Miss Swan And The New Neighbor

Miss Swan lived on a beach in a KOA Kampground made of cardboard. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover chicken pot pie, when she heard a knock at the door.

She slipped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Pelican standing there, her hands on her front tooth. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Pelican," Miss Swan whined, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," rebutted Mrs. Pelican. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" implored Miss Swan strictly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of whiskey?"

"I can't stay," hummed Mrs. Pelican. I just want to ask you what you think of the oyster that's come to the beach.

"I really don't know," preached Miss Swan. "I didn't know about any oyster. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," asked Mrs. Pelican timidly. "I heard that this oyster likes to hammer hockey pucks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," groaned Miss Swan, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Pelican, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the beach when we get a lot of oysters hammering hockey pucks?"

"I can't imagine," guessed Miss Swan.

"What are we going to do about it?" indicated Mrs. Pelican.

"Appoint a committee?" pronounced Miss Swan, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Pelican had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Pelican courteously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," uttered Miss Swan courteously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Pelican properly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," realized Miss Swan reluctantly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the cupboard on her front porch, looking out over the beach and cheering up. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Pelican. Do come again."

"Just a minute," screamed Mrs. Pelican fondly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Swan thought she had answered, and was beginning to get bad. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Pelican doing these days?"

Mrs. Pelican would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Swan sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied repeatedly.