The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live on a mountaintop, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad polar bear who enjoyed eating little pigs more than he enjoyed having them as neighbors on the mountaintop.

The first little pig built his house of wax.

Along came the big bad polar bear, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my pinky!

Then the polar bear said, "Then I'll faint and I'll chatter and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad polar bear fainted and he chattered, and he blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of garbage.

Along came the big bad polar bear, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my jaw!

Then the polar bear said, "Then I'll vomit and I'll get along and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad polar bear vomited and he got along, and he blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of old bones.

Along came the big bad polar bear, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my tummy!

Then the polar bear said, "Then I'll wail and I'll jiggle and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad polar bear wailed and jiggled, he couldn't blow in a house made of old bones. The big bad polar bear felt dismal. "Mommy," he said, and went away quietly.

From that day on, the angry pigs never saw the big bad polar bear again.