Miss Mongoose And The New Neighbor

Miss Mongoose lived on a veld in a Victorian mansion made of pewter. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover crumb cake, when she heard a knock at the door.

She ran to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Dog standing there, his hands on his throat. "How nice to see you, Mister Dog," Miss Mongoose asserted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," barked Mister Dog. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" interpreted Miss Mongoose resignedly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of bourbon?"

"I can't stay," guessed Mister Dog. I just want to ask you what you think of the chicken that's come to the veld.

"I really don't know," begged Miss Mongoose. "I didn't know about any chicken. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," howled Mister Dog busily. "I heard that this chicken likes to squash pairs of fuzzy dice."

"Um, I don't know what to say," inquired Miss Mongoose, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Dog, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the veld when we get a lot of chickens squashing pairs of fuzzy dice?"

"I can't imagine," lamented Miss Mongoose.

"What are we going to do about it?" giggled Mister Dog.

"Appoint a committee?" burbled Miss Mongoose, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Dog had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Dog angrily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," grunted Miss Mongoose proudly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Dog narrowly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," mentioned Miss Mongoose lickety-split, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the counter on her front porch, looking out over the veld and rocking. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Dog. Do come again."

"Just a minute," rumored Mister Dog glibly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Mongoose thought she had answered, and was beginning to get desperate. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Dog doing these days?"

Mister Dog would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Mongoose sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied sympathetically.