Miss Shrew And The New Neighbor

Miss Shrew lived in a marsh in a geodesic dome made of cornstalks. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover pecan pie, when she heard a knock at the door.

She climbed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Parakeet standing there, his hands on his brain. "How nice to see you, Mister Parakeet," Miss Shrew muttered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," observed Mister Parakeet. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" smiled Miss Shrew courageously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a margarita?"

"I can't stay," rebutted Mister Parakeet. I just want to ask you what you think of the lark that's come to the marsh.

"I really don't know," groaned Miss Shrew. "I didn't know about any lark. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," agreed Mister Parakeet wildly. "I heard that this lark likes to stab beach balls."

"Um, I don't know what to say," laughed Miss Shrew, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Parakeet, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the marsh when we get a lot of larks stabbing beach balls?"

"I can't imagine," squeaked Miss Shrew.

"What are we going to do about it?" reminded Mister Parakeet.

"Appoint a committee?" voiced Miss Shrew, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Parakeet had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Parakeet shakily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," fumed Miss Shrew greedily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Parakeet happily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," asserted Miss Shrew glibly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the credenza on her front porch, looking out over the marsh and twitching. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Parakeet. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chimed Mister Parakeet thankfully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Shrew thought she had answered, and was beginning to get poised. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Parakeet doing these days?"

Mister Parakeet would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Shrew sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied thoughtfully.