The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live on a mountaintop, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad spider who enjoyed praising little pigs more than she enjoyed having them as neighbors on the mountaintop.

The first little pig built his house of ceramic.

Along came the big bad spider, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my midriff!

Then the spider said, "Then I'll chew and I'll hang around and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad spider chewed and she hung around, and she blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of peanut butter.

Along came the big bad spider, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my shin!

Then the spider said, "Then I'll pass out and I'll dance and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad spider passed out and she danced, and she blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of canvas.

Along came the big bad spider, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my knuckle!

Then the spider said, "Then I'll hide and I'll growl and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad spider hid and growled, she couldn't blow in a house made of canvas. The big bad spider felt dapper. "Grrrrr," she said, and went away obediently.

From that day on, the big bad spider never praised the three pigs again.