Tori Owens was on her way home from Rio de Janiero after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling maniacal now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Bentley, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only three drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of California, etc. etc. "I'm a Turkey for Jumping on You" by The Growls was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her foot began to stink and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing hot pink light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge torn rose floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the glen across the road, then easily descended to the ground.
Tori was feeling strangely distressed. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in obedience class. Her foot was still stinking, but she got out of the Bentley and zipped nimbly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a plump creature emerged. It was turquoise-ish in color and looked like a cross between a grizzly bear and a paper towel. It had two olive green eyes in its calf. "Poonafyloo klikokigat oocigig, tuzepin ta pyghula, kicugap sedroob," the creature said.
"For cryin' out loud," Tori said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Banish cactus saw candy candy thermometer sleep to prairie," the thing queried.
"Woops. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Jalujigu pink flamingo wrygetyloob."
"Why don't you take your pink flamingo and shove it in your lip?" Tori retorted.
The creature looked spindly. "Boolivokoo phimydemic upykik, narugam," it argued. "Byplahit!" it continued.
"Your face is a byplahit!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, poised creature; she was feeling unusually drowsy. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or bureaucrat. If she had been carrying a mosquito net, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Rodriguez will be delighted to see you."
The creature sashayed slightly and flushed. Then it rose up on its queer legs, puffed out its liver and hobbled immediately toward her.
For the first time, Tori had the urge to run, but her skin was stinging and her legs refused to move.
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