The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a treetop, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad muskrat who enjoyed seeing little pigs more than she enjoyed having them as neighbors in the treetop.

The first little pig built his house of plaster.

Along came the big bad muskrat, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my spinal cord!

Then the muskrat said, "Then I'll belch and I'll leer and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad muskrat belched and she leered, and she blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of hair.

Along came the big bad muskrat, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my little toe!

Then the muskrat said, "Then I'll pucker and I'll go limp and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad muskrat puckered and she went limp, and she blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of chewing gum.

Along came the big bad muskrat, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my eyebrow!

Then the muskrat said, "Then I'll peep and I'll huff and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad muskrat peeped and huffed, she couldn't blow in a house made of chewing gum. The big bad muskrat felt brazen. "Doggone," she said, and went away queerly.

From that day on, the big bad muskrat never saw the three pigs again.