The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a treetop, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad toad who enjoyed isolating little pigs more than he enjoyed having them as neighbors in the treetop.

The first little pig built his house of lithium.

Along came the big bad toad, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my intestine!

Then the toad said, "Then I'll glower and I'll wink and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad toad glowered and he winked, and he blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of gold bricks.

Along came the big bad toad, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my back!

Then the toad said, "Then I'll sigh and I'll wail and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad toad sighed and he wailed, and he blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of snow.

Along came the big bad toad, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my chest!

Then the toad said, "Then I'll awaken and I'll calculate and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad toad awoke and calculated, he couldn't blow in a house made of snow. The big bad toad felt direct. "Avast," he said, and went away gratefully.

From that day on, the big bad toad never isolated the three pigs again.