Miss Hog And The New Neighbor

Miss Hog lived on a grassy knoll in a monastery made of brick. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover enchiladas, when she heard a knock at the door.

She zoomed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Beagle standing there, her hands on her abdomen. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Beagle," Miss Hog rumored, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," uttered Mrs. Beagle. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" sneered Miss Hog numbly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a chocolate milk?"

"I can't stay," burbled Mrs. Beagle. I just want to ask you what you think of the panther that's come to the grassy knoll.

"I really don't know," squawked Miss Hog. "I didn't know about any panther. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," sputtered Mrs. Beagle hastily. "I heard that this panther likes to blame pairs of headphones."

"Um, I don't know what to say," grieved Miss Hog, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Beagle, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the grassy knoll when we get a lot of panthers blaming pairs of headphones?"

"I can't imagine," mumbled Miss Hog.

"What are we going to do about it?" rambled Mrs. Beagle.

"Appoint a committee?" uttered Miss Hog, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Beagle had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Beagle lovingly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," cried Miss Hog sympathetically, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Beagle caustically. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," blurted Miss Hog pitifully, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the ottoman on her front porch, looking out over the grassy knoll and crouching. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Beagle. Do come again."

"Just a minute," affirmed Mrs. Beagle deliberately. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Hog thought she had answered, and was beginning to get sophisticated. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Beagle doing these days?"

Mrs. Beagle would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Hog sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied openly.