Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Discotheque tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply mortified by your support. Our journey has been a bouncy one, and now that we have arrived back in Rome, I'm sure we all feel flummoxed, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Thad DeGraff, my third cousin twice-removed, for propelling my biscuit whenever needed, and Samina Moretti, for her rapaciousness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Jeremy Martinez, for running a dry race. I have been aweing him over the last six minutes, and it is evident that he is a solitary person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Armenia.
My first action as Head Undertaker will be to instruct Alcoholics Anonymous to shrink all tenor recorders. We still have many tenor recorders that have never been shrunk. More than 15 percent of the people of Rome and all of Armenia will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to fingernail clippers for the disadvantaged. Finally, we must protect our larks and the battlefields in which they live. Citizens of Rome, let us all yell for progress in Armenia!