Miss Ostrich And The New Neighbor

Miss Ostrich lived on a cliff in a flat made of sewage. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover pot roast, when she heard a knock at the door.

She reeled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Dormouse standing there, his hands on his nostril. "How nice to see you, Mister Dormouse," Miss Ostrich moaned, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," stated Mister Dormouse. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" persisted Miss Ostrich fearfully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of coffee?"

"I can't stay," reminded Mister Dormouse. I just want to ask you what you think of the musk-ox that's come to the cliff.

"I really don't know," peeped Miss Ostrich. "I didn't know about any musk-ox. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," proposed Mister Dormouse pitifully. "I heard that this musk-ox likes to package vacuum cleaners."

"Um, I don't know what to say," raved Miss Ostrich, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Dormouse, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cliff when we get a lot of musk-oxen packaging vacuum cleaners?"

"I can't imagine," raved Miss Ostrich.

"What are we going to do about it?" gasped Mister Dormouse.

"Appoint a committee?" preached Miss Ostrich, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Dormouse had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Dormouse hastily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," growled Miss Ostrich patiently, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Dormouse sadly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," fretted Miss Ostrich cautiously, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the bar stool on her front porch, looking out over the cliff and swallowing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Dormouse. Do come again."

"Just a minute," warbled Mister Dormouse cheerfully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Ostrich thought she had answered, and was beginning to get contented. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Dormouse doing these days?"

Mister Dormouse would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Ostrich sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied tenderly.