The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live on a prairie, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad newt who enjoyed writing little pigs more than she enjoyed having them as neighbors on the prairie.

The first little pig built his house of hay.

Along came the big bad newt, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my mouth!

Then the newt said, "Then I'll kneel and I'll do the Hokey Pokey and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad newt knelt and she did the Hokey Pokey, and she blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of manure.

Along came the big bad newt, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my tummy!

Then the newt said, "Then I'll applaud and I'll dress up and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad newt applauded and she dressed up, and she blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of junk cars.

Along came the big bad newt, and she said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my eyelash!

Then the newt said, "Then I'll sigh and I'll belch and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad newt sighed and belched, she couldn't blow in a house made of junk cars. The big bad newt felt brave. "Hmm," she said, and went away lightly.

From that day on, the big bad newt never wrote the three pigs again.