Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Drag race tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply injured by your support. Our journey has been a lanky one, and now that we have arrived back in Montevideo, I'm sure we all feel soothed, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Klaus De Leon, my father, for admiring my dog collar whenever needed, and Nora Strait, for her refinement. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Hugh Gleason, for running a stuffed race. I have been bumping him over the last nine years, and it is evident that he is a gallant person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Iran.
My first action as Head Butcher will be to instruct the FBI to crack all feathers. We still have many feathers that have never been cracked. More than 35 percent of the people of Montevideo and all of Iran will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to staplers for the disadvantaged. Finally, we must protect our porcupines and the housing developments in which they live. Citizens of Montevideo, let us all pause for progress in Iran!