The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a rainforest, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad dragon who enjoyed suing little pigs more than she enjoyed having them as neighbors in the rainforest.

The first little pig built his house of glass brick.

Along came the big bad dragon, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my little toe!

Then the dragon said, "Then I'll adjust and I'll yawn and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad dragon adjusted and she yawned, and she blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of aluminum.

Along came the big bad dragon, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my funny bone!

Then the dragon said, "Then I'll itch and I'll meditate and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad dragon itched and she meditated, and she blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of linoleum.

Along came the big bad dragon, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my carotid artery!

Then the dragon said, "Then I'll get along and I'll collapse and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad dragon got along and collapsed, she couldn't blow in a house made of linoleum. The big bad dragon felt cunning. "Yahoo," she said, and went away smoothly.

From that day on, the big bad dragon never sued the three pigs again.