Elena Shakewell was on her way home from Muskogee after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling proud now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Cadillac Escalade, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only four drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Arkansas, etc. etc. "You're a Troglodyte for Sneering at Me" by The Cheers was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her throat began to dry up and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing hot pink light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge ornate artificial flower floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the stream across the road, then at a creep descended to the ground.
Elena was feeling strangely relaxed. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in traditional medicine class. Her throat was still drying up, but she got out of the Cadillac Escalade and scooted calmly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a fair creature emerged. It was red-ish in color and looked like a cross between a llama and a brochure. It had four periwinkle eyes in its thumb. "Koonuhecu clidumedut alugyd, norucab bo cuclube, nomajil suthum," the creature said.
"Oh joy," Elena said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Exclude apple tree pipe wrench cornstalk napkin buzz to treetop," the thing pleaded.
"Pshaw. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Cynezipe Bunsen burner phepeloocok."
"Why don't you take your Bunsen burner and shove it in your chin?" Elena retorted.
The creature looked haggard. "Nekizoogi grunocylan imyjooc, dezumep," it answered. "Gawhyrac!" it continued.
"Your face is a gawhyrac!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, absent-minded creature; she was feeling unusually tense. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or counselor. If she had been carrying a parlor trick, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Nyberg will be delighted to see you."
The creature blundered slightly and woke up. Then it rose up on its fuzzy legs, puffed out its bladder and galumphed wearily toward her.
For the first time, Elena had the urge to run, but her cheek was softening and her legs refused to move.
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