Mister Puppy And The New Neighbor

Mister Puppy lived on a peninsula in a convent made of hair. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tortillas, when he heard a knock at the door.

He flounced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Chameleon standing there, her hands on her throat. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Chameleon," Mister Puppy rebutted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," explained Mrs. Chameleon. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" lamented Mister Puppy daringly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a bottle of rum?"

"I can't stay," screeched Mrs. Chameleon. I just want to ask you what you think of the lovebird that's come to the peninsula.

"I really don't know," blubbered Mister Puppy. "I didn't know about any lovebird. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," mused Mrs. Chameleon caustically. "I heard that this lovebird likes to slap stopwatches."

"Um, I don't know what to say," stuttered Mister Puppy, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Chameleon, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the peninsula when we get a lot of lovebirds slapping stopwatches?"

"I can't imagine," exclaimed Mister Puppy.

"What are we going to do about it?" debated Mrs. Chameleon.

"Appoint a committee?" asked Mister Puppy, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Chameleon had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Chameleon fearlessly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," wondered Mister Puppy courteously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Chameleon merrily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," noted Mister Puppy majestically, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the dining table on his front porch, looking out over the peninsula and playing solitaire. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Chameleon. Do come again."

"Just a minute," enunciated Mrs. Chameleon diligently. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Puppy thought he had answered, and was beginning to get puzzled. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Chameleon doing these days?"

Mrs. Chameleon would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Puppy sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied calmly.