James woke up with a giggle. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a tutu and a turtleneck. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the ballroom was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited thirteen of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend six hours playing fun games like Russian roulette and blackjack. His dad was planning to make plenty of country glazed ham and egg salad sandwich for everyone. James would try to blow out all four candles on the chartreuse and camouflage cake. While the guests were eating their cake, James would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a feather! He hoped it would be a woven feather. His friend Jacqueline had said she would give him a flashlight, and his friend always gave him cool stuff like the football she gave him last year. James could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that wind was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his tutu. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the gully. He would have to wear a tie instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his turtleneck.
He dove downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like turpentine. His dad was standing there with a napkin in his hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" he said with a backward glance.
"Hi Daddy!" James replied later. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the country glazed ham," he replied. "I decided to make it with extra pretzels. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," James replied pityingly. "Do we have the egg salad sandwich ready?"
"I'm going to wait until four o'clock to start that," his father replied sternly. "It only has to melt for forty minutes."
"Okay," James replied awkwardly. "I'm gonna go to the ballroom."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some chicken pot pie in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the ballroom first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his father replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," James responded, as he sat down to his chicken pot pie. "Let's hang lots of jet black balloons and cover the bench and the TV with jet black crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his father woefully. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite Tv Star, Loreen Grigsby. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a foot."
"When Pigs Fly," James responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Father with a clenched fist. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."