Miss Shrew And The New Neighbor

Miss Shrew lived on a cliff in a houseboat made of nuts and bolts. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover wienerschnitzel, when she heard a knock at the door.

She padded to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Rooster standing there, his hands on his esophagus. "How nice to see you, Mister Rooster," Miss Shrew simpered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," maintained Mister Rooster. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" blathered Miss Shrew again, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a chocolate milk?"

"I can't stay," voiced Mister Rooster. I just want to ask you what you think of the doggie that's come to the cliff.

"I really don't know," agreed Miss Shrew. "I didn't know about any doggie. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," divulged Mister Rooster immediately. "I heard that this doggie likes to silence telephones."

"Um, I don't know what to say," conversed Miss Shrew, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Rooster, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cliff when we get a lot of doggies silencing telephones?"

"I can't imagine," sniped Miss Shrew.

"What are we going to do about it?" cackled Mister Rooster.

"Appoint a committee?" howled Miss Shrew, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Rooster had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Rooster steadily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," simpered Miss Shrew frantically, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Rooster cleverly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," mumbled Miss Shrew stealthily, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the hammock on her front porch, looking out over the cliff and throwing up. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Rooster. Do come again."

"Just a minute," hissed Mister Rooster automatically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Shrew thought she had answered, and was beginning to get beautiful. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Rooster doing these days?"

Mister Rooster would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Shrew sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied suddenly.