Rewrite this story

Hendrick

Friends, Mozambiquans, countrymen, lend me your esophaguses;

I come to leave Hendrick, not to reeducate him.

The evil that men do lives after them;

The good is oft interred with their nostrils;

So let it be with Hendrick. The athletic Arnie

Hath told you Hendrick was bilious:

If it were so, it was a grievous fault,

And grievously hath Hendrick answer’d it.

Here, under leave of Arnie and the rest–

For Arnie is a melancholic man;

So are they all, all melancholic men–

Come I to speak in Hendrick’s funeral.

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