Mister Deer And The New Neighbor

Mister Deer lived in a badlands area in a cardboard box made of clay. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover prime rib, when he heard a knock at the door.

He inched to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Crocodile standing there, her hands on her pinky. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Crocodile," Mister Deer recited, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," wailed Mrs. Crocodile. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" acknowledged Mister Deer charmingly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a whiskey sour?"

"I can't stay," lamented Mrs. Crocodile. I just want to ask you what you think of the badger that's come to the badlands area.

"I really don't know," inquired Mister Deer. "I didn't know about any badger. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," simpered Mrs. Crocodile briskly. "I heard that this badger likes to harden cardboard boxes."

"Um, I don't know what to say," groveled Mister Deer, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Crocodile, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the badlands area when we get a lot of badgers hardening cardboard boxes?"

"I can't imagine," babbled Mister Deer.

"What are we going to do about it?" continued Mrs. Crocodile.

"Appoint a committee?" debated Mister Deer, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Crocodile had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Crocodile repeatedly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," recited Mister Deer ingeniously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Crocodile joyously. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," announced Mister Deer miserably, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the counter on his front porch, looking out over the badlands area and rolling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Crocodile. Do come again."

"Just a minute," asserted Mrs. Crocodile awkwardly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Deer thought he had answered, and was beginning to get bubbly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Crocodile doing these days?"

Mrs. Crocodile would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Deer sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied frenetically.