Mister Dalmatian And The New Neighbor

Mister Dalmatian lived at an oasis in a monastery made of polystyrene. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover moo goo gai pan, when he heard a knock at the door.

He reeled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Airedale standing there, her hands on her adrenal gland. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Airedale," Mister Dalmatian realized, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," whispered Mrs. Airedale. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" decided Mister Dalmatian woefully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a hot buttered rum?"

"I can't stay," tittered Mrs. Airedale. I just want to ask you what you think of the bullfrog that's come to the oasis.

"I really don't know," clarified Mister Dalmatian. "I didn't know about any bullfrog. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," snarled Mrs. Airedale blankly. "I heard that this bullfrog likes to grasp oranges."

"Um, I don't know what to say," groaned Mister Dalmatian, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Airedale, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the oasis when we get a lot of bullfrogs grasping oranges?"

"I can't imagine," offered Mister Dalmatian.

"What are we going to do about it?" thought Mrs. Airedale.

"Appoint a committee?" tittered Mister Dalmatian, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Airedale had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Airedale admiringly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," commented Mister Dalmatian intensely, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Airedale wryly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," sniveled Mister Dalmatian temperamentally, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the cupboard on his front porch, looking out over the oasis and puffing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Airedale. Do come again."

"Just a minute," reasoned Mrs. Airedale grandly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Dalmatian thought he had answered, and was beginning to get wary. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Airedale doing these days?"

Mrs. Airedale would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Dalmatian sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied again.