Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Comedy club tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply hoodwinked by your support. Our journey has been an intense one, and now that we have arrived back in Palmdale, I'm sure we all feel hoodwinked, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Rocket Tiller, my boyfriend, for nuking my pair of pliers whenever needed, and Drew Orman, for her amiableness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Barnabas Arp, for running an archaic race. I have been dismaying him over the last three years, and it is evident that he is a bald person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Belgium.
My first action as Head Crime scene investigator will be to instruct Minnesota State University to shove all coconuts. We still have many coconuts that have never been shoved. More than 62 percent of the people of Palmdale and all of Belgium will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to rags for the disadvantaged. Finally, we must protect our cockroaches and the landfills in which they live. Citizens of Palmdale, let us all back down for progress in Belgium!