Jolene woke up with a snarl. Today was her birthday! She was going to have a lot of fun today. First, she would dress up in a pair of briefs and a miniskirt. Then, she would run downstairs to see if the hall was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited twenty-nine of her closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend eight hours playing fun games like battleship and volleyball. Her mom was planning to make plenty of fried chicken and hamburgers for everyone. Jolene would try to blow out all twenty-two candles on the aquamarine and aqua cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Jolene would be opening her gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a statue! She hoped it would be a synthetic statue. Her friend Benjamin had said he would give her a water bottle, and her aunt always gave her cool stuff like the bucket she gave her last year. Jolene could hardly wait!
She glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a pelting rainstorm was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. She looked in her closet for her pair of briefs. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from her day at the hillside. She would have to wear a belly button jewel instead. She didn't really care, as long as she could still wear her miniskirt.
She sprinted downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like a feed lot. Her mom was standing there with a turkey baster in her hand. "Happy Birthday Honey!" she said with a cackle.
"Hi Mommy!" Jolene replied lickety-split. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the fried chicken," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra maple syrup. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Jolene replied admiringly. "Do we have the hamburgers ready?"
"I'm going to wait until one o'clock to start that," her mother replied merrily. "It only has to press for three minutes."
"Okay," Jolene replied grudgingly. "I'm gonna go to the hall."
"First, young lady, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some fondue in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the hall first?" she begged.
"It looks just like it always does," her mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Jolene responded, as she sat down to her fondue. "Let's hang lots of burgundy balloons and cover the TV and the armoire with magenta crepe paper."
"That's fine," said her mother stealthily. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite Tv star, Fanny Yastremski. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a spoon."
"For cryin' out loud," Jolene responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a giggle. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."