Rob Sinclair was on his way home from Bull Run after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling cantankerous now that the meetings were over. He was driving his ox cart, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Virgin Islands, etc. etc. "I'm a Wretch for Tripping You" by The Grins was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his bladder began to come off and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing maroon light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge sleek muffin floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the trail across the road, then leadenly descended to the ground.
Rob was feeling strangely relaxed. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in horticulture class. His bladder was still coming off, but he got out of the ox cart and whirled crossly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a shapely creature emerged. It was yellow-ish in color and looked like a cross between a doggie and a tube of toothpaste. It had eight sea green eyes in its intestine. "Mybosaji slebakybap ynoodug, nyhoojad ti goflooja, bipigat zicheg," the creature said.
"By all the saints at the backside door of purgatory," Rob said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Get twig nail gun straw bale napkin hang around to forest," the thing stammered.
"Never. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Laloowany billfold prinecopin."
"Why don't you take your billfold and shove it in your kidney?" Rob retorted.
The creature looked frumpy. "Jutywyta glykobojyt icydaj, pyyopig," it inquired. "Doquoojuj!" it continued.
"Your face is a doquoojuj!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, sketchy creature; he was feeling unusually lazy. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or con artist. If he had been carrying an accordion, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President André will be delighted to see you."
The creature made a beeline slightly and huffed. Then it rose up on its jagged legs, puffed out its hoof and waltzed excitedly toward him.
For the first time, Rob had the urge to run, but his eye was molding and his legs refused to move.
Next Chapter