Connie woke up with a cringe. Today was her birthday! She was going to have a lot of fun today. First, she would dress up in a gunny sack and an armband. Then, she would run downstairs to see if the outhouse was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited three of her closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend four hours playing fun games like rummy and Russian roulette. Her dad was planning to make plenty of potatoes and gravy and catfish stew for everyone. Connie would try to blow out all two candles on the forest green and burgundy cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Connie would be opening her gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a paper clip! She hoped it would be an expensive paper clip. Her friend Debbie had said she would give her a flower, and her grandfather always gave her cool stuff like the bell she gave her last year. Connie could hardly wait!
She glanced out the window and was surprised to see that an ice storm was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. She looked in her closet for her gunny sack. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from her day at the swamp. She would have to wear a coonskin hat instead. She didn't really care, as long as she could still wear her armband.
She galumphed downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like aftershave lotion. Her dad was standing there with a meat thermometer in his hand. "Happy Birthday Honey!" he said with a roar.
"Hi Daddy!" Connie replied greedily. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the potatoes and gravy," he replied. "I decided to make it with extra bamboo shoots. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Connie replied ruefully. "Do we have the catfish stew ready?"
"I'm going to wait until four o'clock to start that," her father replied numbly. "It only has to poach lightly for eighty-nine minutes."
"Okay," Connie replied dreamily. "I'm gonna go to the outhouse."
"First, young lady, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some pancakes in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the outhouse first?" she begged.
"It looks just like it always does," her father replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Connie responded, as she sat down to her pancakes. "Let's hang lots of metallic red balloons and cover the catbird seat and the washing machine with striped crepe paper."
"That's fine," said her father lickety-split. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite Tv star, Olivia Lawrence. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a cheesecloth."
"Very well done," Connie responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Father with a gasp. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."