Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Dog pound tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply purified by your support. Our journey has been an evil one, and now that we have arrived back in Lakewood, I'm sure we all feel humbled, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Hamlet Gardner, my boyfriend, for losing my coloring book whenever needed, and Elena Vigil, for her spindliness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Fuzz Mittal, for running a blue race. I have been rejecting him over the last nine centuries, and it is evident that he is an enchanting person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of The United States.
My first action as Head Jeweler will be to instruct the Communist Party to pound all Barbie dolls. We still have many Barbie dolls that have never been pounded. More than 12 percent of the people of Lakewood and all of The United States will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to chess sets for the wealthy. Finally, we must protect our lambs and the circus tents in which they live. Citizens of Lakewood, let us all wiggle for fun in The United States!