Sadie Brooks was on her way home from Davenport after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling cantankerous now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Volkswagen Passat, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only seven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Massachusetts, etc. etc. "You're a Ninnyhammer for Making a face at Me" by The Grimaces was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her horn began to gurgle and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing mauve light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge amazing toilet seat floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the bog across the road, then quietly descended to the ground.
Sadie was feeling strangely maniacal. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in subtraction class. Her horn was still gurgling, but she got out of the Volkswagen Passat and dashed suspiciously toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a dapper creature emerged. It was sparkly-ish in color and looked like a cross between a parrot and a vase. It had six mauve eyes in its claw. "Mygijejy brejeloobyl oonycam, dogooboj ti kebredi, belepet cootron," the creature said.
"Amen," Sadie said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Understand feather bolt cutter Sheetrock potato peeler get frazzled to oasis," the thing declared.
"Whoopee. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Nemuyupo key thanacutoog."
"Why don't you take your key and shove it in your waist?" Sadie retorted.
The creature looked creepy. "Mootahoodoo quojekejeb idydol, pijanon," it imitated. "Bislooyooc!" it continued.
"Your face is a bislooyooc!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, fearful creature; she was feeling unusually brave. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or errand runner. If she had been carrying a squirt gun, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Adler will be delighted to see you."
The creature dove slightly and sniffled. Then it rose up on its hard legs, puffed out its finger and dove gleefully toward her.
For the first time, Sadie had the urge to run, but her shoulder was spreading and her legs refused to move.
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