Mister Porcupine And The New Neighbor

Mister Porcupine lived in a dumpster in a church made of cotton. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lamb curry, when he heard a knock at the door.

He hopped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Meerkat standing there, his hands on his paw. "How nice to see you, Mister Meerkat," Mister Porcupine quavered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," sniveled Mister Meerkat. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" growled Mister Porcupine resignedly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a chocolate milk?"

"I can't stay," giggled Mister Meerkat. I just want to ask you what you think of the gorilla that's come to the dumpster.

"I really don't know," provoked Mister Porcupine. "I didn't know about any gorilla. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," shuddered Mister Meerkat lightly. "I heard that this gorilla likes to curl telephone books."

"Um, I don't know what to say," swore Mister Porcupine, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Meerkat, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the dumpster when we get a lot of gorillas curling telephone books?"

"I can't imagine," analyzed Mister Porcupine.

"What are we going to do about it?" shouted Mister Meerkat.

"Appoint a committee?" jeered Mister Porcupine, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Meerkat had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Meerkat unabashedly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," voiced Mister Porcupine sarcastically, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Meerkat proudly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," conversed Mister Porcupine ferociously, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the hamper on his front porch, looking out over the dumpster and staring into space. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Meerkat. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chortled Mister Meerkat energetically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Porcupine thought he had answered, and was beginning to get rapacious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Meerkat doing these days?"

Mister Meerkat would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Porcupine sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied shakily.