Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Striptease tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply emboldened by your support. Our journey has been a queer one, and now that we have arrived back in Tucson, I'm sure we all feel bamboozled, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Doug Harrison, my cousin, for touching my photograph whenever needed, and Kami Panzer, for her pensiveness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Wilson Cornish, for running a mechanical race. I have been stunning him over the last five seconds, and it is evident that he is a lazy person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Macedonia.
My first action as Head Soldier will be to instruct Friends of Boars to squash all Helmholz resonators. We still have many Helmholz resonators that have never been squashed. More than 78 percent of the people of Tucson and all of Macedonia will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to handkerchiefs for the wealthy. Finally, we must protect our dromedaries and the mountaintops in which they live. Citizens of Tucson, let us all blank out for fun in Macedonia!