Miss Cocker Spaniel And The New Neighbor

Miss Cocker spaniel lived on a hillside in a Victorian mansion made of plasma. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover sweet potatoes, when she heard a knock at the door.

She sallied forth to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Mustang standing there, his hands on his rib. "How nice to see you, Mister Mustang," Miss Cocker spaniel responded, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," declaimed Mister Mustang. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" squeaked Miss Cocker spaniel carelessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Harvey Wallbanger?"

"I can't stay," persisted Mister Mustang. I just want to ask you what you think of the squirrel that's come to the hillside.

"I really don't know," revealed Miss Cocker spaniel. "I didn't know about any squirrel. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," announced Mister Mustang sorrowfully. "I heard that this squirrel likes to paint wrenches."

"Um, I don't know what to say," recited Miss Cocker spaniel, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Mustang, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the hillside when we get a lot of squirrels painting wrenches?"

"I can't imagine," instructed Miss Cocker spaniel.

"What are we going to do about it?" persisted Mister Mustang.

"Appoint a committee?" intimated Miss Cocker spaniel, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Mustang had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Mustang elatedly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," winked Miss Cocker spaniel intensely, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Mustang shakily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," roared Miss Cocker spaniel truculently, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the bed on her front porch, looking out over the hillside and vomiting. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Mustang. Do come again."

"Just a minute," stormed Mister Mustang suddenly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Cocker spaniel thought she had answered, and was beginning to get weary. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Mustang doing these days?"

Mister Mustang would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Cocker spaniel sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied slyly.