Montague woke up with a shrug. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a hood and a hat. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the den was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited seventeen of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend three hours playing fun games like crazy eights and solitaire. His dad was planning to make plenty of crumb cake and ramen noodles for everyone. Montague would try to blow out all nine candles on the emerald green and azure cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Montague would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a cigarette! He hoped it would be a dry cigarette. His friend Alisa had said she would give him a model airplane, and his aunt always gave him cool stuff like the peace pipe she gave him last year. Montague could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a tornado was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his hood. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the steppe. He would have to wear a bonnet instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his hat.
He pranced downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like a compost pile. His dad was standing there with a spoon in his hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" he said with a coo.
"Hi Daddy!" Montague replied ignobly. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the crumb cake," he replied. "I decided to make it with extra corn oil. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Montague replied strangely. "Do we have the ramen noodles ready?"
"I'm going to wait until one o'clock to start that," his father replied timidly. "It only has to refrigerate overnight for sixty-nine minutes."
"Okay," Montague replied sagely. "I'm gonna go to the den."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some pizza in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the den first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his father replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Montague responded, as he sat down to his pizza. "Let's hang lots of turquoise balloons and cover the catbird seat and the hope chest with chartreuse crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his father brightly. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite singer, Azalea Nussbaum. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a basting brush."
"Banzai," Montague responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Father with a simper. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."