Miss Bandicoot And The New Neighbor

Miss Bandicoot lived on a trail in a mud hut made of duct tape. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover pretzels, when she heard a knock at the door.

She skipped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Siamese cat standing there, her hands on her heel. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Siamese cat," Miss Bandicoot blubbered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," pronounced Mrs. Siamese cat. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" grunted Miss Bandicoot pitifully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you an Irish Coffee?"

"I can't stay," opined Mrs. Siamese cat. I just want to ask you what you think of the rabbit that's come to the trail.

"I really don't know," opined Miss Bandicoot. "I didn't know about any rabbit. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," squealed Mrs. Siamese cat fervently. "I heard that this rabbit likes to plasticize napkins."

"Um, I don't know what to say," voiced Miss Bandicoot, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Siamese cat, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the trail when we get a lot of rabbits plasticizing napkins?"

"I can't imagine," blurted Miss Bandicoot.

"What are we going to do about it?" phrased Mrs. Siamese cat.

"Appoint a committee?" growled Miss Bandicoot, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Siamese cat had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Siamese cat roughly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," burbled Miss Bandicoot busily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Siamese cat gently. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," analyzed Miss Bandicoot cheerfully, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the wine rack on her front porch, looking out over the trail and trembling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Siamese cat. Do come again."

"Just a minute," snarled Mrs. Siamese cat primly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Bandicoot thought she had answered, and was beginning to get peculiar. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Siamese cat doing these days?"

Mrs. Siamese cat would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Bandicoot sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied proudly.