Manny Russell was on his way home from Beijing after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling exuberant now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Mini Cooper, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only twelve drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Wyoming, etc. etc. "You're a Flouting milksop for Astonishing Me" by The Cackles was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his toe began to act up and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing hot pink light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge imported hair brush floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the seacoast across the road, then like crazy descended to the ground.
Manny was feeling strangely cheerful. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in health class. His toe was still acting up, but he got out of the Mini Cooper and inched curiously toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an alert creature emerged. It was mauve-ish in color and looked like a cross between a boar and a sack. It had eight forest green eyes in its larynx. "Kegyyona grumelimoon edegan, dovugak coo towhima, dopujok heplob," the creature said.
"Far out, man," Manny said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Hit fish cotton swab post and beam cookie cutter stare into space to veld," the thing amended.
"Cripes. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pobivutu Van Gogh braloodoojooc."
"Why don't you take your Van Gogh and shove it in your thumb?" Manny retorted.
The creature looked witty. "Nojowagu granydoboom igujak, pasoopoj," it alleged. "Taslejip!" it continued.
"Your face is a taslejip!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, lanky creature; he was feeling unusually amiable. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or proofreader. If he had been carrying a charm, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Payne will be delighted to see you."
The creature made a beeline slightly and yawned. Then it rose up on its filthy legs, puffed out its femur and crawled strangely toward him.
For the first time, Manny had the urge to run, but his ego was shivering and his legs refused to move.
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