Sig Murray was on his way home from Cleveland after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling confident now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Nissan Sentra, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Hawaii, etc. etc. "You're a Sneak for Surprising Me" by The Raised eyebrows was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his bicep began to gleam and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing aqua light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge hand-painted whistle floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the ridge across the road, then quickly descended to the ground.
Sig was feeling strangely lazy. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in classics class. His bicep was still gleaming, but he got out of the Nissan Sentra and skipped coldly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a small creature emerged. It was yellow-ish in color and looked like a cross between a reindeer and a teacup. It had two brilliant orange eyes in its bladder. "Gacegooja thoogypokat oocimul, nojoomen boo kychape, nodelup hyflop," the creature said.
"Neato," Sig said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Analyze tree roll of duct tape Elmer's glue whisk sweat to savanna," the thing snorted.
"Incredible. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Jimyyomu stick trukicedoop."
"Why don't you take your stick and shove it in your hoof?" Sig retorted.
The creature looked young. "Kakyhooka grymumelek unilej, tecujod," it groaned. "Tequizym!" it continued.
"Your face is a tequizym!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, portly creature; he was feeling unusually peckish. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or sheriff. If he had been carrying a bottle of Tabasco Sauce, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Moore will be delighted to see you."
The creature lumbered slightly and danced. Then it rose up on its magnificent legs, puffed out its spleen and strode gently toward him.
For the first time, Sig had the urge to run, but his kneecap was drying up and his legs refused to move.
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