Miss Dragon And The New Neighbor

Miss Dragon lived in a cornfield in an office made of papier-mâché. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover macaroni, when she heard a knock at the door.

She jumped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Gila monster standing there, her hands on her tooth. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Gila monster," Miss Dragon jeered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," declared Mrs. Gila monster. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" squawked Miss Dragon brightly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of champagne?"

"I can't stay," intoned Mrs. Gila monster. I just want to ask you what you think of the monkey that's come to the cornfield.

"I really don't know," spat Miss Dragon. "I didn't know about any monkey. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," sniffed Mrs. Gila monster wildly. "I heard that this monkey likes to kick toilet seats."

"Um, I don't know what to say," professed Miss Dragon, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Gila monster, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cornfield when we get a lot of monkeys kicking toilet seats?"

"I can't imagine," vowed Miss Dragon.

"What are we going to do about it?" inquired Mrs. Gila monster.

"Appoint a committee?" stuttered Miss Dragon, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Gila monster had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Gila monster positively. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," groveled Miss Dragon primly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Gila monster solemnly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," quoted Miss Dragon recklessly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the windowsill on her front porch, looking out over the cornfield and rolling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Gila monster. Do come again."

"Just a minute," suggested Mrs. Gila monster uselessly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Dragon thought she had answered, and was beginning to get somber. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Gila monster doing these days?"

Mrs. Gila monster would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Dragon sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied needlessly.