Miss Guinea Pig And The New Neighbor

Miss Guinea pig lived in a marsh in a mud hut made of sawdust. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover potatoes and gravy, when she heard a knock at the door.

She straggled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Weasel standing there, her hands on her eyelash. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Weasel," Miss Guinea pig clarified, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," fretted Mrs. Weasel. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" gabbed Miss Guinea pig urgently, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Dr. Pepper?"

"I can't stay," informed Mrs. Weasel. I just want to ask you what you think of the honeybee that's come to the marsh.

"I really don't know," professed Miss Guinea pig. "I didn't know about any honeybee. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," repeated Mrs. Weasel languidly. "I heard that this honeybee likes to hack business cards."

"Um, I don't know what to say," emphasized Miss Guinea pig, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Weasel, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the marsh when we get a lot of honeybees hacking business cards?"

"I can't imagine," questioned Miss Guinea pig.

"What are we going to do about it?" moaned Mrs. Weasel.

"Appoint a committee?" spewed Miss Guinea pig, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Weasel had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Weasel viciously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," spoke up Miss Guinea pig excitedly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Weasel temperamentally. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," scoffed Miss Guinea pig coldly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the cushion on her front porch, looking out over the marsh and flailing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Weasel. Do come again."

"Just a minute," muttered Mrs. Weasel fearfully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Guinea pig thought she had answered, and was beginning to get ungainly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Weasel doing these days?"

Mrs. Weasel would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Guinea pig sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied warily.