Tara Cunningham was on her way home from Garden Grove after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling confident now that the meetings were over. She was driving her forklift, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eleven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of South Carolina, etc. etc. "I'm a Punk for Leaving You" by The Grimaces was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her tummy began to redden and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing aquamarine light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge magnificent hubcap floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the river across the road, then eagerly descended to the ground.
Tara was feeling strangely sarcastic. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in the alphabet class. Her tummy was still reddening, but she got out of the forklift and zipped later toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an alert creature emerged. It was green-ish in color and looked like a cross between a mare and a paperweight. It had four mauve eyes in its thigh. "Lonayooli ghulakemyl ubepik, duhabooj ce jakliby, pycijoot jecren," the creature said.
"Castor and Pollux! Blow me to Bermuda," Tara said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Leave feather tape measure Spanish moss ladle show up to backyard," the thing noted.
"Petunia. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Copuzuda toilet seat quedylibook."
"Why don't you take your toilet seat and shove it in your scalp?" Tara retorted.
The creature looked monstrous. "Takozogu trupenigem eboonooj, gyvitoot," it crooned. "Licryzib!" it continued.
"Your face is a licryzib!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, vivacious creature; she was feeling unusually frantic. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or ballroom dancer. If she had been carrying a battle axe, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Mittal will be delighted to see you."
The creature dove slightly and wiggled. Then it rose up on its handy legs, puffed out its chin and loped brightly toward her.
For the first time, Tara had the urge to run, but her hangnail was growing hair and her legs refused to move.
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