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Miss Doberman And The New Neighbor


Miss Doberman lived in a pond in a wigwam made of chocolate. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover beef bouillon, when she heard a knock at the door.

She zoomed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.


She was surprised to see Mister Hippopotamus standing there, his hands on his adrenal gland. "How nice to see you, Mister Hippopotamus," Miss Doberman trumpeted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," reminded Mister Hippopotamus. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" squealed Miss Doberman uselessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a 7-Up?"

"I can't stay," mouthed Mister Hippopotamus. I just want to ask you what you think of the beetle that's come to the pond.


"I really don't know," hollered Miss Doberman. "I didn't know about any beetle. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," bawled Mister Hippopotamus calmly. "I heard that this beetle likes to shellac teacups."

"Um, I don't know what to say," announced Miss Doberman, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Hippopotamus, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the pond when we get a lot of beetles shellacking teacups?"

"I can't imagine," reasoned Miss Doberman.

"What are we going to do about it?" argued Mister Hippopotamus.

"Appoint a committee?" judged Miss Doberman, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Hippopotamus had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Hippopotamus coldly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," vowed Miss Doberman delicately, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Hippopotamus gracefully. "You always have such good ideas."

bar stool

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," imitated Miss Doberman sagely, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the bar stool on her front porch, looking out over the pond and scribbling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Hippopotamus. Do come again."

"Just a minute," yowled Mister Hippopotamus fearlessly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Doberman thought she had answered, and was beginning to get repulsive. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Hippopotamus doing these days?"

Mister Hippopotamus would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Doberman sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied stupidly.