Miss Dormouse And The New Neighbor

Miss Dormouse lived on a wasteland in a hovel made of concrete. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover chocolate-covered ants, when she heard a knock at the door.

She zipped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Shrew standing there, her hands on her lung. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Shrew," Miss Dormouse intoned, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," imitated Mrs. Shrew. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" vowed Miss Dormouse accidentally, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of bourbon?"

"I can't stay," screeched Mrs. Shrew. I just want to ask you what you think of the sasquatch that's come to the wasteland.

"I really don't know," stuttered Miss Dormouse. "I didn't know about any sasquatch. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," laughed Mrs. Shrew neatly. "I heard that this sasquatch likes to box remote controls."

"Um, I don't know what to say," tittered Miss Dormouse, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Shrew, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the wasteland when we get a lot of sasquatches boxing remote controls?"

"I can't imagine," purred Miss Dormouse.

"What are we going to do about it?" mumbled Mrs. Shrew.

"Appoint a committee?" answered Miss Dormouse, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Shrew had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Shrew impatiently. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," queried Miss Dormouse surreptitiously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Shrew unexpectedly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," chattered Miss Dormouse flightily, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the wardrobe on her front porch, looking out over the wasteland and growing up. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Shrew. Do come again."

"Just a minute," queried Mrs. Shrew dolorously. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Dormouse thought she had answered, and was beginning to get enchanting. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Shrew doing these days?"

Mrs. Shrew would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Dormouse sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied sorrowfully.