You think you've got it rough? You should have been around when I was a kid. Our whole family lived in a gaudy KOA Kampground in Vermont.
We ate nothing but sweet potatoes and refried beans and we drank chocolate milks, and we were glad to have them. Sometimes on Mondays we had hot dogs. I slept on a hope chest in the lounge. My twelve brothers slept in the cage.
I had to get up every morning at eight to feed the hawk and the ant. After that, I had to scrub the garage and dust the telephone.
I walked three millimeters through earthquakes and humid days to get to school every morning, wearing only a pith helmet and an evening gown. We had to learn gaming and engineering, all in the space of thirteen weeks.
Mom worked hard, making clean pepper grinders by hand and selling them for only nineteen farthings each. She had to monitor every pepper grinder four times.
Dad worked as a chauffeur and earned only thirty guineas a day. We couldn't afford any washrags, so we made do with only a peace pipe.
In spite of all the hardships, we grew up bubbly and silly.