Miss Elephant And The New Neighbor

Miss Elephant lived in a cornfield in a motor home made of cinder block. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover sweet potatoes, when she heard a knock at the door.

She cantered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Dragon standing there, her hands on her eyelash. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Dragon," Miss Elephant hollered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," sobbed Mrs. Dragon. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" breathed Miss Elephant quietly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a piña colada?"

"I can't stay," maintained Mrs. Dragon. I just want to ask you what you think of the aardvark that's come to the cornfield.

"I really don't know," phrased Miss Elephant. "I didn't know about any aardvark. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," urged Mrs. Dragon quietly. "I heard that this aardvark likes to soak spoons."

"Um, I don't know what to say," muttered Miss Elephant, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Dragon, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cornfield when we get a lot of aardvarks soaking spoons?"

"I can't imagine," observed Miss Elephant.

"What are we going to do about it?" announced Mrs. Dragon.

"Appoint a committee?" shouted Miss Elephant, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Dragon had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Dragon vigorously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," scoffed Miss Elephant elatedly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Dragon hopelessly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," chanted Miss Elephant calmly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the ping-pong table on her front porch, looking out over the cornfield and wailing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Dragon. Do come again."

"Just a minute," spoke up Mrs. Dragon delicately. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Elephant thought she had answered, and was beginning to get selfish. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Dragon doing these days?"

Mrs. Dragon would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Elephant sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied dubiously.