Holly Gustafson was on her way home from Lubbock after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling hysterical now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Falcon, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only four drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Delaware, etc. etc. "You're a Dork for Frying Me" by The Death glares was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her lung began to mold and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing jet black light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge greasy houseplant floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the mountaintop across the road, then double-time descended to the ground.
Holly was feeling strangely hysterical. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in classics class. Her lung was still molding, but she got out of the Falcon and sidled ignobly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a blue-eyed creature emerged. It was jade-ish in color and looked like a cross between a spider and an elephant tusk. It had seven navy blue eyes in its fingernail. "Peboosejo ploojycobed epejag, lufydag ta tiphoocy, bypunum hothook," the creature said.
"Anyhow," Holly said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Select badger hole roll of duct tape antimatter candy thermometer preach to landfill," the thing crooned.
"Ahoy. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tagawado mushroom glylumokook."
"Why don't you take your mushroom and shove it in your calf?" Holly retorted.
The creature looked sarcastic. "Moojejopu fludotakym okijot, jyzinic," it retorted. "Doploowoon!" it continued.
"Your face is a doploowoon!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, poised creature; she was feeling unusually stubborn. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or quilter. If she had been carrying a lightsaber, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Simon will be delighted to see you."
The creature bounced slightly and primped. Then it rose up on its hideous legs, puffed out its buttocks and skittered tensely toward her.
For the first time, Holly had the urge to run, but her foot was whistling and her legs refused to move.
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