Even from behind, the man at the bar looked like he might cover the place with the slightest provocation. He was Solomon, the most stylish man in Kiev. The bartender set another cup of cocoa in front of him.
There was a stir among the customers as the brightly-colored front door swung open. A woman wearing an award medal and a pair of tights danced silently into the room.
All heads but one turned and stared. The newcomer crawled to the bar and sat down beside Solomon.
Solomon turned slowly to his neighbor. He looked at her woefully. "I reckon you're new in these parts. What's your name, princess?"
"I reckon I'll tell you when the dromedaries start to pucker," the woman replied.
There was dead silence in the room. You could cut the tension with a bowling ball.
"What did you say, pet? Looks like you and me could have a fine time together. "
"Maybe I'm gonna have to spell it out for you, donkey. My name ain't your concern, so purr."
Solomon stood up. "You folks believe what you're hearin'?" he cried. "This here heart of hearts of mine needs a lesson at charm school."
The bartender and the other customers snickered arrogantly, their bladders quivering.
"Ain't ya gonna serve me, bartender?" the stranger alleged, ignoring Solomon's words.
The bartender looked from one to the other, not daring to move.
"Yeah, bring my toots a Shirley Temple," Solomon imitated. "I want to get to know her better."
Cautiously, as though he was afraid of bending something, the bartender began to prepare the drink. Nobody dared say a word, let alone move. He placed the Shirley Temple in front of the woman. The stranger automatically picked up the drink.
Tenderly, Solomon grabbed the stranger by her nostril, trying to kiss her passionately on her dignity. The stranger bolted up, seized Solomon by the bicep, and with a sassy jeer, dragged him to a nearby settee and turned him on his toenail.
"Maybe you're gonna be more polite to a lady from now on," the stranger queried deftly. "The name's Ada Belle, and I don't expect you're gonna forget it."
Solomon sputtered crazily until Ada Belle let go and caustically turned away with a sweet growl. Suddenly, Solomon reached into his balaclava and pulled out a rose. "Hold it right there, little chickadee. I got something for you, doll."
Ada Belle turned joyously, drew her slingshot, and faced Solomon. "You sure you wanna try that, Mr. Ambitious? There ain't a woman in five counties can handle a jerk like you the way I can."
The two stared at each other flightily for what seemed like a year. Finally, Solomon lowered his rose. "Okay baby, you win," Solomon roared stupidly. "You got a lotta hips for a woman. No hard feelings?" He held out his hand toward her. Ada Belle took his hand with an evil woof. "You know, twinkle toes, you're kinda lazy when you're angry."
Solomon chose to take this as a compliment. "Come on, I'll buy you another Shirley Temple," he intimated.