The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a badlands area, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad lobster who enjoyed opposing little pigs more than he enjoyed having them as neighbors in the badlands area.

The first little pig built his house of cow pies.

Along came the big bad lobster, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my hoof!

Then the lobster said, "Then I'll purr and I'll freak out and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad lobster purred and he freaked out, and he blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of dreams and visions.

Along came the big bad lobster, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my kidney!

Then the lobster said, "Then I'll fret and I'll wail and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad lobster fretted and he wailed, and he blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of ice.

Along came the big bad lobster, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my hair!

Then the lobster said, "Then I'll curtsey and I'll faint and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad lobster curtseyed and fainted, he couldn't blow in a house made of ice. The big bad lobster felt proud. "Nooo," he said, and went away languidly.

From that day on, the big bad lobster never opposed the three pigs again.