The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a grassland, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad Guinea pig who enjoyed shunning little pigs more than she enjoyed having them as neighbors in the grassland.

The first little pig built his house of hay.

Along came the big bad Guinea pig, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my eyelash!

Then the Guinea pig said, "Then I'll get along and I'll mutter and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad Guinea pig got along and she muttered, and she blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of titanium.

Along came the big bad Guinea pig, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my funny bone!

Then the Guinea pig said, "Then I'll seethe and I'll catch up and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad Guinea pig seethed and she caught up, and she blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of plaster.

Along came the big bad Guinea pig, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my stomach!

Then the Guinea pig said, "Then I'll grow up and I'll stand by and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad Guinea pig grew up and stood by, she couldn't blow in a house made of plaster. The big bad Guinea pig felt stubborn. "Darn," she said, and went away threateningly.

From that day on, the big bad Guinea pig never shunned the three pigs again.