Mister Ring-tailed Lemur And The New Neighbor

Mister Ring-tailed lemur lived on a grassy knoll in a log cabin made of plastic. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lamb curry, when he heard a knock at the door.

He jogged to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Pekingese standing there, her hands on her chest. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Pekingese," Mister Ring-tailed lemur agreed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," insisted Mrs. Pekingese. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" fantasized Mister Ring-tailed lemur zestily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a sassafras tea?"

"I can't stay," announced Mrs. Pekingese. I just want to ask you what you think of the pheasant that's come to the grassy knoll.

"I really don't know," mentioned Mister Ring-tailed lemur. "I didn't know about any pheasant. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," raved Mrs. Pekingese slyly. "I heard that this pheasant likes to manage hip flasks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," stormed Mister Ring-tailed lemur, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Pekingese, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the grassy knoll when we get a lot of pheasants managing hip flasks?"

"I can't imagine," began Mister Ring-tailed lemur.

"What are we going to do about it?" yawned Mrs. Pekingese.

"Appoint a committee?" warbled Mister Ring-tailed lemur, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Pekingese had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Pekingese greedily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," disputed Mister Ring-tailed lemur oddly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Pekingese cruelly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," articulated Mister Ring-tailed lemur quickly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the nightstand on his front porch, looking out over the grassy knoll and belching. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Pekingese. Do come again."

"Just a minute," hissed Mrs. Pekingese flightily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Ring-tailed lemur thought he had answered, and was beginning to get obnoxious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Pekingese doing these days?"

Mrs. Pekingese would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Ring-tailed lemur sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied calmly.