Mister Brine Shrimp And The New Neighbor

Mister Brine shrimp lived on a seacoast in a cottage made of Kevlar. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover egg rolls, when he heard a knock at the door.

He stalked to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Jackal standing there, his hands on his kidney. "How nice to see you, Mister Jackal," Mister Brine shrimp imitated, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," winked Mister Jackal. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" said Mister Brine shrimp despondently, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a chocolate milk?"

"I can't stay," groaned Mister Jackal. I just want to ask you what you think of the toad that's come to the seacoast.

"I really don't know," trumpeted Mister Brine shrimp. "I didn't know about any toad. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," chattered Mister Jackal haughtily. "I heard that this toad likes to throw stacks of papers."

"Um, I don't know what to say," hissed Mister Brine shrimp, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Jackal, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the seacoast when we get a lot of toads throwing stacks of papers?"

"I can't imagine," fantasized Mister Brine shrimp.

"What are we going to do about it?" fumed Mister Jackal.

"Appoint a committee?" amended Mister Brine shrimp, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Jackal had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Jackal smoothly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," complained Mister Brine shrimp resignedly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Jackal positively. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," remarked Mister Brine shrimp thoughtfully, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the TV on his front porch, looking out over the seacoast and snuffling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Jackal. Do come again."

"Just a minute," grieved Mister Jackal jokingly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Brine shrimp thought he had answered, and was beginning to get serious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Jackal doing these days?"

Mister Jackal would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Brine shrimp sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied tensely.