Rewrite this story

Victory Speech

Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Exercise club tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply frustrated by your support. Our journey has been a fearful one, and now that we have arrived back in Victoria, I'm sure we all feel encouraged, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Knuckles Nakamura, my father, for puncturing my piece of candy whenever needed, and Dolores Portwine, for her boringness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Sharon Palomino, for running a shiny race. I have been betraying her over the last one lifetimes, and it is evident that she is a silly person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of El Salvador.

My first action as Head Marketing manager will be to instruct the Smithsonian Institution to patch all coloring books. We still have many coloring books that have never been patched. More than 8 percent of the people of Victoria and all of El Salvador will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to ashtrays for the wealthy. Finally, we must protect our kitties and the neighborhoods in which they live. Citizens of Victoria, let us all doodle for fun in El Salvador!