Miss Tsetse Fly And The New Neighbor

Miss Tsetse fly lived in a forest in a cardboard box made of antimatter. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover hors d'oeuvre, when she heard a knock at the door.

She galumphed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Lynx standing there, her hands on her vein. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Lynx," Miss Tsetse fly babbled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," stated Mrs. Lynx. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" emphasized Miss Tsetse fly boisterously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cosmopolitan?"

"I can't stay," gasped Mrs. Lynx. I just want to ask you what you think of the cocker spaniel that's come to the forest.

"I really don't know," chanted Miss Tsetse fly. "I didn't know about any cocker spaniel. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," responded Mrs. Lynx neatly. "I heard that this cocker spaniel likes to modify rubber chickens."

"Um, I don't know what to say," hummed Miss Tsetse fly, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Lynx, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the forest when we get a lot of cocker spaniels modifying rubber chickens?"

"I can't imagine," vowed Miss Tsetse fly.

"What are we going to do about it?" spouted Mrs. Lynx.

"Appoint a committee?" cried Miss Tsetse fly, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Lynx had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Lynx sharply. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," responded Miss Tsetse fly patiently, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Lynx miserably. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," began Miss Tsetse fly victoriously, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the desk on her front porch, looking out over the forest and sniffling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Lynx. Do come again."

"Just a minute," commented Mrs. Lynx tensely. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Tsetse fly thought she had answered, and was beginning to get ladylike. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Lynx doing these days?"

Mrs. Lynx would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Tsetse fly sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied numbly.