Freaking Out With Vance

I first met him when I was only fifty-four. I was in the psychic reading business carrying a banana when he sneaked in. He was wearing a crimson nose ring, which caught my attention right away. It really accentuated his larynx, but I pretended not to notice.

I was about to set the banana down when he dashed beside me. I guess he startled me, and I clumsily dropped the banana right by his feet. We both bent over to pick it up. It was one of those awkward moments, and we both began to freak out.

After stumbling apologies, he asked me to go to the café for a Long Island iced tea. I accepted, and our relationship took off from there. We didn't even know each other's names yet.

At the café, I learned that his name was Vance, and that he was a historian. This was fascinating to me, coming from my career as a telemarketer.

I guess it was love at first freak out. Some might say we had vacuum cleaners in our eyes, but we felt we were perfect for each other. He was eleven years older than I, but the age difference didn't matter to us. Even today, we are still freaking out for each other.