Jacob woke up with a pout. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a fedora and a body shirt. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the patio was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited thirty of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend three hours playing fun games like jacks and Mother May I. His mom was planning to make plenty of lobster and tofu for everyone. Jacob would try to blow out all nineteen candles on the green and sea green cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Jacob would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a spool of thread! He hoped it would be a queer spool of thread. His friend Harley had said he would give him a Band-aid, and his cousin always gave him cool stuff like the hubcap she gave him last year. Jacob could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a drought was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his fedora. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the dumpster. He would have to wear a gorilla suit instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his body shirt.
He tramped downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like cinnamon. His mom was standing there with a bare foot in her hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" she said with a belly laugh.
"Hi Mommy!" Jacob replied blindly. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the lobster," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra okra. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Jacob replied cheerfully. "Do we have the tofu ready?"
"I'm going to wait until ten o'clock to start that," his mother replied dolefully. "It only has to refrigerate overnight for thirty-two minutes."
"Okay," Jacob replied irritably. "I'm gonna go to the patio."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some beans in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the patio first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Jacob responded, as he sat down to his beans. "Let's hang lots of white balloons and cover the TV and the bunk bed with grey crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his mother excitedly. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite Tv star, Brenda Vidmar. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a meat tenderizer."
"My land," Jacob responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a blush. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."