Alisa woke up with an evil eye. Today was her birthday! She was going to have a lot of fun today. First, she would dress up in a bridal gown and a pair of overalls. Then, she would run downstairs to see if the outhouse was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited three of her closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend four hours playing fun games like volleyball and pool. Her mom was planning to make plenty of sauerkraut and roast turkey for everyone. Alisa would try to blow out all thirty-one candles on the emerald green and brown cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Alisa would be opening her gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a cane! She hoped it would be a greasy cane. Her friend Giovanni had said he would give her a napkin, and her girlfriend always gave her cool stuff like the model airplane she gave her last year. Alisa could hardly wait!
She glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a sandstorm was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. She looked in her closet for her bridal gown. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from her day at the hill. She would have to wear a bedsheet instead. She didn't really care, as long as she could still wear her pair of overalls.
She sashayed downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like rotten potatoes. Her mom was standing there with a potato peeler in her hand. "Happy Birthday Honey!" she said with a wag of the finger.
"Hi Mommy!" Alisa replied stealthily. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the sauerkraut," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra kosher salt. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Alisa replied delicately. "Do we have the roast turkey ready?"
"I'm going to wait until five o'clock to start that," her mother replied delicately. "It only has to grill for seven minutes."
"Okay," Alisa replied boldly. "I'm gonna go to the outhouse."
"First, young lady, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some tortillas in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the outhouse first?" she begged.
"It looks just like it always does," her mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Alisa responded, as she sat down to her tortillas. "Let's hang lots of green balloons and cover the bed and the china cabinet with lavender crepe paper."
"That's fine," said her mother majestically. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite Tv star, Brook Queens. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a food processor."
"Gee," Alisa responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a laugh. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."