Marty LaSalle was on his way home from Santiago after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling peckish now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Dodge Viper, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only three drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Georgia, etc. etc. "I'm a Simpleton for Jabbing You" by The Stiff upper lips was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his toenail began to act weird and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing indigo light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge colossal biscuit floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the dumpster across the road, then like a bat out of hell descended to the ground.
Marty was feeling strangely furious. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in musicianship class. His toenail was still acting weird, but he got out of the Dodge Viper and sneaked boisterously toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an emaciated creature emerged. It was amber-ish in color and looked like a cross between a jaguar and a peanut. It had two forest green eyes in its nose. "Pigocado froodobamom acukood, cigapok di byfrijo, polimoop yaphec," the creature said.
"Grrrrr," Marty said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Curl tree laser beam cellophane spatula vegetate to moonscape," the thing warbled.
"Boo. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Monahooda telephone book krudetulyj."
"Why don't you take your telephone book and shove it in your nose?" Marty retorted.
The creature looked dowdy. "Jatijidu flamoopobud ukijam, pusycep," it asserted. "Pocruhyg!" it continued.
"Your face is a pocruhyg!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, passionate creature; he was feeling unusually fearless. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or chef. If he had been carrying a weed whacker, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Johnson will be delighted to see you."
The creature blundered slightly and came to. Then it rose up on its frilly legs, puffed out its throat and tumbled crankily toward him.
For the first time, Marty had the urge to run, but his brain was withering and his legs refused to move.
Next Chapter