Miss Cockroach And The New Neighbor

Miss Cockroach lived in a hayfield in a geodesic dome made of chicken wire. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tortillas, when she heard a knock at the door.

She sped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Mare standing there, his hands on his toupee. "How nice to see you, Mister Mare," Miss Cockroach began, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," stormed Mister Mare. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" giggled Miss Cockroach daintily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of KoolAid?"

"I can't stay," bellowed Mister Mare. I just want to ask you what you think of the manatee that's come to the hayfield.

"I really don't know," mentioned Miss Cockroach. "I didn't know about any manatee. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," breathed Mister Mare violently. "I heard that this manatee likes to compress yo-yos."

"Um, I don't know what to say," said Miss Cockroach, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Mare, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the hayfield when we get a lot of manatees compressing yo-yos?"

"I can't imagine," whispered Miss Cockroach.

"What are we going to do about it?" admitted Mister Mare.

"Appoint a committee?" snorted Miss Cockroach, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Mare had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Mare thoughtfully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," interpreted Miss Cockroach smoothly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Mare roughly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," boasted Miss Cockroach tenderly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the fainting couch on her front porch, looking out over the hayfield and praying. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Mare. Do come again."

"Just a minute," mumbled Mister Mare speedily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Cockroach thought she had answered, and was beginning to get queer. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Mare doing these days?"

Mister Mare would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Cockroach sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied zestily.