Miss Iguana And The New Neighbor

Miss Iguana lived in a glen in a duplex made of peat moss. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover oatmeal, when she heard a knock at the door.

She ambled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Eel standing there, her hands on her skull. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Eel," Miss Iguana moaned, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," agreed Mrs. Eel. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" began Miss Iguana gently, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a tonic?"

"I can't stay," scoffed Mrs. Eel. I just want to ask you what you think of the zebra that's come to the glen.

"I really don't know," maintained Miss Iguana. "I didn't know about any zebra. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," winked Mrs. Eel daintily. "I heard that this zebra likes to hide clams."

"Um, I don't know what to say," peeped Miss Iguana, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Eel, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the glen when we get a lot of zebras hiding clams?"

"I can't imagine," hinted Miss Iguana.

"What are we going to do about it?" appealed Mrs. Eel.

"Appoint a committee?" spouted Miss Iguana, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Eel had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Eel gratefully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," harangued Miss Iguana flightily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Eel roughly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," affirmed Miss Iguana intensely, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the credenza on her front porch, looking out over the glen and glaring. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Eel. Do come again."

"Just a minute," piped up Mrs. Eel fearlessly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Iguana thought she had answered, and was beginning to get tactful. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Eel doing these days?"

Mrs. Eel would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Iguana sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied courteously.