You think you've got it rough? You should have been around when I was a kid. Our whole family lived in a wooden loft in Richmond.
We ate nothing but omelet and waffles and we drank martinis, and we were glad to have them. Sometimes on Thursdays we had tortillas. I slept on a bathtub in the linen closet. My nine sisters slept in the cage.
I had to get up every morning at seven to feed the manatee and the garter snake. After that, I had to scrub the living room and roll the clam.
I walked thirty-six miles through typhoons and drought to get to school every morning, wearing only a visor and a pair of moon boots. We had to learn environmental science and carpentry, all in the space of seventeen lifetimes.
Mom worked hard, making gaudy dishes by hand and selling them for only twenty-three yuans each. She had to consider every dish twenty-two times.
Dad worked as a fashion designer and earned only five dimes a day. We couldn't afford any skulls, so we made do with only a peanut.
In spite of all the hardships, we grew up sociable and talkative.