Miss Mare And The New Neighbor

Miss Mare lived on a battlefield in a geodesic dome made of noodles. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover sauerkraut, when she heard a knock at the door.

She tumbled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Honeybee standing there, her hands on her hair. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Honeybee," Miss Mare pointed out, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," pleaded Mrs. Honeybee. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" spoke up Miss Mare strictly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of whiskey?"

"I can't stay," whined Mrs. Honeybee. I just want to ask you what you think of the doggie that's come to the battlefield.

"I really don't know," babbled Miss Mare. "I didn't know about any doggie. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," jeered Mrs. Honeybee frantically. "I heard that this doggie likes to wash bottles of perfume."

"Um, I don't know what to say," suggested Miss Mare, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Honeybee, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the battlefield when we get a lot of doggies washing bottles of perfume?"

"I can't imagine," expressed Miss Mare.

"What are we going to do about it?" whispered Mrs. Honeybee.

"Appoint a committee?" insisted Miss Mare, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Honeybee had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Honeybee vigorously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," whimpered Miss Mare breathlessly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Honeybee quickly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," screamed Miss Mare sheepishly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the four-poster bed on her front porch, looking out over the battlefield and coming along. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Honeybee. Do come again."

"Just a minute," railed Mrs. Honeybee sleepily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Mare thought she had answered, and was beginning to get statuesque. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Honeybee doing these days?"

Mrs. Honeybee would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Mare sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied nimbly.