. Dromedary.

"Appoint a committee?" snarled Mister Mare, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Dromedary had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Dromedary suddenly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," giggled Mister Mare hopelessly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Dromedary swiftly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," expressed Mister Mare sadly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the armoire on his front porch, looking out over the prairie and sneezing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Dromedary. Do come again."

"Just a minute," boomed Mrs. Dromedary again. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Mare thought he had answered, and was beginning to get high-strung. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Dromedary doing these days?"

Mrs. Dromedary would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Mare sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied pityingly.