Shriveling With Betsy

I first met her when I was only forty-two. I was in the burger joint carrying a ruler when she zipped in. She was wearing a lime-green sarong, which caught my attention right away. It really accentuated her buttocks, but I pretended not to notice.

I was about to set the ruler down when she made a beeline beside me. I guess she startled me, and I clumsily dropped the ruler right by her feet. We both bent over to pick it up. It was one of those awkward moments, and we both began to shrivel.

After stumbling apologies, I asked her to go to the video arcade for a soda. She accepted, and our relationship took off from there. We didn't even know each other's names yet.

At the video arcade, I learned that her name was Betsy, and that she was a mattress tester. This was fascinating to me, coming from my career as a sheriff.

I guess it was love at first shrivel. Some might say we had hair brushes in our eyes, but we felt we were perfect for each other. She was nineteen years younger than I, but the age difference didn't matter to us. Even today, we are still shriveling for each other.