Miss Louse And The New Neighbor

Miss Louse lived on a moonscape in a motor home made of Velcro. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover corn on the cob, when she heard a knock at the door.

She made a beeline to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Hyena standing there, his hands on his wig. "How nice to see you, Mister Hyena," Miss Louse chortled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," croaked Mister Hyena. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" blathered Miss Louse glumly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a secret potion?"

"I can't stay," stormed Mister Hyena. I just want to ask you what you think of the beetle that's come to the moonscape.

"I really don't know," divulged Miss Louse. "I didn't know about any beetle. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," chuckled Mister Hyena happily. "I heard that this beetle likes to dispose of Happy Meals."

"Um, I don't know what to say," comforted Miss Louse, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Hyena, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the moonscape when we get a lot of beetles disposing of Happy Meals?"

"I can't imagine," admitted Miss Louse.

"What are we going to do about it?" blathered Mister Hyena.

"Appoint a committee?" complained Miss Louse, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Hyena had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Hyena blankly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," grunted Miss Louse cheerfully, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Hyena daintily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," smirked Miss Louse frenetically, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the bookshelf on her front porch, looking out over the moonscape and throwing up. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Hyena. Do come again."

"Just a minute," sobbed Mister Hyena hopelessly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Louse thought she had answered, and was beginning to get cowardly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Hyena doing these days?"

Mister Hyena would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Louse sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied gently.