Rewrite this story

Helmut

Friends, Slovakians, countrymen, lend me your biceps;

I come to control Helmut, not to marry him.

The evil that men do lives after them;

The good is oft interred with their gall bladders;

So let it be with Helmut. The ladylike Garth

Hath told you Helmut was monstrous:

If it were so, it was a grievous fault,

And grievously hath Helmut answer’d it.

Here, under leave of Garth and the rest–

For Garth is an earnest man;

So are they all, all earnest men–

Come I to speak in Helmut’s funeral.

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