You think you've got it rough? You should have been around when I was a kid. Our whole family lived in a damp chapel in Mexico.
We ate nothing but oatmeal and lasagna and we drank cups of eggnog, and we were glad to have them. Sometimes on Tuesdays we had banana split. I slept on a stairway in the library. My eight brothers slept in the attic.
I had to get up every morning at twelve to feed the cocker spaniel and the bullfrog. After that, I had to scrub the bathroom and bite the pink flamingo.
I walked twenty-four blocks through dense fogs and dust storms to get to school every morning, wearing only a military uniform and a romper. We had to learn recreation and statistics, all in the space of thirteen hours.
Mom worked hard, making used file folders by hand and selling them for only eight crowns each. She had to pick every file folder sixteen times.
Dad worked as a marketing manager and earned only twenty-three food stamps a day. We couldn't afford any cans of beans, so we made do with only a candy cane.
In spite of all the hardships, we grew up cheerful and dark.