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Miss Gorilla And The New Neighbor

Gorilla

Miss Gorilla lived on a battlefield in a villa made of peanut shells. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lime sherbet, when she heard a knock at the door.

She loped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

Kitten

She was surprised to see Mrs. Kitten standing there, her hands on her calf. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Kitten," Miss Gorilla spoke up, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," uttered Mrs. Kitten. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" guessed Miss Gorilla later, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of Kool-Aid?"

"I can't stay," boasted Mrs. Kitten. I just want to ask you what you think of the groundhog that's come to the battlefield.

groundhog

"I really don't know," responded Miss Gorilla. "I didn't know about any groundhog. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," contended Mrs. Kitten crazily. "I heard that this groundhog likes to lick abacuses."

"Um, I don't know what to say," voiced Miss Gorilla, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Kitten, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the battlefield when we get a lot of groundhogs licking abacuses?"

"I can't imagine," interpreted Miss Gorilla.

"What are we going to do about it?" pronounced Mrs. Kitten.

"Appoint a committee?" shouted Miss Gorilla, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Kitten had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Kitten zestily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," implored Miss Gorilla firmly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Kitten daintily. "You always have such good ideas."

umbrella stand

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," chuckled Miss Gorilla fearfully, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the umbrella stand on her front porch, looking out over the battlefield and showing up. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Kitten. Do come again."

"Just a minute," explained Mrs. Kitten dubiously. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Gorilla thought she had answered, and was beginning to get fiendish. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Kitten doing these days?"

Mrs. Kitten would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Gorilla sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied kindly.