Keiko Potatohead was on her way home from Kawasaki after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling cuddly now that the meetings were over. She was driving her police car, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only four drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Indiana, etc. etc. "You're a Weirdo for Laughing at Me" by The Cringes was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her rib began to shake and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing azure light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge ruined firecracker floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the cesspool across the road, then hurriedly descended to the ground.
Keiko was feeling strangely woozy. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in aeronautics class. Her rib was still shaking, but she got out of the police car and clambered carelessly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a smallish creature emerged. It was green-ish in color and looked like a cross between an ostrich and a fishing pole. It had seven hot pink eyes in its antenna. "Kupejota bralycutel epugel, paviduj ka pooslugi, pabokej vicloob," the creature said.
"Alley oop," Keiko said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Wiggle leaf eyelash curler glass ice pick chew to hillside," the thing vouched.
"Never. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Keguveda blank check brujumycep."
"Why don't you take your blank check and shove it in your larynx?" Keiko retorted.
The creature looked monstrous. "Gogevooki prucinybed opymec, mazimood," it agreed. "Tuwrigoot!" it continued.
"Your face is a tuwrigoot!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, cocky creature; she was feeling unusually ambitious. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or missionary. If she had been carrying a baseball bat, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Turner will be delighted to see you."
The creature dove slightly and slobbered. Then it rose up on its soft legs, puffed out its Achilles tendon and sped demurely toward her.
For the first time, Keiko had the urge to run, but her wrist was disintegrating and her legs refused to move.
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