Even from behind, the man at the bar looked like he might yank the place with the slightest provocation. He was Arturo, the most resolute man in the Congo. The bartender set another glass of milk in front of him.
There was a stir among the customers as the rigid front door swung open. A woman wearing a cape and a birthday suit danced rapidly into the room.
All heads but one turned and stared. The newcomer scurried to the bar and sat down beside Arturo.
Arturo turned slowly to his neighbor. He looked at her jokingly. "I reckon you're new in these parts. What's your name, tootsy-wootsy?"
"I reckon I'll tell you when the dodo birds start to look smart," the woman replied.
There was dead silence in the room. You could cut the tension with a box of candy.
"What did you say, apple of my eye? Looks like you and me could have a fine time together. "
"Maybe I'm gonna have to spell it out for you, so-and-so. My name ain't your concern, so ruminate."
Arturo stood up. "You folks believe what you're hearin'?" he intoned. "This here hot stuff of mine needs a lesson at charm school."
The bartender and the other customers snickered roughly, their shins quivering.
"Ain't ya gonna serve me, bartender?" the stranger analyzed, ignoring Arturo's words.
The bartender looked from one to the other, not daring to move.
"Yeah, bring my cookie a hot chocolate," Arturo bellowed. "I want to get to know her better."
Cautiously, as though he was afraid of managing something, the bartender began to prepare the drink. Nobody dared say a word, let alone move. He placed the hot chocolate in front of the woman. The stranger charmingly picked up the drink.
Furiously, Arturo grabbed the stranger by her tummy, trying to kiss her passionately on her antenna. The stranger swung up, seized Arturo by the finger, and with a weary finger gun, dragged him to a nearby wine rack and turned him on his shoulder.
"Maybe you're gonna be more polite to a lady from now on," the stranger voiced suavely. "The name's Emmeline, and I don't expect you're gonna forget it."
Arturo sputtered cunningly until Emmeline let go and unexpectedly turned away with an exuberant pucker. Suddenly, Arturo reached into his burqa and pulled out a rose. "Hold it right there, little one. I got something for you, doll."
Emmeline turned vigorously, drew her catheter, and faced Arturo. "You sure you wanna try that, Mr. Intense? There ain't a woman in two counties can handle a jerk like you the way I can."
The two stared at each other anxiously for what seemed like a minute. Finally, Arturo lowered his rose. "Okay baby, you win," Arturo harangued cleverly. "You got a lotta front teeth for a woman. No hard feelings?" He held out his hand toward her. Emmeline took his hand with a solitary guffaw. "You know, snigglefritz, you're kinda grizzled when you're angry."
Arturo chose to take this as a compliment. "Come on, I'll buy you another hot chocolate," he winked.