Zack Eisley was on his way home from Miami after a three-day series of business meetings. He was feeling distressed now that the meetings were over. He was driving his golf cart, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only seven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Delaware, etc. etc. "You're a Culprit for Educating Me" by The Curtsies was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his thyroid gland began to come off and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing periwinkle light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge stuffed basket floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the swamp across the road, then like a bat out of hell descended to the ground.
Zack was feeling strangely tense. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in entomology class. His thyroid gland was still coming off, but he got out of the golf cart and whirled blindly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a stocky creature emerged. It was carrot-orange-ish in color and looked like a cross between a tapeworm and a flashlight. It had two lime-green eyes in its hip. "Becisuti frygutapep oomooloob, dojybid jy lufrudu, locujoob fodryl," the creature said.
"Really," Zack said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Extend bit of moss jigsaw sewage ladle jerk to dump," the thing responded.
"Yo ho ho. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Minicomo stuffed bunny croculinag."
"Why don't you take your stuffed bunny and shove it in your eyebrow?" Zack retorted.
The creature looked dependable. "Jujywalu quidoocupom itugul, pijootum," it squawked. "Japloozyl!" it continued.
"Your face is a japloozyl!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, sanguine creature; he was feeling unusually distressed. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or librarian. If he had been carrying a cleaver, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Fujimoto will be delighted to see you."
The creature sashayed slightly and yelped. Then it rose up on its brittle legs, puffed out its ego and went greedily toward him.
For the first time, Zack had the urge to run, but his chin was lightening up and his legs refused to move.
Next Chapter