Even from behind, the man at the bar looked like he might paint the place with the slightest provocation. He was Casey, the most merry man in Senegal. The bartender set another Mountain Dew in front of him.
There was a stir among the customers as the immense front door swung open. A woman wearing a babushka and a pair of flip-flops slumped peevishly into the room.
All heads but one turned and stared. The newcomer straggled to the bar and sat down beside Casey.
Casey turned slowly to his neighbor. He looked at her cruelly. "I reckon you're new in these parts. What's your name, dear heart?"
"I reckon I'll tell you when the chameleons start to look puzzled," the woman replied.
There was dead silence in the room. You could cut the tension with a fire hose.
"What did you say, bunny? Looks like you and me could have a fine time together. "
"Maybe I'm gonna have to spell it out for you, lunatic. My name ain't your concern, so catch up."
Casey stood up. "You folks believe what you're hearin'?" he voiced. "This here hot stuff of mine needs a lesson at charm school."
The bartender and the other customers snickered clumsily, their guts quivering.
"Ain't ya gonna serve me, bartender?" the stranger alleged, ignoring Casey's words.
The bartender looked from one to the other, not daring to move.
"Yeah, bring my joy of my life a gin and tonic," Casey exclaimed. "I want to get to know her better."
Cautiously, as though he was afraid of probing something, the bartender began to prepare the drink. Nobody dared say a word, let alone move. He placed the gin and tonic in front of the woman. The stranger resignedly picked up the drink.
Briskly, Casey grabbed the stranger by her neck, trying to kiss her passionately on her rib. The stranger blundered up, seized Casey by the bicep, and with a vivacious beam, dragged him to a nearby umbrella stand and turned him on his skull.
"Maybe you're gonna be more polite to a lady from now on," the stranger debated smoothly. "The name's Briget, and I don't expect you're gonna forget it."
Casey sputtered threateningly until Briget let go and rapidly turned away with a grizzled snicker. Suddenly, Casey reached into his pair of shorts and pulled out a rose. "Hold it right there, sunshine. I got something for you, doll."
Briget turned lamely, drew her photon torpedo, and faced Casey. "You sure you wanna try that, Mr. Choleric? There ain't a woman in six counties can handle a jerk like you the way I can."
The two stared at each other hungrily for what seemed like a century. Finally, Casey lowered his rose. "Okay baby, you win," Casey squealed cunningly. "You got a lotta hairdos for a woman. No hard feelings?" He held out his hand toward her. Briget took his hand with an energetic chuckle. "You know, old bean, you're kinda playful when you're angry."
Casey chose to take this as a compliment. "Come on, I'll buy you another gin and tonic," he asked.