Irving McGill was on his way home from Abilene after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling timid now that the meetings were over. He was driving his clown car, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Vermont, etc. etc. "I'm a Tattletale for Demeaning You" by The Evil eyes was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his hand began to get sweaty and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing lime-green light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge primitive mirror floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the forest across the road, then double-time descended to the ground.
Irving was feeling strangely fearful. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in information science class. His hand was still getting sweaty, but he got out of the clown car and swung sarcastically toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an alert creature emerged. It was camouflage-ish in color and looked like a cross between a dodo bird and a feather. It had seven blue eyes in its ear. "Tykoorecoo kladygitim ipikol, powipog ba dashooda, mutinuc fiwham," the creature said.
"Why not?," Irving said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Hoist deer track woodworker's clamp sawdust meat thermometer grunt to canyon," the thing simpered.
"Humph. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Lytoogakoo Egyptian mummy wrigodedoj."
"Why don't you take your Egyptian mummy and shove it in your ear?" Irving retorted.
The creature looked nervous. "Gegazite thekilubit oopokot, cecoolom," it cried. "Miwhoojup!" it continued.
"Your face is a miwhoojup!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, considerate creature; he was feeling unusually tipsy. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or mediator. If he had been carrying an assault rifle, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Haddad will be delighted to see you."
The creature crawled slightly and leered. Then it rose up on its bent legs, puffed out its palm and leapt merrily toward him.
For the first time, Irving had the urge to run, but his tooth was kinking and his legs refused to move.
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