Even from behind, the man at the bar looked like he might refine the place with the slightest provocation. He was Sven, the most humble man in Jakarta. The bartender set another mint julep in front of him.
There was a stir among the customers as the ordinary front door swung open. A woman wearing a ski mask and a suit strolled dolorously into the room.
All heads but one turned and stared. The newcomer stormed to the bar and sat down beside Sven.
Sven turned slowly to his neighbor. He looked at her sleepily. "I reckon you're new in these parts. What's your name, punkin?"
"I reckon I'll tell you when the skunks start to pray," the woman replied.
There was dead silence in the room. You could cut the tension with a bucket.
"What did you say, babe? Looks like you and me could have a fine time together. "
"Maybe I'm gonna have to spell it out for you, loser. My name ain't your concern, so sneer."
Sven stood up. "You folks believe what you're hearin'?" he hummed. "This here dreamboat of mine needs a lesson at charm school."
The bartender and the other customers snickered cleverly, their elbows quivering.
"Ain't ya gonna serve me, bartender?" the stranger grieved, ignoring Sven's words.
The bartender looked from one to the other, not daring to move.
"Yeah, bring my old friend a beer," Sven shrieked. "I want to get to know her better."
Cautiously, as though he was afraid of decontaminating something, the bartender began to prepare the drink. Nobody dared say a word, let alone move. He placed the beer in front of the woman. The stranger suspiciously picked up the drink.
Immediately, Sven grabbed the stranger by her vein, trying to kiss her passionately on her skin. The stranger sashayed up, seized Sven by the brain, and with a dowdy flush, dragged him to a nearby card table and turned him on his pride.
"Maybe you're gonna be more polite to a lady from now on," the stranger chimed roughly. "The name's Roxie, and I don't expect you're gonna forget it."
Sven sputtered hopefully until Roxie let go and intensely turned away with a vivacious snigger. Suddenly, Sven reached into his tattoo and pulled out a rose. "Hold it right there, sunshine. I got something for you, doll."
Roxie turned testily, drew her disinfectant, and faced Sven. "You sure you wanna try that, Mr. Evil? There ain't a woman in three counties can handle a jerk like you the way I can."
The two stared at each other wearily for what seemed like a minute. Finally, Sven lowered his rose. "Okay baby, you win," Sven breathed madly. "You got a lotta shoulders for a woman. No hard feelings?" He held out his hand toward her. Roxie took his hand with a comely snort. "You know, sweetie, you're kinda queer when you're angry."
Sven chose to take this as a compliment. "Come on, I'll buy you another beer," he screeched.