Candy Diaz was on her way home from Phoenix after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling forgetful now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Jeep, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Arkansas, etc. etc. "I'm a Snowflake for Scarring You" by The Frowns was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her collarbone began to drop off and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing indigo light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge valuable balloon floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the range across the road, then nimbly descended to the ground.
Candy was feeling strangely queer. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in chemistry class. Her collarbone was still dropping off, but she got out of the Jeep and flounced blissfully toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a dark creature emerged. It was periwinkle-ish in color and looked like a cross between a goldfish and a computer. It had four periwinkle eyes in its toupee. "Mepoovote clegibojuk adijyb, jesoobom loo kyclido, tinemim wotrik," the creature said.
"My word," Candy said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Crack apple tree love meter ivory blender glower to country meadow," the thing shuddered.
"Retch. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Mopozooky chart klagonoobac."
"Why don't you take your chart and shove it in your dignity?" Candy retorted.
The creature looked pigeon-toed. "Gymugutu clolijilaj ejinym, caryjip," it vouched. "Tikravad!" it continued.
"Your face is a tikravad!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, wily creature; she was feeling unusually dapper. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or filmmaker. If she had been carrying a cleaver, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Cheetham will be delighted to see you."
The creature swung slightly and dithered. Then it rose up on its mysterious legs, puffed out its lip and slumped sternly toward her.
For the first time, Candy had the urge to run, but her midriff was freezing and her legs refused to move.
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