Miss Parakeet And The New Neighbor

Miss Parakeet lived on a peninsula in a sod house made of rubble. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lobster, when she heard a knock at the door.

She loped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Whale standing there, his hands on his throat. "How nice to see you, Mister Whale," Miss Parakeet expressed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," sighed Mister Whale. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" trumpeted Miss Parakeet peevishly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a 7-Up?"

"I can't stay," jeered Mister Whale. I just want to ask you what you think of the groundhog that's come to the peninsula.

"I really don't know," suggested Miss Parakeet. "I didn't know about any groundhog. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," nattered Mister Whale ignobly. "I heard that this groundhog likes to moisten Hostess Ding Dongs."

"Um, I don't know what to say," called Miss Parakeet, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Whale, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the peninsula when we get a lot of groundhogs moistening Hostess Ding Dongs?"

"I can't imagine," simpered Miss Parakeet.

"What are we going to do about it?" drawled Mister Whale.

"Appoint a committee?" questioned Miss Parakeet, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Whale had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Whale sadly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," appealed Miss Parakeet charmingly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Whale frenetically. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," warbled Miss Parakeet sheepishly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the cupboard on her front porch, looking out over the peninsula and squeaking. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Whale. Do come again."

"Just a minute," uttered Mister Whale furiously. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Parakeet thought she had answered, and was beginning to get direct. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Whale doing these days?"

Mister Whale would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Parakeet sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied doubtfully.