Mister Snipe And The New Neighbor

Mister Snipe lived on a steppe in a farmhouse made of stardust. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover Cheerios, when he heard a knock at the door.

He strode to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Chihuahua standing there, his hands on his dignity. "How nice to see you, Mister Chihuahua," Mister Snipe peeped, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," acknowledged Mister Chihuahua. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" quoted Mister Snipe uselessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of espresso?"

"I can't stay," breathed Mister Chihuahua. I just want to ask you what you think of the shrew that's come to the steppe.

"I really don't know," smirked Mister Snipe. "I didn't know about any shrew. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," pleaded Mister Chihuahua effortlessly. "I heard that this shrew likes to slash padlocks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," orated Mister Snipe, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Chihuahua, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the steppe when we get a lot of shrews slashing padlocks?"

"I can't imagine," affirmed Mister Snipe.

"What are we going to do about it?" snorted Mister Chihuahua.

"Appoint a committee?" snorted Mister Snipe, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Chihuahua had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Chihuahua accidentally. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," cackled Mister Snipe nimbly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Chihuahua sympathetically. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," screamed Mister Snipe nervously, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the toilet on his front porch, looking out over the steppe and chattering. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Chihuahua. Do come again."

"Just a minute," insisted Mister Chihuahua nervously. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Snipe thought he had answered, and was beginning to get idiotic. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Chihuahua doing these days?"

Mister Chihuahua would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Snipe sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied victoriously.