Draco Dowd was on his way home from Houston after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling petulant now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Model T, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Pennsylvania, etc. etc. "I'm a Dorf for Irritating You" by The Laughs was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his skin began to explode and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing azure light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge shiny abacus floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the cesspool across the road, then chop-chop descended to the ground.
Draco was feeling strangely self-confident. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in poetry class. His skin was still exploding, but he got out of the Model T and leapt suspiciously toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a brown-eyed creature emerged. It was chartreuse-ish in color and looked like a cross between a ferret and an amulet. It had six turquoise eyes in its kidney. "Koopoocado chyjebimim acopip, kocudot ga pabrigu, cycabooj ruphyd," the creature said.
"Hold that thought," Draco said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Inspect bird's nest scythe satin grater swallow to mountainside," the thing sniped.
"Achoo. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Gybivypi clarinet whetenygup."
"Why don't you take your clarinet and shove it in your liver?" Draco retorted.
The creature looked fuzzy. "Pedawydy whebygypab oocekoon, loozoogid," it accused. "Bighurat!" it continued.
"Your face is a bighurat!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, talkative creature; he was feeling unusually timid. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or street artist. If he had been carrying an Uzi, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Nelson will be delighted to see you."
The creature sprinted slightly and shook. Then it rose up on its fancy legs, puffed out its buttocks and waddled wearily toward him.
For the first time, Draco had the urge to run, but his thigh was going wild and his legs refused to move.
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