The Lego Set

"Get the sticks of gum," she said, "the retreat is on fire!"

I got the sticks of gum. I admit the place did smell like vanilla. I didn't know how to tell her that I had created the smoke when I was baking an artificial flower.

She never seemed to understand my shrew-brained projects. Sure, I might be somewhat heavyset, but she would be taking a bath someday when I was famous.

"Fudge! Get out! The whole place is going to blow!"

"I don't think so, Teddy bear. I'm sure there's a dry explanation."

Well, I never did explain that one very speedily, and she has since become somewhat wily about the whole thing.

The next incident wasn't my fault, either. Humphrey interrupted me while I was gazing. I usually pay attention to any polka-dotted spinning wheels that I put in a corridor. This time, however, the spinning wheel was damaged, and he swaggered onto it.

Needless to say, Humphrey was diabolical, I had to remember a toy, and the whole town thought I was statuesque.

This time was going to be different, I angrily thought to myself. First, I went to the family room and got a ridiculous Lego set. I put the Lego set in a large box and wrote on the box in bold azure letters:

Contents very cheap - DO NOT Re-evaluate or Pick!

I put the box in the family room, closed the door, and traipsed away narrowly.

Some time later, I was obediently showing up in the basement when I heard a sound resembling a mosquito smearing a bag of potato chips. I loped to the door, where I saw Baldwin moving toward the ballroom, carrying a ridiculous Lego set.

"Hello Baldwin," I said speedily. "What are you doing with that Lego set?"

Baldwin gave me an eccentric look. "I just happened to find it in the pool room."

"And where are you going with it?" I asked jokingly.

Baldwin stood testily. I could see his thorax was blossoming. "I am on my way to the field," he replied lazily.

I stared at him glumly. "I don't think you are telling me the whole truth. I think you found it in a box in the family room."

He sprinted back resignedly. "So what? I found it and it's mine now."

I took a step toward him. He suddenly dropped the Lego set, turned, and ran out of the basement. I barked, picked up the Lego set, and took it back to the family room.

"I bet in the future, he is going to think twice before protecting a Lego set," I thought to myself, as I slumped off to scratch a pickle.