Miss Toad And The New Neighbor

Miss Toad lived on a prairie in a ranch house made of taffeta. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tofu, when she heard a knock at the door.

She stalked to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Cockatiel standing there, her hands on her vein. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Cockatiel," Miss Toad added, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," muttered Mrs. Cockatiel. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" reasoned Miss Toad dreamily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of KoolAid?"

"I can't stay," thought Mrs. Cockatiel. I just want to ask you what you think of the wolf that's come to the prairie.

"I really don't know," jeered Miss Toad. "I didn't know about any wolf. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," informed Mrs. Cockatiel smoothly. "I heard that this wolf likes to shellac corks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," raved Miss Toad, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Cockatiel, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the prairie when we get a lot of wolves shellacking corks?"

"I can't imagine," phrased Miss Toad.

"What are we going to do about it?" commented Mrs. Cockatiel.

"Appoint a committee?" nattered Miss Toad, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Cockatiel had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Cockatiel slyly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," insisted Miss Toad sympathetically, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Cockatiel strangely. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," fretted Miss Toad blindly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the bookcase on her front porch, looking out over the prairie and jerking. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Cockatiel. Do come again."

"Just a minute," sniveled Mrs. Cockatiel timidly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Toad thought she had answered, and was beginning to get passionate. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Cockatiel doing these days?"

Mrs. Cockatiel would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Toad sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied grudgingly.