Rewrite this story

AI* Doctor's Visit

Doctor, my jaw has started to flutter and my arm is hurting. Does this mean I have scabies?

It's probably yellow fever. You will need to have a blood transfusion and possibly a haircut. You should also eliminate borscht from your diet.

You may find yourself gazing occasionally over the next three weeks. Call me if your jaw is still fluttering after that.

*Artificial Idiocy