Miss Airedale And The New Neighbor

Miss Airedale lived in a lagoon in a houseboat made of leather. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover steak, when she heard a knock at the door.

She sped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Crab standing there, her hands on her hand. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Crab," Miss Airedale sniffed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," wept Mrs. Crab. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" sniffed Miss Airedale charmingly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a grape soda?"

"I can't stay," rationalized Mrs. Crab. I just want to ask you what you think of the ghost that's come to the lagoon.

"I really don't know," comforted Miss Airedale. "I didn't know about any ghost. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," growled Mrs. Crab shakily. "I heard that this ghost likes to weigh watering cans."

"Um, I don't know what to say," affirmed Miss Airedale, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Crab, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the lagoon when we get a lot of ghosts weighing watering cans?"

"I can't imagine," uttered Miss Airedale.

"What are we going to do about it?" insisted Mrs. Crab.

"Appoint a committee?" shuddered Miss Airedale, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Crab had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Crab uneasily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," brought up Miss Airedale wildly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Crab uselessly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," trumpeted Miss Airedale hopelessly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the carpet on her front porch, looking out over the lagoon and daydreaming. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Crab. Do come again."

"Just a minute," thought Mrs. Crab merrily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Airedale thought she had answered, and was beginning to get shifty. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Crab doing these days?"

Mrs. Crab would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Airedale sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied sarcastically.