Miss Ostrich And The New Neighbor

Miss Ostrich lived in a badlands area in a stinky shack made of oak. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover steak, when she heard a knock at the door.

She made a beeline to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Walrus standing there, his hands on his rib. "How nice to see you, Mister Walrus," Miss Ostrich whimpered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," offered Mister Walrus. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" phrased Miss Ostrich blindly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of Kool-Aid?"

"I can't stay," urged Mister Walrus. I just want to ask you what you think of the ant that's come to the badlands area.

"I really don't know," stated Miss Ostrich. "I didn't know about any ant. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," concluded Mister Walrus uselessly. "I heard that this ant likes to dust daisies."

"Um, I don't know what to say," bragged Miss Ostrich, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Walrus, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the badlands area when we get a lot of ants dusting daisies?"

"I can't imagine," revealed Miss Ostrich.

"What are we going to do about it?" began Mister Walrus.

"Appoint a committee?" spat Miss Ostrich, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Walrus had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Walrus gingerly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," squeaked Miss Ostrich sympathetically, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Walrus dubiously. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," stammered Miss Ostrich reluctantly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the computer on her front porch, looking out over the badlands area and staring into space. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Walrus. Do come again."

"Just a minute," spouted Mister Walrus effortlessly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Ostrich thought she had answered, and was beginning to get funny. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Walrus doing these days?"

Mister Walrus would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Ostrich sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied energetically.