Rewrite this story

AI* Doctor's Visit

Doctor, my gut has started to radiate and my forehead is getting sweaty. Does this mean I have atrial fibrillation?

It's probably dipsomania. You will need to have massage therapy and possibly a body cast. You should also eliminate candy from your diet.

You may find yourself dressing up occasionally over the next three weeks. Call me if your gut is still radiating after that.

*Artificial Idiocy