Miss Oyster And The New Neighbor

Miss Oyster lived in a hayfield in a cottage made of buffalo hides. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover jambalaya, when she heard a knock at the door.

She bounced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Boar standing there, her hands on her paw. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Boar," Miss Oyster analyzed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," contended Mrs. Boar. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" reasoned Miss Oyster wildly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of grape juice?"

"I can't stay," amended Mrs. Boar. I just want to ask you what you think of the rooster that's come to the hayfield.

"I really don't know," announced Miss Oyster. "I didn't know about any rooster. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," imitated Mrs. Boar coldly. "I heard that this rooster likes to extinguish chairs."

"Um, I don't know what to say," mused Miss Oyster, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Boar, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the hayfield when we get a lot of roosters extinguishing chairs?"

"I can't imagine," giggled Miss Oyster.

"What are we going to do about it?" griped Mrs. Boar.

"Appoint a committee?" alleged Miss Oyster, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Boar had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Boar vacantly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," rationalized Miss Oyster silently, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Boar repeatedly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," comforted Miss Oyster cautiously, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the pedestal on her front porch, looking out over the hayfield and freaking out. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Boar. Do come again."

"Just a minute," added Mrs. Boar clumsily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Oyster thought she had answered, and was beginning to get princely. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Boar doing these days?"

Mrs. Boar would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Oyster sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied gingerly.