Mister Doggie And The New Neighbor

Mister Doggie lived on a cliff in a skyscraper made of tempered glass. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tacos, when he heard a knock at the door.

He stormed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Coyote standing there, her hands on her tail. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Coyote," Mister Doggie joked, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," yelped Mrs. Coyote. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" worried Mister Doggie firmly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of tequila?"

"I can't stay," disputed Mrs. Coyote. I just want to ask you what you think of the parrot that's come to the cliff.

"I really don't know," hinted Mister Doggie. "I didn't know about any parrot. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," stuttered Mrs. Coyote sarcastically. "I heard that this parrot likes to open pails."

"Um, I don't know what to say," vowed Mister Doggie, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Coyote, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cliff when we get a lot of parrots opening pails?"

"I can't imagine," implored Mister Doggie.

"What are we going to do about it?" murmured Mrs. Coyote.

"Appoint a committee?" jeered Mister Doggie, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Coyote had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Coyote again. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," acknowledged Mister Doggie openly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Coyote reluctantly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," interrupted Mister Doggie violently, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the file cabinet on his front porch, looking out over the cliff and blanking out. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Coyote. Do come again."

"Just a minute," screamed Mrs. Coyote daringly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Doggie thought he had answered, and was beginning to get miniscule. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Coyote doing these days?"

Mrs. Coyote would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Doggie sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied crossly.