Mister Canary And The New Neighbor

Mister Canary lived on a battlefield in a cottage made of aluminum foil. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover spaghetti, when he heard a knock at the door.

He tiptoed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Mare standing there, his hands on his knee. "How nice to see you, Mister Mare," Mister Canary announced, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," quavered Mister Mare. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" boomed Mister Canary coolly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a milkshake?"

"I can't stay," called Mister Mare. I just want to ask you what you think of the prairie dog that's come to the battlefield.

"I really don't know," fretted Mister Canary. "I didn't know about any prairie dog. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," snorted Mister Mare fearfully. "I heard that this prairie dog likes to prune ashtrays."

"Um, I don't know what to say," articulated Mister Canary, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Mare, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the battlefield when we get a lot of prairie dogs pruning ashtrays?"

"I can't imagine," boasted Mister Canary.

"What are we going to do about it?" rambled Mister Mare.

"Appoint a committee?" breathed Mister Canary, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Mare had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Mare roughly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," debated Mister Canary cautiously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Mare primly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," sniped Mister Canary ferociously, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the armoire on his front porch, looking out over the battlefield and nodding off. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Mare. Do come again."

"Just a minute," imitated Mister Mare vigorously. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Canary thought he had answered, and was beginning to get shy. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Mare doing these days?"

Mister Mare would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Canary sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied sleepily.