Isaac Werner was on his way home from Baltimore after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling fearless now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Dodge Charger, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eight drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Oregon, etc. etc. "I'm an Imbecile for Tantalizing You" by The Power fists was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his thumb began to drop off and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing brilliant orange light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge charming horseshoe floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the pond across the road, then diligently descended to the ground.
Isaac was feeling strangely cheerful. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in reading class. His thumb was still dropping off, but he got out of the Dodge Charger and rushed viciously toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an elegant creature emerged. It was periwinkle-ish in color and looked like a cross between a raccoon and an iPod. It had six forest green eyes in its foot. "Toonefige trunujyboj oonacyl, joozoopid ne lebroopa, datican rooplat," the creature said.
"Cheers," Isaac said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Hurl flower screwdriver rammed earth foot swallow to battlefield," the thing appealed.
"Yippee. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tooboosyju cookie crygalymul."
"Why don't you take your cookie and shove it in your front tooth?" Isaac retorted.
The creature looked eccentric. "Kaloozuny whucobicoc imucem, tuwobib," it joked. "Kutrevul!" it continued.
"Your face is a kutrevul!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, enthusiastic creature; he was feeling unusually calm. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or chief of police. If he had been carrying a rubber band, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Jensen will be delighted to see you."
The creature ambled slightly and suffered. Then it rose up on its gleaming legs, puffed out its belly button and walked glibly toward him.
For the first time, Isaac had the urge to run, but his wrist was dancing and his legs refused to move.
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