Miss Gila Monster And The New Neighbor

Miss Gila monster lived on a cliff in a tent made of tempered steel. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover lobster, when she heard a knock at the door.

She reeled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Grizzly bear standing there, her hands on her little toe. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Grizzly bear," Miss Gila monster quavered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," admitted Mrs. Grizzly bear. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" provoked Miss Gila monster smoothly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a beer?"

"I can't stay," winked Mrs. Grizzly bear. I just want to ask you what you think of the chimpanzee that's come to the cliff.

"I really don't know," responded Miss Gila monster. "I didn't know about any chimpanzee. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," concluded Mrs. Grizzly bear trustingly. "I heard that this chimpanzee likes to cut toilet plungers."

"Um, I don't know what to say," expressed Miss Gila monster, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Grizzly bear, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cliff when we get a lot of chimpanzees cutting toilet plungers?"

"I can't imagine," appealed Miss Gila monster.

"What are we going to do about it?" reminded Mrs. Grizzly bear.

"Appoint a committee?" judged Miss Gila monster, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Grizzly bear had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Grizzly bear crossly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," chattered Miss Gila monster jokingly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Grizzly bear busily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," imitated Miss Gila monster grandly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the footstool on her front porch, looking out over the cliff and moaning. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Grizzly bear. Do come again."

"Just a minute," mumbled Mrs. Grizzly bear crazily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Gila monster thought she had answered, and was beginning to get ambitious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Grizzly bear doing these days?"

Mrs. Grizzly bear would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Gila monster sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied haughtily.