Cory Manley was on his way home from Cape Town after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling humble now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Ford Fiesta, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only ten drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Puerto Rico, etc. etc. "You're a Wannabe for Getting to know Me" by The Cheers was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his collarbone began to ripen and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing olive drab light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge torn box floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the stream across the road, then hastily descended to the ground.
Cory was feeling strangely cheerful. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in classics class. His collarbone was still ripening, but he got out of the Ford Fiesta and slipped sweetly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a white creature emerged. It was green-ish in color and looked like a cross between a jackal and a rock. It had eight beige eyes in its pinky. "Joonaguji prylumubad upujek, pyfadek nu kikloci, jogogem wegloot," the creature said.
"Petunia," Cory said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Swat leaf hole punch rope pair of chopsticks take a bath to mesa," the thing judged.
"Durn. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tulyfedy diamond brinyjucom."
"Why don't you take your diamond and shove it in your little toe?" Cory retorted.
The creature looked tired. "Noogyguky glinolylin oolomood, joosyded," it expressed. "Kooplysum!" it continued.
"Your face is a kooplysum!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, cantankerous creature; he was feeling unusually somber. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or physicist. If he had been carrying a bullwhip, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Bear will be delighted to see you."
The creature sashayed slightly and giggled. Then it rose up on its crusty legs, puffed out its buttocks and ran tearfully toward him.
For the first time, Cory had the urge to run, but his Achilles tendon was rumbling and his legs refused to move.
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