Miss Chimpanzee And The New Neighbor

Miss Chimpanzee lived at an oasis in a Victorian mansion made of slime. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover wienerschnitzel, when she heard a knock at the door.

She straggled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Yeti standing there, her hands on her lung. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Yeti," Miss Chimpanzee groveled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," vowed Mrs. Yeti. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" articulated Miss Chimpanzee jokingly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of Kool-Aid?"

"I can't stay," vouched Mrs. Yeti. I just want to ask you what you think of the camel that's come to the oasis.

"I really don't know," articulated Miss Chimpanzee. "I didn't know about any camel. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," guessed Mrs. Yeti firmly. "I heard that this camel likes to clamp chamber pots."

"Um, I don't know what to say," avowed Miss Chimpanzee, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Yeti, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the oasis when we get a lot of camels clamping chamber pots?"

"I can't imagine," disputed Miss Chimpanzee.

"What are we going to do about it?" moaned Mrs. Yeti.

"Appoint a committee?" yelped Miss Chimpanzee, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Yeti had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Yeti nervously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," persisted Miss Chimpanzee firmly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Yeti glumly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," mentioned Miss Chimpanzee lazily, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the couch on her front porch, looking out over the oasis and quivering. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Yeti. Do come again."

"Just a minute," cajoled Mrs. Yeti arrogantly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Chimpanzee thought she had answered, and was beginning to get atrocious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Yeti doing these days?"

Mrs. Yeti would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Chimpanzee sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied deftly.