Mister Lizard And The New Neighbor

Mister Lizard lived alongside a stream in a mud hut made of plywood. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover roast turkey, when he heard a knock at the door.

He flew to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Brine shrimp standing there, her hands on her nostril. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Brine shrimp," Mister Lizard proposed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," answered Mrs. Brine shrimp. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" argued Mister Lizard suspiciously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a can of Ensure?"

"I can't stay," rumored Mrs. Brine shrimp. I just want to ask you what you think of the quail that's come to the stream.

"I really don't know," realized Mister Lizard. "I didn't know about any quail. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," remarked Mrs. Brine shrimp warmly. "I heard that this quail likes to grind oranges."

"Um, I don't know what to say," shuddered Mister Lizard, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Brine shrimp, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the stream when we get a lot of quails grinding oranges?"

"I can't imagine," yammered Mister Lizard.

"What are we going to do about it?" fumed Mrs. Brine shrimp.

"Appoint a committee?" muttered Mister Lizard, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Brine shrimp had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Brine shrimp sarcastically. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," stuttered Mister Lizard coldly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Brine shrimp positively. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," chanted Mister Lizard gleefully, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the water bed on his front porch, looking out over the stream and whistling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Brine shrimp. Do come again."

"Just a minute," pronounced Mrs. Brine shrimp steadily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Lizard thought he had answered, and was beginning to get sleepy. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Brine shrimp doing these days?"

Mrs. Brine shrimp would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Lizard sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied obediently.