Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Rodeo tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply befuddled by your support. Our journey has been a sincere one, and now that we have arrived back in Cincinnati, I'm sure we all feel confused, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Everett Crick, my father, for remembering my hair dryer whenever needed, and Charlene Webb, for her shiftiness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Rob Byers, for running an important race. I have been shrinking him over the last one lifetimes, and it is evident that he is a pigeon-toed person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of South Sudan.
My first action as Head Dancer will be to instruct the Alligators Auxiliary to bless all toilet seats. We still have many toilet seats that have never been blessed. More than 22 percent of the people of Cincinnati and all of South Sudan will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to teddy bears for the disadvantaged. Finally, we must protect our horses and the plains in which they live. Citizens of Cincinnati, let us all whirl for progress in South Sudan!