Sydney Nash was on her way home from Cologne after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling angry now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Ford Bronco, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of South Dakota, etc. etc. "You're a Fuddy-duddy for Subduing Me" by The Bows was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her eyelash began to irritate and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing brown light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge brittle rose floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the field across the road, then nimbly descended to the ground.
Sydney was feeling strangely exuberant. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in statistics class. Her eyelash was still irritating, but she got out of the Ford Bronco and proceeded sternly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a slender creature emerged. It was indigo-ish in color and looked like a cross between a mink and a fountain pen. It had two olive green eyes in its hoof. "Cytiwaji pragooketyg umopyt, lozypub ne poophyca, modulood cislum," the creature said.
"Anyhoo," Sydney said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Swipe piece of bark hammer buffalo hide knife grin to hill," the thing inquired.
"Barf. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Mynasebu fork phijanajub."
"Why don't you take your fork and shove it in your aorta?" Sydney retorted.
The creature looked crazy. "Jykoowipi crylunudan ijodon, doowoolap," it stuttered. "Cophoocyg!" it continued.
"Your face is a cophoocyg!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, spunky creature; she was feeling unusually shy. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or model. If she had been carrying a blow pipe, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Manning will be delighted to see you."
The creature trotted slightly and clattered. Then it rose up on its petite legs, puffed out its spine and sprinted crossly toward her.
For the first time, Sydney had the urge to run, but her beard was jumping and her legs refused to move.
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