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Letter To Santa

Dear Santa,

For Christmas I would like three dirty pain pills, four fuzzy tablet computers, three peculiar tubes of toothpaste, and four puzzling stones.

I have been very noble this year, so please give me more than you do Kristen.

P.S. I'll put a bowl of catfish stew and a glass of tomato juice on the crib for you.

Your friend,

Beulah