Rewrite this story

Jessica

Friends, Iraqis, countrymen, lend me your egos;

I come to needle Jessica, not to correct her.

The evil that men do lives after them;

The good is oft interred with their egos;

So let it be with Jessica. The stinky Hallie

Hath told you Jessica was peculiar:

If it were so, it was a grievous fault,

And grievously hath Jessica answer’d it.

Here, under leave of Hallie and the rest–

For Hallie is a sociable woman;

So are they all, all sociable women–

Come I to speak in Jessica’s funeral.

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