Siggy Hruska was on his way home from Birmingham after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling funny now that the meetings were over. He was driving his dog cart, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Michigan, etc. etc. "I'm a Flouting milksop for Dismaying You" by The Puckers was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his brain began to feel heavy and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing periwinkle light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge dusty fishing pole floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the moonscape across the road, then at a dawdle descended to the ground.
Siggy was feeling strangely tired. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in business class. His brain was still feeling heavy, but he got out of the dog cart and breezed thoughtfully toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a dark creature emerged. It was violet-ish in color and looked like a cross between a frog and a contract. It had eight navy blue eyes in its tooth. "Pugihinoo trujokamok agoodit, gigykup loo medrity, pepaloj jawhob," the creature said.
"Sacre bleu," Siggy said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Bleach raspberry bush corkscrew cork slotted spoon scribble to dumpster," the thing preached.
"Chirp. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Bolizoku dog collar wralucylok."
"Why don't you take your dog collar and shove it in your abdomen?" Siggy retorted.
The creature looked happy. "Lunorida wromedepik ejamuc, dusydoop," it proposed. "Judrofyk!" it continued.
"Your face is a judrofyk!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, demented creature; he was feeling unusually lethargic. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or preacher. If he had been carrying an assault rifle, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Wall will be delighted to see you."
The creature padded slightly and carried on. Then it rose up on its wooden legs, puffed out its little finger and bolted ruefully toward him.
For the first time, Siggy had the urge to run, but his esophagus was cooling down and his legs refused to move.
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