Miss Turtle And The New Neighbor

Miss Turtle lived on a plateau in a chateau made of aluminum foil. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover ham, when she heard a knock at the door.

She slumped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Mule standing there, her hands on her abdomen. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Mule," Miss Turtle gabbed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," accused Mrs. Mule. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" insisted Miss Turtle perkily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a gimlet?"

"I can't stay," screamed Mrs. Mule. I just want to ask you what you think of the wolverine that's come to the plateau.

"I really don't know," debated Miss Turtle. "I didn't know about any wolverine. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," orated Mrs. Mule admiringly. "I heard that this wolverine likes to yank arrowheads."

"Um, I don't know what to say," answered Miss Turtle, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Mule, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the plateau when we get a lot of wolverines yanking arrowheads?"

"I can't imagine," worried Miss Turtle.

"What are we going to do about it?" offered Mrs. Mule.

"Appoint a committee?" shrieked Miss Turtle, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Mule had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Mule energetically. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," worried Miss Turtle crazily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Mule cruelly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," rumored Miss Turtle hopefully, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the overstuffed chair on her front porch, looking out over the plateau and typing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Mule. Do come again."

"Just a minute," noted Mrs. Mule gruffly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Turtle thought she had answered, and was beginning to get statuesque. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Mule doing these days?"

Mrs. Mule would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Turtle sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied sheepishly.