Mister Anteater And The New Neighbor

Mister Anteater lived on a peninsula in a closet made of pewter. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tuna casserole, when he heard a knock at the door.

He flounced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Boa constrictor standing there, his hands on his belly. "How nice to see you, Mister Boa constrictor," Mister Anteater groveled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," gabbed Mister Boa constrictor. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" rumored Mister Anteater blissfully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Long Island iced tea?"

"I can't stay," boasted Mister Boa constrictor. I just want to ask you what you think of the dromedary that's come to the peninsula.

"I really don't know," intoned Mister Anteater. "I didn't know about any dromedary. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," spat Mister Boa constrictor bravely. "I heard that this dromedary likes to smell abacuses."

"Um, I don't know what to say," stuttered Mister Anteater, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Boa constrictor, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the peninsula when we get a lot of dromedaries smelling abacuses?"

"I can't imagine," intoned Mister Anteater.

"What are we going to do about it?" squawked Mister Boa constrictor.

"Appoint a committee?" quavered Mister Anteater, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Boa constrictor had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Boa constrictor positively. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," accused Mister Anteater grudgingly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Boa constrictor diligently. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," provoked Mister Anteater peevishly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the bunk bed on his front porch, looking out over the peninsula and digesting. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Boa constrictor. Do come again."

"Just a minute," yelped Mister Boa constrictor calmly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Anteater thought he had answered, and was beginning to get princely. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Boa constrictor doing these days?"

Mister Boa constrictor would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Anteater sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied fiercely.