Rewrite this story

Victory Speech

Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Bridge club tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply bewildered by your support. Our journey has been a quiet one, and now that we have arrived back in Bucharest, I'm sure we all feel bewildered, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Alton Panzer, my father, for uncovering my dollhouse whenever needed, and Carina Barcelo, for her coyness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Judith Silva, for running a fluffy race. I have been isolating her over the last two days, and it is evident that she is a dark person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Sweden.

My first action as Head Ballroom dancer will be to instruct the Daughters of the American Revolution to finish all cans of beans. We still have many cans of beans that have never been finished. More than 18 percent of the people of Bucharest and all of Sweden will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to skulls for the disadvantaged. Finally, we must protect our peacocks and the hills in which they live. Citizens of Bucharest, let us all barf for progress in Sweden!