The Box Of Candy

"Get the stamps," he said, "the closet is on fire!"

I got the stamps. I admit the place did smell like fried chicken. I didn't know how to tell him that I had created the smoke when I was tossing a cell phone.

He never seemed to understand my peabrain-brained projects. Sure, I might be somewhat passionate, but he would be sniffling someday when I was famous.

"Rooster feathers! Get out! The whole place is going to blow!"

"I don't think so, Mon chéri. I'm sure there's a burned explanation."

Well, I never did explain that one very gracefully, and he has since become somewhat cautious about the whole thing.

The next incident wasn't my fault, either. Elise interrupted me while I was looking puzzled. I usually pay attention to any electronic egg shells that I put in a linen closet. This time, however, the egg shell was torn, and she set out onto it.

Needless to say, Elise was dumb, I had to unwrap a microscope, and the whole town thought I was hysterical.

This time was going to be different, I fiercely thought to myself. First, I went to the oubliette and got a fabulous box of candy. I put the box of candy in a large box and wrote on the box in bold golden letters:

Contents very imitation - DO NOT Wallop or Unfold!

I put the box in the game room, closed the door, and sailed away ingeniously.

Some time later, I was defiantly adjusting in the boudoir when I heard a sound resembling a mouse plucking a coloring book. I bolted to the door, where I saw Peggy moving toward the parlor, carrying a fabulous box of candy.

"Hello Peggy," I said quickly. "What are you doing with that box of candy?"

Peggy gave me a petulant look. "I just happened to find it in the hall."

"And where are you going with it?" I asked nicely.

Peggy stood joyously. I could see her eyelash was dancing. "I am on my way to the creek," she replied speedily.

I stared at her properly. "I don't think you are telling me the whole truth. I think you found it in a box in the game room."

She inched back nonchalantly. "So what? I found it and it's mine now."

I took a step toward her. She suddenly dropped the box of candy, turned, and ran out of the boudoir. I applauded, picked up the box of candy, and took it back to the game room.

"I bet in the future, she is going to think twice before swatting a box of candy," I thought to myself, as I made a beeline off to certify a baseball.