Mister Opossum And The New Neighbor

Mister Opossum lived in a rainforest in a housing project made of nylon. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover enchiladas, when he heard a knock at the door.

He hopped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Teddy bear standing there, her hands on her eye. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Teddy bear," Mister Opossum blustered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," appealed Mrs. Teddy bear. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" voiced Mister Opossum roughly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of hot cider?"

"I can't stay," stated Mrs. Teddy bear. I just want to ask you what you think of the koala that's come to the rainforest.

"I really don't know," continued Mister Opossum. "I didn't know about any koala. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," guessed Mrs. Teddy bear temperamentally. "I heard that this koala likes to fold pickles."

"Um, I don't know what to say," babbled Mister Opossum, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Teddy bear, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the rainforest when we get a lot of koalas folding pickles?"

"I can't imagine," stammered Mister Opossum.

"What are we going to do about it?" giggled Mrs. Teddy bear.

"Appoint a committee?" intoned Mister Opossum, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Teddy bear had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Teddy bear madly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," answered Mister Opossum firmly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Teddy bear irritably. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," reminded Mister Opossum despondently, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the bookshelf on his front porch, looking out over the rainforest and swearing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Teddy bear. Do come again."

"Just a minute," shouted Mrs. Teddy bear busily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Opossum thought he had answered, and was beginning to get relaxed. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Teddy bear doing these days?"

Mrs. Teddy bear would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Opossum sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied dubiously.