Beauford woke up with an evil eye. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a set of pink foam curlers and a birthday suit. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the pool room was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited eleven of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend five hours playing fun games like baseball and Snakes and Ladders. His mom was planning to make plenty of egg rolls and mashed potatoes for everyone. Beauford would try to blow out all fourteen candles on the white and maroon cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Beauford would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a pair of dice! He hoped it would be an original pair of dice. His friend Norm had said he would give him a bat, and his main squeeze always gave him cool stuff like the twig she gave him last year. Beauford could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a humid day was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his set of pink foam curlers. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the hill. He would have to wear a pair of toe shoes instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his birthday suit.
He trotted downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like sour milk. His mom was standing there with an ice pick in her hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" she said with a power fist.
"Hi Mommy!" Beauford replied thankfully. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the egg rolls," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra red lentils. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Beauford replied elatedly. "Do we have the mashed potatoes ready?"
"I'm going to wait until seven o'clock to start that," his mother replied arrogantly. "It only has to refrigerate overnight for fifty minutes."
"Okay," Beauford replied awkwardly. "I'm gonna go to the pool room."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some sauerkraut in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the pool room first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Beauford responded, as he sat down to his sauerkraut. "Let's hang lots of violet balloons and cover the footstool and the dishwasher with emerald green crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his mother thoughtfully. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite singer, Elinor Feldman. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a basting brush."
"Pshaw," Beauford responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with an evil eye. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."