Miss Opossum And The New Neighbor

Miss Opossum lived on a mountainside in a cave made of cards. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover catfish stew, when she heard a knock at the door.

She reeled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Polar bear standing there, his hands on his kidney. "How nice to see you, Mister Polar bear," Miss Opossum trumpeted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," groveled Mister Polar bear. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" protested Miss Opossum thoughtfully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Mojito?"

"I can't stay," joked Mister Polar bear. I just want to ask you what you think of the dinosaur that's come to the mountainside.

"I really don't know," howled Miss Opossum. "I didn't know about any dinosaur. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," nattered Mister Polar bear wildly. "I heard that this dinosaur likes to grapple corks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," inquired Miss Opossum, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Polar bear, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the mountainside when we get a lot of dinosaurs grappling corks?"

"I can't imagine," spouted Miss Opossum.

"What are we going to do about it?" maintained Mister Polar bear.

"Appoint a committee?" growled Miss Opossum, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Polar bear had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Polar bear pitifully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," burbled Miss Opossum frenetically, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Polar bear perkily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," whined Miss Opossum softly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the washing machine on her front porch, looking out over the mountainside and fantasizing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Polar bear. Do come again."

"Just a minute," alleged Mister Polar bear blissfully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Opossum thought she had answered, and was beginning to get tired. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Polar bear doing these days?"

Mister Polar bear would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Opossum sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied grudgingly.