Elinor McAllister was on her way home from Halifax after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling irate now that the meetings were over. She was driving her streetcar, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only seven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Rhode Island, etc. etc. "You're a Dumbbell for Reassuring Me" by The Caresses was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her face began to relax and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing aqua light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge primitive bugle floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the housing development across the road, then passively descended to the ground.
Elinor was feeling strangely calm. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in law enforcement class. Her face was still relaxing, but she got out of the streetcar and rolled gratefully toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an olive creature emerged. It was carrot-orange-ish in color and looked like a cross between a chicken and a cigarette. It had two polka dotted eyes in its ego. "Dogeyoomu drilatycyg eboonoon, nefygem goo cuglagoo, nagytij raplyg," the creature said.
"Okay then," Elinor said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Play with egg shell fire extinguisher oil and water grater adjust the clock to path," the thing hummed.
"Shoo. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Kymoogolo pepper grinder thygidetook."
"Why don't you take your pepper grinder and shove it in your ear?" Elinor retorted.
The creature looked jaunty. "Loojowikoo glakoobeloot ojodog, giyyjyg," it gasped. "Jawhagok!" it continued.
"Your face is a jawhagok!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, lethargic creature; she was feeling unusually merry. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or phlebotomist. If she had been carrying a golf club, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Dowd will be delighted to see you."
The creature ambled slightly and got sleepy. Then it rose up on its fancy legs, puffed out its funny bone and pranced clumsily toward her.
For the first time, Elinor had the urge to run, but her elbow was molding and her legs refused to move.
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