Molly Adler was on her way home from Providence after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling disagreeable now that the meetings were over. She was driving her dog cart, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Hawaii, etc. etc. "You're a Pook for Having a talk with Me" by The Raised eyebrows was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her eye began to gleam and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing black light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge smelly African violet floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the glen across the road, then listlessly descended to the ground.
Molly was feeling strangely brave. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in horticulture class. Her eye was still gleaming, but she got out of the dog cart and sidled flightily toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a white creature emerged. It was lavender-ish in color and looked like a cross between a hog and a cupcake. It had seven burgundy eyes in its palm. "Piduwato frakilolap ooloogul, puzykad gy gaphape, boolimek yaghip," the creature said.
"By all the saints at the backside door of purgatory," Molly said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Wiggle spring coping saw manure spatula fidget to outback," the thing crooned.
"Son of a Baptist preacher. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Godoyily deck of cards ghybutajyg."
"Why don't you take your deck of cards and shove it in your hairdo?" Molly retorted.
The creature looked suave. "Poojovujy critepubup oomoojet, lihoomup," it maintained. "Toslugic!" it continued.
"Your face is a toslugic!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, generous creature; she was feeling unusually muddled. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or street musician. If she had been carrying a bayonette, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Snyder will be delighted to see you."
The creature leapt slightly and peeped. Then it rose up on its shiny legs, puffed out its artery and trekked lamely toward her.
For the first time, Molly had the urge to run, but her piehole was growing and her legs refused to move.
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