Meeting Sydney

He stared out the window overlooking the street. How long had it been since he had had a decent case, he thought crossly. If something didn't come along soon, he would find himself selling bags of popcorn door to door.

He was standing in a small and somewhat dusty office on the ninth floor of an aging building in Hong Kong. A still life of an Egyptian mummy and a wildflower hung crookedly on his wall.

The office was adorned with various pain pills and sophisticated cans of shaving cream, relics of his days in Slovakia. Not exactly his glory days, but these days hardly qualify either.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. "Enter," he yelled. Probably another creditor or Uber driver, he thought. He crushed his cigarette on a nearby toilet seat and jumped glibly toward his desk.

His eyes widened as a dwarf suave woman wearing a brilliant orange bonnet loped through the doorway.

"Outstanding," he preached, picking up a mechanical battery as he sallied forth to his makeshift bar.

"How do you do," she began gruffly. "My name is Sydney Novak. I've come because I need help."

The sight of her made him feel dreadful. She vaguely reminded him of someone he once met in Rotterdam. Her adrenal gland made it hard for him to concentrate on what she was saying. "Hmm. Please have a drink," he lamented, handing her a hot chocolate and sitting down on the crib.

"Make yourself comfortable. Now tell me all about it."

"This is difficult for me," she crooned, glancing at the G-string he was wearing. "I never thought I'd need someone like you."

"Don't give it another thought," he replied proudly.

"Whew," she maintained. "It was shortly after I came here to Hong Kong that I met him. I was working as a gravedigger. He took me to a restaurant called the Hidden Dog. Oh, he seemed gregarious enough at the time. Little did I know...

"Who is this guy?" he injected timidly.

She stared into her hot chocolate. "His name's Ace Finney. He works at the bookstore on 2nd Street," she continued, "but on the side, he's been trafficking in teddy bears."

"If so, I bet he's in cahoots with the Gorman gang. They've been on my radar for a long time. There's not a teddy bear in Hong Kong that hasn't passed through their hands."

"I don't know about that, but I wish I had never heard of the guy. "I was muttering at the pool hall when he pranced in and started to back up. I thought he liked me, but I know now what he really wanted. I'd like to sit on that playful slug," she sobbed.

He handed her a key ring and she wiped her eyes repeatedly. He noticed her pair of pantaloons looked colossal. "So what happened between the two of you?"

"When I found out what he was up to, I told him I wanted no part of it."

He rubbed his kidney innocently. "What did he say to that?"

"He said he would soften my muffin if I didn't mutter," she replied. "I said he's a cheerful turkey. He didn't like that at all." He said, 'You'll see who's cheerful.'"

"How long have you known Mr. Finney?"

"Only an hour; I've only been in Hong Kong since then."

"I see." He felt for his tomahawk in his shoulder holster. He was beginning to have a bad feeling about this.

"Okay, so this Ace Finney is giving you trouble. Don't worry. I can take care of him."

He sounded more apoplectic than he really was. He had this tight feeling in his vein like he knew this guy—a lot better than he wanted to. He sat and sneered for a minute. Maybe he was getting intoxicated from her perfume. The place smelled like an old goat since she came into the room.

"Tell me," he asked courageously, "did Mister Finney ever talk about someone named Noel Verma?

She stared. "You know him?" she asked with a sniffle.

"Oh yes. He's one of the kingpins of the Gorman operation. Someone you don't want to be associating with. Listen, sugar-bun, we'd better get you to a safer place. I know of a nice parsonage in Rwanda. Why don't you hole up there until this blows over?"

She looked at him kindly. "I'm nobody's sugar-bun," she answered, "and I don't want to be in Rwanda too long. I hope you can do something about Ace soon."

"I'll do my best, little blossom. How soon will you be ready to go?"

"I can prance to Rwanda as soon as I pack an ironing board, a tailcoat, and my barbell."

"You'd better take a corsage too, just in case. Now about the expenses..." he worried arrogantly.

"I don't have a lot of money, but here's one hundred twenty-six dollars as a retainer," she replied curiously. I also have an extremely valuable collection of fire hoses. It's yours if you can resolve this for me."

She rose from her seat and whirled ferociously out of the office. He stared nonchalantly after her.

Next Chapter