Mister Chipmunk And The New Neighbor

Mister Chipmunk lived on a prairie in a log cabin made of Tyvek. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover burritos, when he heard a knock at the door.

He marched to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Tiger standing there, his hands on his skin. "How nice to see you, Mister Tiger," Mister Chipmunk articulated, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," offered Mister Tiger. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" whined Mister Chipmunk strictly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a fruit smoothie?"

"I can't stay," rebutted Mister Tiger. I just want to ask you what you think of the turtle that's come to the prairie.

"I really don't know," complained Mister Chipmunk. "I didn't know about any turtle. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," opined Mister Tiger elatedly. "I heard that this turtle likes to taste amulets."

"Um, I don't know what to say," howled Mister Chipmunk, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Tiger, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the prairie when we get a lot of turtles tasting amulets?"

"I can't imagine," muttered Mister Chipmunk.

"What are we going to do about it?" noted Mister Tiger.

"Appoint a committee?" snarled Mister Chipmunk, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Tiger had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Tiger defiantly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," simpered Mister Chipmunk hungrily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Tiger gingerly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," expressed Mister Chipmunk carefully, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the credenza on his front porch, looking out over the prairie and taking a bath. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Tiger. Do come again."

"Just a minute," reminded Mister Tiger miserably. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Chipmunk thought he had answered, and was beginning to get deadly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Tiger doing these days?"

Mister Tiger would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Chipmunk sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied gingerly.