Ada Belle Loring was on her way home from Corona after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling woozy now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Hummer, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only three drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of West Virginia, etc. etc. "I'm a Hooligan for Reassuring You" by The Raspberries was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her toenail began to get moldy and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing carrot-orange light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge ruined baton floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the lagoon across the road, then at a crawl descended to the ground.
Ada Belle was feeling strangely cuddly. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in information science class. Her toenail was still getting moldy, but she got out of the Hummer and crawled proudly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a lean creature emerged. It was fuchsia-ish in color and looked like a cross between a mole and a ball. It had two tan eyes in its eyeball. "Mynygydi wrydapinut imilop, juhemoom ji dacrajoo, bydidyt vakrij," the creature said.
"Yippee," Ada Belle said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Unfasten bird's nest punch lace wooden spoon hang around to river," the thing orated.
"Piffle. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pigyhoocy vase glibiloodooj."
"Why don't you take your vase and shove it in your knee?" Ada Belle retorted.
The creature looked serious. "Jycefyke krojebybon obojul, kesetej," it boomed. "Kaglizoc!" it continued.
"Your face is a kaglizoc!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, apoplectic creature; she was feeling unusually sassy. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or contractor. If she had been carrying a six-shooter, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President David will be delighted to see you."
The creature straggled slightly and digested. Then it rose up on its fluffy legs, puffed out its skin and straggled delicately toward her.
For the first time, Ada Belle had the urge to run, but her funny bone was awakening and her legs refused to move.
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