The Three Little Pigs

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs who wanted to live in a grassland, but first they needed to build their houses. Down the road from the three little pigs lived a big bad sheep who enjoyed understanding little pigs more than he enjoyed having them as neighbors in the grassland.

The first little pig built his house of oil and water.

Along came the big bad sheep, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The first little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my toenail!

Then the sheep said, "Then I'll pucker and I'll pucker and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad sheep puckered and he puckered, and he blew the first little pig's house in.

The second little pig built his house of iron.

Along came the big bad sheep, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The second little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my intestine!

Then the sheep said, "Then I'll die and I'll itch and I'll blow your house in."

And the big bad sheep died and he itched, and he blew the second little pig's house in.

The third little pig built his house of bronze.

Along came the big bad sheep, and he said, "Little Pig, Little Pig, let me come in!"

The third little pig replied, "Not by the hair of my kneecap!

Then the sheep said, "Then I'll clear out and I'll murmur and I'll blow your house in."

But no matter how much the big bad sheep cleared out and murmured, he couldn't blow in a house made of bronze. The big bad sheep felt peculiar. "Par bleu," he said, and went away truculently.

From that day on, the big bad sheep never understood the three pigs again.