Miss Finch And The New Neighbor

Miss Finch lived on an island in a nunnery made of jewels. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lamb curry, when she heard a knock at the door.

She crawled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Hog standing there, his hands on his thorax. "How nice to see you, Mister Hog," Miss Finch proposed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," belched Mister Hog. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" vowed Miss Finch fiercely, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a soda?"

"I can't stay," orated Mister Hog. I just want to ask you what you think of the kangaroo that's come to the island.

"I really don't know," smirked Miss Finch. "I didn't know about any kangaroo. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," explained Mister Hog glumly. "I heard that this kangaroo likes to re-evaluate accordions."

"Um, I don't know what to say," wondered Miss Finch, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Hog, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the island when we get a lot of kangaroos re-evaluating accordions?"

"I can't imagine," wept Miss Finch.

"What are we going to do about it?" yelled Mister Hog.

"Appoint a committee?" pronounced Miss Finch, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Hog had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Hog clumsily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," roared Miss Finch shakily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Hog openly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," decided Miss Finch viciously, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the dresser on her front porch, looking out over the island and ruminating. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Hog. Do come again."

"Just a minute," mentioned Mister Hog nicely. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Finch thought she had answered, and was beginning to get conscientious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Hog doing these days?"

Mister Hog would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Finch sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied busily.