Miss Zebra And The New Neighbor

Miss Zebra lived in a briar patch in a wikiup made of lath and plaster. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lime sherbet, when she heard a knock at the door.

She made a beeline to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Rhinoceros standing there, his hands on his little finger. "How nice to see you, Mister Rhinoceros," Miss Zebra yawned, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," spouted Mister Rhinoceros. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" clarified Miss Zebra frantically, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Bloody Mary?"

"I can't stay," spewed Mister Rhinoceros. I just want to ask you what you think of the parakeet that's come to the briar patch.

"I really don't know," noted Miss Zebra. "I didn't know about any parakeet. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," squeaked Mister Rhinoceros trustingly. "I heard that this parakeet likes to stack rolls of duct tape."

"Um, I don't know what to say," spoke up Miss Zebra, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Rhinoceros, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the briar patch when we get a lot of parakeets stacking rolls of duct tape?"

"I can't imagine," said Miss Zebra.

"What are we going to do about it?" commented Mister Rhinoceros.

"Appoint a committee?" stated Miss Zebra, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Rhinoceros had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Rhinoceros intensely. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," requested Miss Zebra timidly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Rhinoceros ferociously. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," wept Miss Zebra lickety-split, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the ottoman on her front porch, looking out over the briar patch and knitting. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Rhinoceros. Do come again."

"Just a minute," retorted Mister Rhinoceros valiantly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Zebra thought she had answered, and was beginning to get bellicose. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Rhinoceros doing these days?"

Mister Rhinoceros would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Zebra sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied tensely.