Rewrite this story

Kurt Rexford, Inventor

Kurt Rexford has touched so many lives, it is difficult to remember that he came from very humble roots. He was born in Phoenix, a greasy city in Venezuela. His mother was a brassy woman from Panama, and his father was a cardiologist in Phoenix.

billiard ball

They first lived in a teepee. They eked out their living making ham and homemade billiard balls in their doghouse and selling them out of their Trans Am.

After high school, Kurt went off to Tennessee College in Copenhagen, but had to drop out after only six years, due to his thoughtful personality.

Forced to make his own living, he first worked at a bank ruining pairs of scissors, but he didn't enjoy the work and could barely get by on three thousand five hundred eighty-three dollars a week.

screwdriver

As he worked at the bank, he began to think about how he could improve screwdrivers. No one had tried to make them out of wax before. Kurt decided to give it a try. The first screwdriver was much too green and he became discouraged, but he persevered, and eventually came up with a method of heating the screwdriver prior to use. The screwdrivers could now be sold without being green, and before long, the first two hundred screwdrivers were sold.

The next invention was to become known as the Rexford Purse, a synthetic product that became wildly popular in Zambia, but did not catch on in areas that get lots of thunderstorms.

Kurt's best known invention, of course, is chewing gum, one of the major accomplishments of the 19th Century, commonly said to be responsible for advancing civilization out of the Duct Tape Age. Every time you use chewing gum, you can thank Kurt.

Invention followed invention, and soon, the name Kurt Rexford was known as well as that of J├╝rgen Snitley himself. Kurt's creative streak took root, and the rest is history.