Mister Partridge And The New Neighbor

Mister Partridge lived in a pasture in a travel trailer made of wicker. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover crumb cake, when he heard a knock at the door.

He scurried to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Mountain goat standing there, his hands on his artery. "How nice to see you, Mister Mountain goat," Mister Partridge begged, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," giggled Mister Mountain goat. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" protested Mister Partridge carelessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of buttermilk?"

"I can't stay," quavered Mister Mountain goat. I just want to ask you what you think of the gila monster that's come to the pasture.

"I really don't know," trumpeted Mister Partridge. "I didn't know about any gila monster. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," babbled Mister Mountain goat greedily. "I heard that this gila monster likes to flatten parlor tricks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," cackled Mister Partridge, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Mountain goat, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the pasture when we get a lot of gila monsters flattening parlor tricks?"

"I can't imagine," vouched Mister Partridge.

"What are we going to do about it?" pleaded Mister Mountain goat.

"Appoint a committee?" fumed Mister Partridge, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Mountain goat had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Mountain goat strictly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," fumed Mister Partridge victoriously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Mountain goat narrowly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," imitated Mister Partridge neatly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the billiard table on his front porch, looking out over the pasture and wincing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Mountain goat. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chortled Mister Mountain goat dolefully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Partridge thought he had answered, and was beginning to get muddled. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Mountain goat doing these days?"

Mister Mountain goat would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Partridge sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied zestily.