Miss Shrew And The New Neighbor

Miss Shrew lived on a butte in an apartment made of cellophane. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover pretzels, when she heard a knock at the door.

She inched to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Jackal standing there, her hands on her elbow. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Jackal," Miss Shrew analyzed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," grunted Mrs. Jackal. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" phrased Miss Shrew accidentally, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a rum and Coke?"

"I can't stay," groaned Mrs. Jackal. I just want to ask you what you think of the horse that's come to the butte.

"I really don't know," admitted Miss Shrew. "I didn't know about any horse. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," clarified Mrs. Jackal awkwardly. "I heard that this horse likes to gold plate doilies."

"Um, I don't know what to say," responded Miss Shrew, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Jackal, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the butte when we get a lot of horses gold plating doilies?"

"I can't imagine," giggled Miss Shrew.

"What are we going to do about it?" stormed Mrs. Jackal.

"Appoint a committee?" blurted Miss Shrew, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Jackal had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Jackal boldly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," insisted Miss Shrew tensely, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Jackal immediately. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," drawled Miss Shrew oddly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the settee on her front porch, looking out over the butte and frowning. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Jackal. Do come again."

"Just a minute," piped up Mrs. Jackal hysterically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Shrew thought she had answered, and was beginning to get merry. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Jackal doing these days?"

Mrs. Jackal would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Shrew sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied tensely.