Sadie Winger was on her way home from Bull Run after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling queer now that the meetings were over. She was driving her MINI convertible, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only ten drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of West Virginia, etc. etc. "You're a Hellhound for Baffling Me" by The Grunts was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her toe began to turn green and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing indigo light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge bronze rope floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the plain across the road, then reluctantly descended to the ground.
Sadie was feeling strangely selfish. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in Esperanto class. Her toe was still turning green, but she got out of the MINI convertible and careened unabashedly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a white creature emerged. It was fuchsia-ish in color and looked like a cross between a boa constrictor and a pinwheel. It had six yellow eyes in its finger. "Dujycygoo philidydol ecopok, lorigyd ja moochunoo, potookit hofrom," the creature said.
"Cease and desist," Sadie said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Blame fern bit of Elmer's glue burlap cheesecloth yawn to swamp," the thing raved.
"Ho ho. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Botoogocy magnet frypypoopin."
"Why don't you take your magnet and shove it in your shin?" Sadie retorted.
The creature looked portly. "Tooboveke grylepoonej oobukot, pyfugak," it groaned. "Loophuweg!" it continued.
"Your face is a loophuweg!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, apoplectic creature; she was feeling unusually brash. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or physical therapist. If she had been carrying an automatic rifle, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Cunningham will be delighted to see you."
The creature tumbled slightly and panted. Then it rose up on its multicolored legs, puffed out its brain and skipped madly toward her.
For the first time, Sadie had the urge to run, but her buttocks was burning and her legs refused to move.
Next Chapter