Miss Unicorn And The New Neighbor

Miss Unicorn lived in a dumpster in a resort made of sweat and toil. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover cotton candy, when she heard a knock at the door.

She slithered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Colt standing there, her hands on her pinky. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Colt," Miss Unicorn winked, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," thought Mrs. Colt. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" asked Miss Unicorn softly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of fruit punch?"

"I can't stay," chanted Mrs. Colt. I just want to ask you what you think of the fish that's come to the dumpster.

"I really don't know," voiced Miss Unicorn. "I didn't know about any fish. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," sighed Mrs. Colt awkwardly. "I heard that this fish likes to check helmets."

"Um, I don't know what to say," affirmed Miss Unicorn, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Colt, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the dumpster when we get a lot of fish checking helmets?"

"I can't imagine," whined Miss Unicorn.

"What are we going to do about it?" chuckled Mrs. Colt.

"Appoint a committee?" winked Miss Unicorn, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Colt had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Colt brashly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," guessed Miss Unicorn repeatedly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Colt caustically. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," disputed Miss Unicorn zestily, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the catbird seat on her front porch, looking out over the dumpster and fidgeting. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Colt. Do come again."

"Just a minute," yelled Mrs. Colt boisterously. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Unicorn thought she had answered, and was beginning to get evil. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Colt doing these days?"

Mrs. Colt would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Unicorn sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied madly.