Mister Shark And The New Neighbor

Mister Shark lived in a valley in a spa made of bark. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover brownies, when he heard a knock at the door.

He blundered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Pelican standing there, her hands on her thumb. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Pelican," Mister Shark barked, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," snorted Mrs. Pelican. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" reminded Mister Shark dubiously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Dr. Pepper?"

"I can't stay," added Mrs. Pelican. I just want to ask you what you think of the duck that's come to the valley.

"I really don't know," chanted Mister Shark. "I didn't know about any duck. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," noted Mrs. Pelican arrogantly. "I heard that this duck likes to scuff floppy disks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," blustered Mister Shark, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Pelican, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the valley when we get a lot of ducks scuffing floppy disks?"

"I can't imagine," affirmed Mister Shark.

"What are we going to do about it?" rambled Mrs. Pelican.

"Appoint a committee?" alleged Mister Shark, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Pelican had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Pelican warmly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," suggested Mister Shark surreptitiously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Pelican excitedly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," crooned Mister Shark madly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the end table on his front porch, looking out over the valley and passing out. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Pelican. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chortled Mrs. Pelican frantically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Shark thought he had answered, and was beginning to get bizarre. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Pelican doing these days?"

Mrs. Pelican would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Shark sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied brashly.