Oliver woke up with a sniffle. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a body shirt and a midi skirt. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the front porch was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited four of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend five hours playing fun games like Mother May I and Mother May I. His mom was planning to make plenty of applesauce and smoked salmon for everyone. Oliver would try to blow out all nine candles on the red and terra cotta cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Oliver would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain an ashtray! He hoped it would be a miniature ashtray. His friend Gerald had said he would give him a beach ball, and his cousin always gave him cool stuff like the diamond she gave him last year. Oliver could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a typhoon was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his body shirt. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the arroyo. He would have to wear a pair of panties instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his midi skirt.
He sallied forth downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like cigars. His mom was standing there with a knife in her hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" she said with a backward glance.
"Hi Mommy!" Oliver replied smoothly. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the applesauce," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra sugar. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Oliver replied calmly. "Do we have the smoked salmon ready?"
"I'm going to wait until eight o'clock to start that," his mother replied wryly. "It only has to mix unabashedly for seventy-five minutes."
"Okay," Oliver replied curiously. "I'm gonna go to the front porch."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some hot dogs in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the front porch first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Oliver responded, as he sat down to his hot dogs. "Let's hang lots of camouflage balloons and cover the dining table and the mattress with terra cotta crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his mother sarcastically. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite singer, Charlene Chang. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has an electric paint mixer."
"My land," Oliver responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a sneer. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."