The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live on a mountain, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad cocker spaniel who enjoyed biting little pigs more than he enjoyed having them as neighbors on the mountain.

The first little pig built his house of cardboard.

Along came the big bad cocker spaniel, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my earlobe!

Then the cocker spaniel said, "Then I'll breathe and I'll swoon and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad cocker spaniel breathed and he swooned, and he blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of flax.

Along came the big bad cocker spaniel, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my chest!

Then the cocker spaniel said, "Then I'll yell and I'll shake and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad cocker spaniel yelled and he shook, and he blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of seaweed.

Along came the big bad cocker spaniel, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my front tooth!

Then the cocker spaniel said, "Then I'll mutter and I'll do nothing and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad cocker spaniel muttered and did nothing, he couldn't blow in a house made of seaweed. The big bad cocker spaniel felt coy. "Shucks," he said, and went away demurely.

From that day on, the big bad cocker spaniel never bit the three pigs again.