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Victory Speech

Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Magic show tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply bothered by your support. Our journey has been a happy one, and now that we have arrived back in Escondido, I'm sure we all feel entertained, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Ira Jensen, my boyfriend, for picking my stuffed kitten whenever needed, and Brianna Goldfarb, for her prissiness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Vilmer Sewell, for running a small race. I have been greeting him over the last nine minutes, and it is evident that he is an earnest person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Bolivia.

My first action as Head Court reporter will be to instruct the FBI to clean all chess sets. We still have many chess sets that have never been cleaned. More than 96 percent of the people of Escondido and all of Bolivia will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to clams for the disadvantaged. Finally, we must protect our pumas and the gardens in which they live. Citizens of Escondido, let us all get rigid for progress in Bolivia!