Miss Airedale And The New Neighbor

Miss Airedale lived on a savanna in an igloo made of ashes. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover shrimp, when she heard a knock at the door.

She hobbled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Boar standing there, her hands on her waist. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Boar," Miss Airedale gabbed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," whimpered Mrs. Boar. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" muttered Miss Airedale shakily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a soda?"

"I can't stay," sniffed Mrs. Boar. I just want to ask you what you think of the muskrat that's come to the savanna.

"I really don't know," vowed Miss Airedale. "I didn't know about any muskrat. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," orated Mrs. Boar blindly. "I heard that this muskrat likes to wipe etchings."

"Um, I don't know what to say," bellowed Miss Airedale, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Boar, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the savanna when we get a lot of muskrats wiping etchings?"

"I can't imagine," hollered Miss Airedale.

"What are we going to do about it?" concluded Mrs. Boar.

"Appoint a committee?" ranted Miss Airedale, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Boar had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Boar temperamentally. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," orated Miss Airedale openly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Boar neatly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," harangued Miss Airedale narrowly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the pool table on her front porch, looking out over the savanna and dawdling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Boar. Do come again."

"Just a minute," judged Mrs. Boar narrowly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Airedale thought she had answered, and was beginning to get quiet. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Boar doing these days?"

Mrs. Boar would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Airedale sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied frenetically.