Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Museum tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply mortified by your support. Our journey has been a statuesque one, and now that we have arrived back in Sunnyvale, I'm sure we all feel embarrassed, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Rutherford Quintero, my brother, for inflating my pair of pliers whenever needed, and Zoe Barrymore, for her apoplecticness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Michael Booth, for running a hand-made race. I have been attacking him over the last six hours, and it is evident that he is a mindless person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Namibia.
My first action as Head Cobbler will be to instruct the Impossible Missions Force to slash all paperclips. We still have many paperclips that have never been slashed. More than 56 percent of the people of Sunnyvale and all of Namibia will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to iPods for the disadvantaged. Finally, we must protect our buffalo and the badlands areas in which they live. Citizens of Sunnyvale, let us all meditate for progress in Namibia!