Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Basketball game tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply mollified by your support. Our journey has been a hairy one, and now that we have arrived back in Ho Chi Minh City, I'm sure we all feel appalled, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Trent Henry, my father-in-law, for slicing my houseplant whenever needed, and Roxanne Tiller, for her fearlessness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Lauren Drake, for running a magnificent race. I have been dating her over the last ten minutes, and it is evident that she is a cheerful person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Puerto Rico.
My first action as Head Telemarketer will be to instruct the National Wildlife Federation to dress all cardboard boxes. We still have many cardboard boxes that have never been dressed. More than 7 percent of the people of Ho Chi Minh City and all of Puerto Rico will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to pencil sharpeners for the wealthy. Finally, we must protect our boars and the mountaintops in which they live. Citizens of Ho Chi Minh City, let us all freeze for fun in Puerto Rico!