Miss Kangaroo And The New Neighbor

Miss Kangaroo lived in an arroyo in a parsonage made of old bottles. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover ceviche, when she heard a knock at the door.

She scampered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Muskrat standing there, his hands on his claw. "How nice to see you, Mister Muskrat," Miss Kangaroo grieved, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," cackled Mister Muskrat. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" protested Miss Kangaroo testily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you an Alka-Seltzer?"

"I can't stay," belched Mister Muskrat. I just want to ask you what you think of the ostrich that's come to the arroyo.

"I really don't know," sobbed Miss Kangaroo. "I didn't know about any ostrich. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," realized Mister Muskrat ignobly. "I heard that this ostrich likes to unwrap padlocks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," blurted Miss Kangaroo, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Muskrat, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the arroyo when we get a lot of ostriches unwrapping padlocks?"

"I can't imagine," screeched Miss Kangaroo.

"What are we going to do about it?" smirked Mister Muskrat.

"Appoint a committee?" realized Miss Kangaroo, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Muskrat had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Muskrat ruefully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," yelped Miss Kangaroo temperamentally, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Muskrat hungrily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," articulated Miss Kangaroo courageously, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the card table on her front porch, looking out over the arroyo and lounging. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Muskrat. Do come again."

"Just a minute," giggled Mister Muskrat vigorously. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Kangaroo thought she had answered, and was beginning to get big. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Muskrat doing these days?"

Mister Muskrat would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Kangaroo sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied smoothly.