Mister Snipe And The New Neighbor

Mister Snipe lived in a desert in a treehouse made of graham crackers. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lime sherbet, when he heard a knock at the door.

He sidled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Hog standing there, his hands on his belly button. "How nice to see you, Mister Hog," Mister Snipe whispered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," chattered Mister Hog. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" smiled Mister Snipe solemnly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Mai Tai?"

"I can't stay," emphasized Mister Hog. I just want to ask you what you think of the hedgehog that's come to the desert.

"I really don't know," snarled Mister Snipe. "I didn't know about any hedgehog. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," mumbled Mister Hog properly. "I heard that this hedgehog likes to grab paper clips."

"Um, I don't know what to say," revealed Mister Snipe, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Hog, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the desert when we get a lot of hedgehogs grabbing paper clips?"

"I can't imagine," interpreted Mister Snipe.

"What are we going to do about it?" purred Mister Hog.

"Appoint a committee?" giggled Mister Snipe, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Hog had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Hog intensely. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," blathered Mister Snipe unexpectedly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Hog violently. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," chortled Mister Snipe lovingly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the umbrella stand on his front porch, looking out over the desert and barking. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Hog. Do come again."

"Just a minute," stated Mister Hog blissfully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Snipe thought he had answered, and was beginning to get furious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Hog doing these days?"

Mister Hog would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Snipe sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied flightily.