Mister Tiger And The New Neighbor

Mister Tiger lived in a cornfield in a teepee made of taffeta. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover fish and chips, when he heard a knock at the door.

He tumbled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Mole standing there, her hands on her jaw. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Mole," Mister Tiger whimpered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," pointed out Mrs. Mole. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" indicated Mister Tiger firmly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Mudslide?"

"I can't stay," realized Mrs. Mole. I just want to ask you what you think of the crab that's come to the cornfield.

"I really don't know," bawled Mister Tiger. "I didn't know about any crab. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," rationalized Mrs. Mole strictly. "I heard that this crab likes to experience handkerchiefs."

"Um, I don't know what to say," boomed Mister Tiger, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Mole, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cornfield when we get a lot of crabs experiencing handkerchiefs?"

"I can't imagine," agreed Mister Tiger.

"What are we going to do about it?" stammered Mrs. Mole.

"Appoint a committee?" complained Mister Tiger, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Mole had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Mole daringly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," howled Mister Tiger uselessly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Mole ruefully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," blubbered Mister Tiger bravely, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the credenza on his front porch, looking out over the cornfield and sniffling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Mole. Do come again."

"Just a minute," interpreted Mrs. Mole nonchalantly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Tiger thought he had answered, and was beginning to get cowardly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Mole doing these days?"

Mrs. Mole would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Tiger sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied elatedly.