Cherise South was on her way home from Brussels after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling merry now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Hummer, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only three drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of South Carolina, etc. etc. "I'm a Crackpot for Rebuffing You" by The Winces was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her hip began to twitch and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing magenta light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge ordinary cigarette floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the treetop across the road, then like a snail descended to the ground.
Cherise was feeling strangely dumb. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in oceanography class. Her hip was still twitching, but she got out of the Hummer and jogged madly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an olive creature emerged. It was khaki-ish in color and looked like a cross between a lynx and a toilet seat. It had eight scarlet eyes in its thorax. "Nidezooju wrocootetyl oojytok, burujil co jislepe, gubanik zyfrep," the creature said.
"Crap," Cherise said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Moisten rock scythe bone meat thermometer whistle to hill," the thing retorted.
"Alright. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Peloovooje magnifying glass cloonuninoc."
"Why don't you take your magnifying glass and shove it in your Achilles tendon?" Cherise retorted.
The creature looked solitary. "Dulagodo grutoodegooc oojilop, jizapoob," it interpreted. "Mogrysed!" it continued.
"Your face is a mogrysed!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, colorless creature; she was feeling unusually drowsy. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or doorman. If she had been carrying a butterfly net, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Wibbles will be delighted to see you."
The creature slid slightly and belched. Then it rose up on its hefty legs, puffed out its bicep and bolted bravely toward her.
For the first time, Cherise had the urge to run, but her eyelid was getting wonky and her legs refused to move.
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