The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a hayfield, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad pony who enjoyed recoiling from little pigs more than he enjoyed having them as neighbors in the hayfield.

The first little pig built his house of matchsticks.

Along came the big bad pony, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my gut!

Then the pony said, "Then I'll mumble and I'll grin and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad pony mumbled and he grinned, and he blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of peanut shells.

Along came the big bad pony, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my scalp!

Then the pony said, "Then I'll belch and I'll swear and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad pony belched and he swore, and he blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of concrete.

Along came the big bad pony, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my ankle!

Then the pony said, "Then I'll play solitaire and I'll gaze and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad pony played solitaire and gazed, he couldn't blow in a house made of concrete. The big bad pony felt ignoble. "Son of a gun," he said, and went away clumsily.

From that day on, the big bad pony never recoiled from the three pigs again.