Mister Yeti And The New Neighbor

Mister Yeti lived on a mountaintop in a mud hut made of tempered steel. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover borscht, when he heard a knock at the door.

He climbed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Unicorn standing there, his hands on his stomach. "How nice to see you, Mister Unicorn," Mister Yeti rambled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," mouthed Mister Unicorn. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" warbled Mister Yeti boisterously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a gimlet?"

"I can't stay," cried Mister Unicorn. I just want to ask you what you think of the swan that's come to the mountaintop.

"I really don't know," asserted Mister Yeti. "I didn't know about any swan. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," yawned Mister Unicorn quickly. "I heard that this swan likes to copy coconuts."

"Um, I don't know what to say," sniffed Mister Yeti, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Unicorn, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the mountaintop when we get a lot of swans copying coconuts?"

"I can't imagine," blubbered Mister Yeti.

"What are we going to do about it?" articulated Mister Unicorn.

"Appoint a committee?" purred Mister Yeti, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Unicorn had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Unicorn jokingly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," yelled Mister Yeti courageously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Unicorn blankly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," moaned Mister Yeti bitterly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the four-poster bed on his front porch, looking out over the mountaintop and snoring. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Unicorn. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chimed Mister Unicorn awkwardly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Yeti thought he had answered, and was beginning to get obnoxious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Unicorn doing these days?"

Mister Unicorn would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Yeti sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied uselessly.