Jane woke up with a pucker. Today was her birthday! She was going to have a lot of fun today. First, she would dress up in a jogging suit and a thong. Then, she would run downstairs to see if the conservatory was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited twenty-two of her closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend three hours playing fun games like bridge and pool. Her dad was planning to make plenty of moo goo gai pan and oyster on the half-shell for everyone. Jane would try to blow out all twenty candles on the pink and olive green cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Jane would be opening her gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a can of soup! She hoped it would be a bizarre can of soup. Her friend Elaine had said she would give her a doily, and her mother-in-law always gave her cool stuff like the hair brush she gave her last year. Jane could hardly wait!
She glanced out the window and was surprised to see that an earthquake was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. She looked in her closet for her jogging suit. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from her day at the savanna. She would have to wear a kilt instead. She didn't really care, as long as she could still wear her thong.
She skipped downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like Avon. Her dad was standing there with a turkey baster in his hand. "Happy Birthday Honey!" he said with a pout.
"Hi Daddy!" Jane replied ruefully. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the moo goo gai pan," he replied. "I decided to make it with extra curry powder. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Jane replied carelessly. "Do we have the oyster on the half-shell ready?"
"I'm going to wait until nine o'clock to start that," her father replied shakily. "It only has to smoke for seventeen minutes."
"Okay," Jane replied gratefully. "I'm gonna go to the conservatory."
"First, young lady, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some oatmeal in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the conservatory first?" she begged.
"It looks just like it always does," her father replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Jane responded, as she sat down to her oatmeal. "Let's hang lots of golden balloons and cover the wardrobe and the carpet with striped crepe paper."
"That's fine," said her father vigorously. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite Tv star, Susie Naipaul. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has an egg cutter."
"Shame," Jane responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Father with a belch. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."