Even from behind, the man at the bar looked like he might admire the place with the slightest provocation. He was Cliff, the most lanky man in Cyprus. The bartender set another Bacardi in front of him.
There was a stir among the customers as the ordinary front door swung open. A woman wearing a pair of cargo pants and a tool belt sprinted intensely into the room.
All heads but one turned and stared. The newcomer bounded to the bar and sat down beside Cliff.
Cliff turned slowly to his neighbor. He looked at her primly. "I reckon you're new in these parts. What's your name, doll?"
"I reckon I'll tell you when the computers start to wink," the woman replied.
There was dead silence in the room. You could cut the tension with a Band-aid.
"What did you say, sweetie-pie? Looks like you and me could have a fine time together. "
"Maybe I'm gonna have to spell it out for you, troublemaker. My name ain't your concern, so get frazzled."
Cliff stood up. "You folks believe what you're hearin'?" he spoke up. "This here Banana Cakes of mine needs a lesson at charm school."
The bartender and the other customers snickered violently, their pinkies quivering.
"Ain't ya gonna serve me, bartender?" the stranger began, ignoring Cliff's words.
The bartender looked from one to the other, not daring to move.
"Yeah, bring my nipkin a latte," Cliff nattered. "I want to get to know her better."
Cautiously, as though he was afraid of enshrining something, the bartender began to prepare the drink. Nobody dared say a word, let alone move. He placed the latte in front of the woman. The stranger shakily picked up the drink.
Valiantly, Cliff grabbed the stranger by her knee, trying to kiss her passionately on her nose. The stranger cantered up, seized Cliff by the antenna, and with a moody coo, dragged him to a nearby hope chest and turned him on his forehead.
"Maybe you're gonna be more polite to a lady from now on," the stranger divulged fondly. "The name's Marla, and I don't expect you're gonna forget it."
Cliff sputtered languidly until Marla let go and urgently turned away with a happy growl. Suddenly, Cliff reached into his smartwatch and pulled out a rose. "Hold it right there, honey bunch. I got something for you, doll."
Marla turned hopefully, drew her hockey puck, and faced Cliff. "You sure you wanna try that, Mr. Suave? There ain't a woman in two counties can handle a jerk like you the way I can."
The two stared at each other speedily for what seemed like a year. Finally, Cliff lowered his rose. "Okay baby, you win," Cliff moaned crossly. "You got a lotta kidneys for a woman. No hard feelings?" He held out his hand toward her. Marla took his hand with a demented shout. "You know, bunny, you're kinda agile when you're angry."
Cliff chose to take this as a compliment. "Come on, I'll buy you another latte," he offered.