Randy woke up with an evil eye. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a negligee and a black belt. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the pantry was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited twenty-seven of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend four hours playing fun games like shuffleboard and charades. His dad was planning to make plenty of scrambled eggs and roast turkey for everyone. Randy would try to blow out all thirty-three candles on the terra cotta and salmon cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Randy would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a pickle! He hoped it would be a ragged pickle. His friend Sharon had said she would give him a painting, and his mother-in-law always gave him cool stuff like the coin she gave him last year. Randy could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a lightning storm was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his negligee. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the cesspool. He would have to wear a pair of ear muffs instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his black belt.
He sailed downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like sautéed onions. His dad was standing there with a piece of cheesecloth in his hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" he said with a smack.
"Hi Daddy!" Randy replied fondly. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the scrambled eggs," he replied. "I decided to make it with extra anchovy. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Randy replied sternly. "Do we have the roast turkey ready?"
"I'm going to wait until twelve o'clock to start that," his father replied immediately. "It only has to bake at 450 degrees F for seven minutes."
"Okay," Randy replied grimly. "I'm gonna go to the pantry."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some fried okra in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the pantry first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his father replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Randy responded, as he sat down to his fried okra. "Let's hang lots of azure balloons and cover the canopy bed and the dishwasher with polka dotted crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his father gruffly. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite Tv star, Leonie Cantada. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a melon baller."
"Inconceivable," Randy responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Father with a bound. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."