Miss Goose And The New Neighbor

Miss Goose lived in a landfill in a travel trailer made of asphalt. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover ravioli, when she heard a knock at the door.

She sauntered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Opossum standing there, his hands on his hip. "How nice to see you, Mister Opossum," Miss Goose accused, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," wailed Mister Opossum. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" stammered Miss Goose unnaturally, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Sangría?"

"I can't stay," analyzed Mister Opossum. I just want to ask you what you think of the gecko that's come to the landfill.

"I really don't know," explained Miss Goose. "I didn't know about any gecko. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," reasoned Mister Opossum unnaturally. "I heard that this gecko likes to prepare dead chameleons."

"Um, I don't know what to say," jeered Miss Goose, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Opossum, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the landfill when we get a lot of geckos preparing dead chameleons?"

"I can't imagine," observed Miss Goose.

"What are we going to do about it?" crooned Mister Opossum.

"Appoint a committee?" tittered Miss Goose, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Opossum had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Opossum nervously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," declared Miss Goose boisterously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Opossum doubtfully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," yammered Miss Goose recklessly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the overstuffed chair on her front porch, looking out over the landfill and wobbling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Opossum. Do come again."

"Just a minute," acknowledged Mister Opossum fearfully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Goose thought she had answered, and was beginning to get direct. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Opossum doing these days?"

Mister Opossum would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Goose sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied warmly.