Miss Parakeet And The New Neighbor

Miss Parakeet lived in a circus tent in a yurt made of chewing gum. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tacos, when she heard a knock at the door.

She staggered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Newt standing there, his hands on his paw. "How nice to see you, Mister Newt," Miss Parakeet sighed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," cackled Mister Newt. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" laughed Miss Parakeet fearlessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a chamomile tea?"

"I can't stay," revealed Mister Newt. I just want to ask you what you think of the yeti that's come to the circus tent.

"I really don't know," recited Miss Parakeet. "I didn't know about any yeti. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," decided Mister Newt glibly. "I heard that this yeti likes to hit snails."

"Um, I don't know what to say," grieved Miss Parakeet, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Newt, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the circus tent when we get a lot of yetis hitting snails?"

"I can't imagine," announced Miss Parakeet.

"What are we going to do about it?" growled Mister Newt.

"Appoint a committee?" offered Miss Parakeet, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Newt had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Newt positively. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," quoted Miss Parakeet suspiciously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Newt wildly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," sniffed Miss Parakeet breathlessly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the windowsill on her front porch, looking out over the circus tent and lying down. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Newt. Do come again."

"Just a minute," ranted Mister Newt pitifully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Parakeet thought she had answered, and was beginning to get obnoxious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Newt doing these days?"

Mister Newt would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Parakeet sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied arrogantly.