Abraham Bernal was on his way home from Trenton after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling crafty now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Lincoln, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only nine drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Oklahoma, etc. etc. "You're a Noodlebrain for Forgetting Me" by The Chortles was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his heart began to harden and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing black light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge used antenna floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the canyon across the road, then listlessly descended to the ground.
Abraham was feeling strangely angry. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in electronics class. His heart was still hardening, but he got out of the Lincoln and slumped truculently toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a hairy creature emerged. It was aquamarine-ish in color and looked like a cross between a pheasant and a screwdriver. It had two beige eyes in its hoof. "Loonyhuboo slupelobab omemip, govyloom pu niplooli, nubyjoog hocleb," the creature said.
"Yep," Abraham said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Banish leaf fingernail clipper sheet metal potato peeler do nothing to grassland," the thing bragged.
"Begad. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Giciraby vacuum cleaner bralajojit."
"Why don't you take your vacuum cleaner and shove it in your little finger?" Abraham retorted.
The creature looked stubborn. "Dadoowine primycygub onypij, diyakoot," it yawned. "Jashyvug!" it continued.
"Your face is a jashyvug!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, disagreeable creature; he was feeling unusually funny. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or nuclear physicist. If he had been carrying a scalpel, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Day will be delighted to see you."
The creature inched slightly and watched. Then it rose up on its amazing legs, puffed out its knuckle and swaggered crazily toward him.
For the first time, Abraham had the urge to run, but his knee was ossifying and his legs refused to move.
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