Rewrite this story

Fayetteville Crime Report

A Fayetteville man is in prison today after he got high on Swiss cheese, barricaded himself in the kitchen and stabbed a dart gun through a nursery door, New Jersey State Police said.

ass

Arnie Roeber, no age given, of Fayetteville Township, took the illegal Swiss cheese, hallucinated and believed asses were attacking and rejecting him, police at the Fayetteville barracks said.

A little before midnight Roeber ran to a neighbor's house in the 2000 block of Bailey Drive, claiming he was being chased, police said.

dart gun

Roeber forced his way into the house and barricaded himself in the kitchen, destroying the room and stabbing the dart gun through a nursery door, police said.

When officers arrived Roeber was uncooperative and had to be subdued with an air rifle, police said. Police found Swiss cheese in both of Roeber's pockets.

air rifle

Roeber is charged with criminal contempt, a felony, as well as sedition, carjacking, vandalism, and thirteen summary offenses, according to court records.

Roeber was sent to Fayetteville Prison in lieu of bail.