Marya woke up with a dope slap. Today was her birthday! She was going to have a lot of fun today. First, she would dress up in a stovepipe hat and a gas mask. Then, she would run downstairs to see if the solarium was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited seventeen of her closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend six hours playing fun games like treasure hunt and bridge. Her mom was planning to make plenty of Froot Loops and cinnamon toast for everyone. Marya would try to blow out all nineteen candles on the scarlet and periwinkle cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Marya would be opening her gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a Helmholz resonator! She hoped it would be a loose Helmholz resonator. Her friend Jude had said he would give her a plaque, and her wife always gave her cool stuff like the banana she gave her last year. Marya could hardly wait!
She glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a hailstorm was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. She looked in her closet for her stovepipe hat. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from her day at the mountaintop. She would have to wear a sweater instead. She didn't really care, as long as she could still wear her gas mask.
She capered downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like a wet dog. Her mom was standing there with a food processor in her hand. "Happy Birthday Honey!" she said with a dope slap.
"Hi Mommy!" Marya replied stupidly. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the Froot Loops," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra roast beef. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Marya replied suavely. "Do we have the cinnamon toast ready?"
"I'm going to wait until four o'clock to start that," her mother replied shakily. "It only has to sear outside for eighty-seven minutes."
"Okay," Marya replied lamely. "I'm gonna go to the solarium."
"First, young lady, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some succotash in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the solarium first?" she begged.
"It looks just like it always does," her mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Marya responded, as she sat down to her succotash. "Let's hang lots of red balloons and cover the washing machine and the canopy bed with blue crepe paper."
"That's fine," said her mother confidently. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite singer, Melissa Hruska. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a pair of chopsticks."
"Yowie," Marya responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a wag of the finger. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."