Bridget Vernon was on her way home from Salem after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling generous now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Volvo, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only twelve drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Colorado, etc. etc. "You're a Bumpkin for Sneering at Me" by The Gurgles was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her skull began to rot and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing scarlet light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge greasy toy floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the cesspool across the road, then ponderously descended to the ground.
Bridget was feeling strangely puzzled. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in food science class. Her skull was still rotting, but she got out of the Volvo and tumbled softly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a nervous creature emerged. It was amber-ish in color and looked like a cross between a Chihuahua and a flash drive. It had seven teal eyes in its skull. "Dybooyija krigocunep oloolol, musulut no dophape, tymodoog gochop," the creature said.
"In your dreams," Bridget said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Dye spring corkscrew candy slotted spoon adjust the clock to peninsula," the thing rebutted.
"Oh please. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Jygywije radio cholokycug."
"Why don't you take your radio and shove it in your paw?" Bridget retorted.
The creature looked zany. "Lootiratu flejogepyp igodot, luzookut," it mouthed. "Lychucik!" it continued.
"Your face is a lychucik!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, fearless creature; she was feeling unusually suave. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or oboist. If she had been carrying a Taser, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Bernstein will be delighted to see you."
The creature careened slightly and crept. Then it rose up on its aromatic legs, puffed out its neck and inched sarcastically toward her.
For the first time, Bridget had the urge to run, but her abdomen was calcifying and her legs refused to move.
Next Chapter