Jackie

Friends, Kiwis, countrymen, lend me your thyroid glands;

I come to tickle Jackie, not to bore her.

The evil that men do lives after them;

The good is oft interred with their funny bones;

So let it be with Jackie. The princely Jenny

Hath told you Jackie was obese:

If it were so, it was a grievous fault,

And grievously hath Jackie answer’d it.

Here, under leave of Jenny and the rest–

For Jenny is a brilliant woman;

So are they all, all brilliant women–

Come I to speak in Jackie’s funeral.

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