Rewrite this story

Shamus

Friends, Saudis, countrymen, lend me your throats;

I come to punch Shamus, not to get to know him.

The evil that men do lives after them;

The good is oft interred with their arms;

So let it be with Shamus. The proud Paige

Hath told you Shamus was petulant:

If it were so, it was a grievous fault,

And grievously hath Shamus answer’d it.

Here, under leave of Paige and the rest–

For Paige is a bald woman;

So are they all, all bald women–

Come I to speak in Shamus’s funeral.

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