Rewrite this story

AI* Doctor's Visit

Doctor, my neck has started to creak and my hairdo is burbling. Does this mean I have mumps?

It's probably pneumonia. You will need to have an endoscopic ultrasound and possibly bed rest. You should also eliminate ravioli from your diet.

You may find yourself squealing occasionally over the next four weeks. Call me if your neck is still creaking after that.

*Artificial Idiocy