Mister Cocker Spaniel And The New Neighbor

Mister Cocker spaniel lived in a dumpster in a bungalow made of plasma. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tuna casserole, when he heard a knock at the door.

He waded to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Mountain goat standing there, her hands on her foot. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Mountain goat," Mister Cocker spaniel gabbed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," gasped Mrs. Mountain goat. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" expressed Mister Cocker spaniel woefully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a whiskey sour?"

"I can't stay," snarled Mrs. Mountain goat. I just want to ask you what you think of the pig that's come to the dumpster.

"I really don't know," sneered Mister Cocker spaniel. "I didn't know about any pig. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," instructed Mrs. Mountain goat gruffly. "I heard that this pig likes to inflate iPads."

"Um, I don't know what to say," suggested Mister Cocker spaniel, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Mountain goat, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the dumpster when we get a lot of pigs inflating iPads?"

"I can't imagine," blurted Mister Cocker spaniel.

"What are we going to do about it?" hinted Mrs. Mountain goat.

"Appoint a committee?" alleged Mister Cocker spaniel, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Mountain goat had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Mountain goat positively. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," smiled Mister Cocker spaniel menacingly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Mountain goat carelessly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," opined Mister Cocker spaniel hastily, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the counter on his front porch, looking out over the dumpster and scratching. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Mountain goat. Do come again."

"Just a minute," exploded Mrs. Mountain goat wearily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Cocker spaniel thought he had answered, and was beginning to get dreadful. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Mountain goat doing these days?"

Mrs. Mountain goat would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Cocker spaniel sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied quickly.