Miss Siamese Cat And The New Neighbor

Miss Siamese cat lived on a grassy knoll in a subway tunnel made of construction paper. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover doughnuts, when she heard a knock at the door.

She made a beeline to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Opossum standing there, his hands on his pituitary gland. "How nice to see you, Mister Opossum," Miss Siamese cat purred, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," brought up Mister Opossum. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" accused Miss Siamese cat caustically, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of wine?"

"I can't stay," yammered Mister Opossum. I just want to ask you what you think of the tiger that's come to the grassy knoll.

"I really don't know," wept Miss Siamese cat. "I didn't know about any tiger. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," moaned Mister Opossum repeatedly. "I heard that this tiger likes to forget pizzas."

"Um, I don't know what to say," emphasized Miss Siamese cat, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Opossum, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the grassy knoll when we get a lot of tigers forgetting pizzas?"

"I can't imagine," asked Miss Siamese cat.

"What are we going to do about it?" expressed Mister Opossum.

"Appoint a committee?" squawked Miss Siamese cat, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Opossum had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Opossum wearily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," phrased Miss Siamese cat zestily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Opossum glibly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," admitted Miss Siamese cat swiftly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the crib on her front porch, looking out over the grassy knoll and puffing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Opossum. Do come again."

"Just a minute," boomed Mister Opossum valiantly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Siamese cat thought she had answered, and was beginning to get sophisticated. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Opossum doing these days?"

Mister Opossum would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Siamese cat sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied slyly.