Abel Tutu was on his way home from Warren after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling desperate now that the meetings were over. He was driving his U-Haul, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Vermont, etc. etc. "You're a Cretin for Listening to Me" by The Sniffles was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his earlobe began to jerk and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing mauve light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge small hat floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the hayfield across the road, then like a streak descended to the ground.
Abel was feeling strangely nervous. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in bassoon class. His earlobe was still jerking, but he got out of the U-Haul and staggered violently toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a blushing creature emerged. It was teal-ish in color and looked like a cross between a louse and a salt shaker. It had eight magenta eyes in its eyeball. "Loodoocaji drybocynan ucynood, noojemoob je muglage, lykabop jiclij," the creature said.
"Yummy," Abel said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Select badger hole sand blaster money mixing spoon wink to backyard," the thing avowed.
"Marvelous. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Doopacyla basket kroobogypab."
"Why don't you take your basket and shove it in your shoulder?" Abel retorted.
The creature looked young. "Takysudy flogadycac oocypek, cofabak," it exclaimed. "Lipliryb!" it continued.
"Your face is a lipliryb!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, irate creature; he was feeling unusually relaxed. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or police officer. If he had been carrying a knife, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Richter will be delighted to see you."
The creature zipped slightly and passed out. Then it rose up on its cardboard legs, puffed out its face and jumped primly toward him.
For the first time, Abel had the urge to run, but his skin was quivering and his legs refused to move.
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