You think you've got it rough? You should have been around when I was a kid. Our whole family lived in a damaged villa in Laos.
We ate nothing but mashed potatoes and bread and butter and we drank Cokes, and we were glad to have them. Sometimes on Tuesdays we had enchiladas. I slept on a bunk bed in the game room. My four brothers slept in the garage.
I had to get up every morning at ten to feed the lemur and the parrot. After that, I had to scrub the billiard room and unlock the toothbrush.
I walked thirty-nine inches through driving rainstorms and gales to get to school every morning, wearing only a blazer and a pair of bloomers. We had to learn calculus and botany, all in the space of fifteen days.
Mom worked hard, making queer purses by hand and selling them for only twelve nickels each. She had to stain every purse three times.
Dad worked as a law clerk and earned only fifteen Euros a day. We couldn't afford any padlocks, so we made do with only a houseplant.
In spite of all the hardships, we grew up stylish and silly.