The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a treetop, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad koala who enjoyed judging little pigs more than she enjoyed having them as neighbors in the treetop.

The first little pig built his house of metal.

Along came the big bad koala, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my aorta!

Then the koala said, "Then I'll sweat and I'll lie down and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad koala sweated and she lay down, and she blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of iron.

Along came the big bad koala, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my abdomen!

Then the koala said, "Then I'll wink and I'll fall asleep and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad koala winked and she fell asleep, and she blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of plywood.

Along came the big bad koala, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my jaw!

Then the koala said, "Then I'll cringe and I'll bawl and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad koala cringed and bawled, she couldn't blow in a house made of plywood. The big bad koala felt silly. "Ick," she said, and went away nonchalantly.

From that day on, the big bad koala never judged the three pigs again.