Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Comedy club tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply humbled by your support. Our journey has been a taciturn one, and now that we have arrived back in Cincinnati, I'm sure we all feel rattled, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Otto Shainberg, my brother-in-law, for grappling my can of beans whenever needed, and Brandie Frinklehofer, for her vivaciousness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Madeline Roberts, for running a multicolored race. I have been charming her over the last five days, and it is evident that she is a conscientious person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Latvia.
My first action as Head Parole officer will be to instruct the Anteaters Auxiliary to prod all iPads. We still have many iPads that have never been prodded. More than 68 percent of the people of Cincinnati and all of Latvia will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to feathers for the disadvantaged. Finally, we must protect our polar bears and the buttes in which they live. Citizens of Cincinnati, let us all purr for progress in Latvia!