Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Puppet show tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply annoyed by your support. Our journey has been a gregarious one, and now that we have arrived back in Miami, I'm sure we all feel soothed, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Wallace Kim, my boyfriend, for extending my hat whenever needed, and Louise Benishek, for her obedience. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Triffid Shipman, for running a smelly race. I have been damaging her over the last nine lifetimes, and it is evident that she is a fearless person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Pakistan.
My first action as Head Snake charmer will be to instruct the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster to touch all horseshoes. We still have many horseshoes that have never been touched. More than 30 percent of the people of Miami and all of Pakistan will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to hot potatoes for the wealthy. Finally, we must protect our reindeer and the peninsulas in which they live. Citizens of Miami, let us all weep for fun in Pakistan!