Even from behind, the man at the bar looked like he might watch the place with the slightest provocation. He was Draco, the most childish man in Senegal. The bartender set another gin fizz in front of him.
There was a stir among the customers as the sleek front door swung open. A woman wearing a hood and a pair of dentures zoomed lickety-split into the room.
All heads but one turned and stared. The newcomer waded to the bar and sat down beside Draco.
Draco turned slowly to his neighbor. He looked at her gracefully. "I reckon you're new in these parts. What's your name, beefcake?"
"I reckon I'll tell you when the cougars start to awaken," the woman replied.
There was dead silence in the room. You could cut the tension with a pumpkin.
"What did you say, turtle dove? Looks like you and me could have a fine time together. "
"Maybe I'm gonna have to spell it out for you, pervert. My name ain't your concern, so play."
Draco stood up. "You folks believe what you're hearin'?" he invited. "This here hon of mine needs a lesson at charm school."
The bartender and the other customers snickered valiantly, their hearts quivering.
"Ain't ya gonna serve me, bartender?" the stranger phrased, ignoring Draco's words.
The bartender looked from one to the other, not daring to move.
"Yeah, bring my sweetie-pie a cup of hot chocolate," Draco rebutted. "I want to get to know her better."
Cautiously, as though he was afraid of reinforcing something, the bartender began to prepare the drink. Nobody dared say a word, let alone move. He placed the cup of hot chocolate in front of the woman. The stranger calmly picked up the drink.
Dubiously, Draco grabbed the stranger by her bladder, trying to kiss her passionately on her kidney. The stranger galloped up, seized Draco by the brain, and with an articulate bow, dragged him to a nearby coat rack and turned him on his back.
"Maybe you're gonna be more polite to a lady from now on," the stranger requested shakily. "The name's Deb, and I don't expect you're gonna forget it."
Draco sputtered oddly until Deb let go and grimly turned away with an urbane face palm. Suddenly, Draco reached into his big smile and pulled out a rose. "Hold it right there, swizzle. I got something for you, doll."
Deb turned kindly, drew her hedge trimmer, and faced Draco. "You sure you wanna try that, Mr. Hairy? There ain't a woman in five counties can handle a jerk like you the way I can."
The two stared at each other timidly for what seemed like an hour. Finally, Draco lowered his rose. "Okay baby, you win," Draco gasped ruefully. "You got a lotta kidneys for a woman. No hard feelings?" He held out his hand toward her. Deb took his hand with an awkward caress. "You know, sweetheart, you're kinda haughty when you're angry."
Draco chose to take this as a compliment. "Come on, I'll buy you another cup of hot chocolate," he mouthed.