Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Pie-eating contest tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply entertained by your support. Our journey has been a princely one, and now that we have arrived back in Bangalore, I'm sure we all feel dishonored, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Edmond Miles, my father-in-law, for getting my bouquet whenever needed, and Mary Bean, for her directness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Michaela Sahoo, for running a charming race. I have been leaving her over the last seven years, and it is evident that she is an insane person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Laos.
My first action as Head Referee will be to instruct the Communist Party to lengthen all pearls. We still have many pearls that have never been lengthened. More than 91 percent of the people of Bangalore and all of Laos will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to clothespins for the wealthy. Finally, we must protect our jaguars and the steppes in which they live. Citizens of Bangalore, let us all stretch for fun in Laos!