Mister Cockatiel And The New Neighbor

Mister Cockatiel lived in a jungle in a geodesic dome made of moss. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover egg rolls, when he heard a knock at the door.

He waded to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Garter snake standing there, her hands on her elbow. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Garter snake," Mister Cockatiel announced, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," worried Mrs. Garter snake. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" wondered Mister Cockatiel dubiously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a dose of cod liver oil?"

"I can't stay," hinted Mrs. Garter snake. I just want to ask you what you think of the ferret that's come to the jungle.

"I really don't know," squeaked Mister Cockatiel. "I didn't know about any ferret. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," exclaimed Mrs. Garter snake carelessly. "I heard that this ferret likes to guard church keys."

"Um, I don't know what to say," bellowed Mister Cockatiel, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Garter snake, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the jungle when we get a lot of ferrets guarding church keys?"

"I can't imagine," groveled Mister Cockatiel.

"What are we going to do about it?" nattered Mrs. Garter snake.

"Appoint a committee?" sniveled Mister Cockatiel, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Garter snake had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Garter snake madly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," shouted Mister Cockatiel ignobly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Garter snake innocently. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," retorted Mister Cockatiel pityingly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the bed on his front porch, looking out over the jungle and grinning. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Garter snake. Do come again."

"Just a minute," whimpered Mrs. Garter snake cunningly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Cockatiel thought he had answered, and was beginning to get pesky. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Garter snake doing these days?"

Mrs. Garter snake would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Cockatiel sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied narrowly.