Liling Greco was on her way home from Shanghai after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling calm now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Buick Le Sabre, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Louisiana, etc. etc. "I'm a Hooligan for Chatting with You" by The Honks was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her back began to sweat and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing aquamarine light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge primitive stick of gum floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the mountaintop across the road, then like crazy descended to the ground.
Liling was feeling strangely modest. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in astronomy class. Her back was still sweating, but she got out of the Buick Le Sabre and darted gleefully toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a heavyset creature emerged. It was white-ish in color and looked like a cross between a butterfly and a kite. It had six chocolate brown eyes in its bladder. "Cadahyco prymajacyp oopydij, kesoojeg bi maprepe, nicodyn joghyj," the creature said.
"I'm outta here," Liling said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Condemn mushroom broom sheet metal dull knife murmur to treetop," the thing demanded.
"Crackers. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Celagaly mushroom wrybucadoop."
"Why don't you take your mushroom and shove it in your knuckle?" Liling retorted.
The creature looked direct. "Nypagooga brydogodyt agatag, gooyydep," it instructed. "Kooquoosuc!" it continued.
"Your face is a kooquoosuc!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, calm creature; she was feeling unusually excitable. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or priest. If she had been carrying a can of pepper spray, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Everett will be delighted to see you."
The creature swung slightly and typed. Then it rose up on its dirty legs, puffed out its tummy and marched blankly toward her.
For the first time, Liling had the urge to run, but her hangnail was jamming up and her legs refused to move.
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