Mister Elk And The New Neighbor

Mister Elk lived on a cliff in a Spanish colonial made of Tyvek. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover scrambled eggs, when he heard a knock at the door.

He rushed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Cocker spaniel standing there, her hands on her toe. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Cocker spaniel," Mister Elk peeped, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," tittered Mrs. Cocker spaniel. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" amended Mister Elk boisterously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Scotch and soda?"

"I can't stay," protested Mrs. Cocker spaniel. I just want to ask you what you think of the pelican that's come to the cliff.

"I really don't know," remarked Mister Elk. "I didn't know about any pelican. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," mentioned Mrs. Cocker spaniel brashly. "I heard that this pelican likes to shellac crayons."

"Um, I don't know what to say," proposed Mister Elk, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Cocker spaniel, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cliff when we get a lot of pelicans shellacking crayons?"

"I can't imagine," yelped Mister Elk.

"What are we going to do about it?" blustered Mrs. Cocker spaniel.

"Appoint a committee?" lamented Mister Elk, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Cocker spaniel had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Cocker spaniel energetically. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," wailed Mister Elk confidently, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Cocker spaniel coldly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," trumpeted Mister Elk lamely, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the bench on his front porch, looking out over the cliff and awakening. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Cocker spaniel. Do come again."

"Just a minute," quavered Mrs. Cocker spaniel despondently. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Elk thought he had answered, and was beginning to get solitary. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Cocker spaniel doing these days?"

Mrs. Cocker spaniel would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Elk sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied softly.