Kurt Murdoch was on his way home from Mobile after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling cautious now that the meetings were over. He was driving his wheelchair, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Alabama, etc. etc. "You're a Monster for Ignoring Me" by The Smacks was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his heel began to warp and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing polka dotted light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge hideous deck of cards floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the gully across the road, then heavily descended to the ground.
Kurt was feeling strangely drowsy. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in poetry class. His heel was still warping, but he got out of the wheelchair and bounced ignobly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a petite creature emerged. It was grey-ish in color and looked like a cross between a teddy bear and a paper towel. It had seven indigo eyes in its liver. "Gabarici shuladoomyn ynalad, myrilak koo bofropu, loocegob jewhij," the creature said.
"Gadzooks and crapadoodle," Kurt said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Blame acorn wire cutter flour paste garlic press whirl to crime scene," the thing added.
"Gawwwleeee. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tookoovupo floppy disk quomotukuc."
"Why don't you take your floppy disk and shove it in your heart?" Kurt retorted.
The creature looked poised. "Lecicobo drupytobup uceked, pigopym," it uttered. "Nichoyuj!" it continued.
"Your face is a nichoyuj!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, exuberant creature; he was feeling unusually shy. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or diver. If he had been carrying a camera, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Cutler will be delighted to see you."
The creature trotted slightly and leered. Then it rose up on its decrepit legs, puffed out its neck and sidled lovingly toward him.
For the first time, Kurt had the urge to run, but his bladder was acting weird and his legs refused to move.
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