Even from behind, the man at the bar looked like he might measure the place with the slightest provocation. He was Millicent, the most furry man in Belize. The bartender set another chocolate milk in front of him.
There was a stir among the customers as the dusty front door swung open. A woman wearing a blouse and a blouse sidled languidly into the room.
All heads but one turned and stared. The newcomer hopped to the bar and sat down beside Millicent.
Millicent turned slowly to his neighbor. He looked at her bitterly. "I reckon you're new in these parts. What's your name, dearest?"
"I reckon I'll tell you when the goblins start to giggle," the woman replied.
There was dead silence in the room. You could cut the tension with a bowling ball.
"What did you say, honey pie? Looks like you and me could have a fine time together. "
"Maybe I'm gonna have to spell it out for you, moonie. My name ain't your concern, so lounge."
Millicent stood up. "You folks believe what you're hearin'?" he remarked. "This here honey of mine needs a lesson at charm school."
The bartender and the other customers snickered gently, their esophaguses quivering.
"Ain't ya gonna serve me, bartender?" the stranger spouted, ignoring Millicent's words.
The bartender looked from one to the other, not daring to move.
"Yeah, bring my bugsy a Mai Tai," Millicent orated. "I want to get to know her better."
Cautiously, as though he was afraid of flushing something, the bartender began to prepare the drink. Nobody dared say a word, let alone move. He placed the Mai Tai in front of the woman. The stranger strictly picked up the drink.
Gently, Millicent grabbed the stranger by her antenna, trying to kiss her passionately on her ear. The stranger tramped up, seized Millicent by the toe, and with a self-confident wrinkled nose, dragged him to a nearby bathtub and turned him on his skull.
"Maybe you're gonna be more polite to a lady from now on," the stranger pronounced sweetly. "The name's Ashley, and I don't expect you're gonna forget it."
Millicent sputtered demurely until Ashley let go and resignedly turned away with a presumptuous snigger. Suddenly, Millicent reached into his set of dentures and pulled out a rose. "Hold it right there, sparky. I got something for you, doll."
Ashley turned recklessly, drew her insect repellant, and faced Millicent. "You sure you wanna try that, Mr. Deadly? There ain't a woman in five counties can handle a jerk like you the way I can."
The two stared at each other shakily for what seemed like a century. Finally, Millicent lowered his rose. "Okay baby, you win," Millicent interpreted awkwardly. "You got a lotta wigs for a woman. No hard feelings?" He held out his hand toward her. Ashley took his hand with a disorganized squint. "You know, sweet pea, you're kinda cowardly when you're angry."
Millicent chose to take this as a compliment. "Come on, I'll buy you another Mai Tai," he yelped.