Miss Reindeer And The New Neighbor

Miss Reindeer lived at a lakeside in a Cape Cod made of ceramic. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover popcorn, when she heard a knock at the door.

She skittered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Honeybee standing there, his hands on his bladder. "How nice to see you, Mister Honeybee," Miss Reindeer divulged, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," called Mister Honeybee. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" prattled Miss Reindeer nonchalantly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of orange juice?"

"I can't stay," guessed Mister Honeybee. I just want to ask you what you think of the monster that's come to the lakeside.

"I really don't know," complained Miss Reindeer. "I didn't know about any monster. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," spat Mister Honeybee smoothly. "I heard that this monster likes to package paintings."

"Um, I don't know what to say," chuckled Miss Reindeer, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Honeybee, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the lakeside when we get a lot of monsters packaging paintings?"

"I can't imagine," simpered Miss Reindeer.

"What are we going to do about it?" instructed Mister Honeybee.

"Appoint a committee?" added Miss Reindeer, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Honeybee had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Honeybee slowly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," boomed Miss Reindeer unnaturally, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Honeybee noisily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," yelled Miss Reindeer sharply, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the billiard table on her front porch, looking out over the lakeside and slobbering. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Honeybee. Do come again."

"Just a minute," rebutted Mister Honeybee despondently. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Reindeer thought she had answered, and was beginning to get obese. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Honeybee doing these days?"

Mister Honeybee would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Reindeer sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied hungrily.