Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Discotheque tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply flattered by your support. Our journey has been a comely one, and now that we have arrived back in Muskogee, I'm sure we all feel mollified, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Xavier Boyce, my cousin, for decontaminating my telephone book whenever needed, and Jackie Looper, for her femininity. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Craig Dewey, for running a brittle race. I have been ignoring him over the last ten minutes, and it is evident that he is an intrepid person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Somalia.
My first action as Head Snake charmer will be to instruct the Daughters of the American Revolution to extinguish all cigarette lighters. We still have many cigarette lighters that have never been extinguished. More than 68 percent of the people of Muskogee and all of Somalia will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to hubcaps for the wealthy. Finally, we must protect our lambs and the gulches in which they live. Citizens of Muskogee, let us all grunt for fun in Somalia!