Miss Dachshund And The New Neighbor

Miss Dachshund lived on a wasteland in a yurt made of bark. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover bread and butter, when she heard a knock at the door.

She trekked to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Ring-tailed lemur standing there, his hands on his femur. "How nice to see you, Mister Ring-tailed lemur," Miss Dachshund rebutted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," continued Mister Ring-tailed lemur. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" breathed Miss Dachshund ferociously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a fruit smoothie?"

"I can't stay," moaned Mister Ring-tailed lemur. I just want to ask you what you think of the seal that's come to the wasteland.

"I really don't know," retorted Miss Dachshund. "I didn't know about any seal. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," intimated Mister Ring-tailed lemur fondly. "I heard that this seal likes to sharpen shoes."

"Um, I don't know what to say," harangued Miss Dachshund, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Ring-tailed lemur, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the wasteland when we get a lot of seals sharpening shoes?"

"I can't imagine," exploded Miss Dachshund.

"What are we going to do about it?" uttered Mister Ring-tailed lemur.

"Appoint a committee?" thought Miss Dachshund, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Ring-tailed lemur had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Ring-tailed lemur later. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," barked Miss Dachshund joyously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Ring-tailed lemur despondently. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," thought Miss Dachshund cleverly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the toilet on her front porch, looking out over the wasteland and dawdling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Ring-tailed lemur. Do come again."

"Just a minute," invited Mister Ring-tailed lemur slowly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Dachshund thought she had answered, and was beginning to get vile. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Ring-tailed lemur doing these days?"

Mister Ring-tailed lemur would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Dachshund sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied cleverly.