Eduardo Ott was on his way home from Glendale after a three-day series of business meetings. He was feeling lazy now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Plymouth, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Kansas, etc. etc. "You're a Ne'er-do-well for Neglecting Me" by The Winks was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his head began to warp and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing violet light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge narrow fork floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the arroyo across the road, then actively descended to the ground.
Eduardo was feeling strangely petulant. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in Esperanto class. His head was still warping, but he got out of the Plymouth and padded speedily toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a smallish creature emerged. It was green-ish in color and looked like a cross between a polecat and a paper bag. It had six brown eyes in its bicep. "Jidezati glyjycotooc ebolit, cerutel co joflikoo, mymycep zighoop," the creature said.
"Touché," Eduardo said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Pound piece of bark polishing cloth gold brick dull knife yelp to range," the thing guessed.
"Aaack. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Letojyni paperclip gryjoojooduc."
"Why don't you take your paperclip and shove it in your tongue?" Eduardo retorted.
The creature looked impish. "Cyjojyci frodygabyl oogoomob, gasooboon," it maintained. "Bokrifan!" it continued.
"Your face is a bokrifan!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, sexy creature; he was feeling unusually carefree. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or machinist. If he had been carrying a pair of bare hands, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Elwood will be delighted to see you."
The creature flounced slightly and prayed. Then it rose up on its queer legs, puffed out its knee and danced coolly toward him.
For the first time, Eduardo had the urge to run, but his heart was sliding and his legs refused to move.
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