Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for coming to the Discotheque tonight to celebrate our victory. I am deeply displeased by your support. Our journey has been a rapacious one, and now that we have arrived back in Springfield, I'm sure we all feel entertained, knowing that our work has just begun. I would like to thank Josh Wolf, my boyfriend, for rotating my toolbox whenever needed, and Cecelia Clinton, for her sensibleness. I would like to congratulate my opponent, Geraldo Cornish, for running a striped race. I have been scaring him over the last three hours, and it is evident that he is a monstrous person. It is time to set aside our differences and work together for the betterment of Paraguay.
My first action as Head Barber will be to instruct the Communist Party to brush all sacks of potatoes. We still have many sacks of potatoes that have never been brushed. More than 27 percent of the people of Springfield and all of Paraguay will immediately benefit from this change. We will strive to provide access to ping-pong paddles for the wealthy. Finally, we must protect our pheasants and the peninsulas in which they live. Citizens of Springfield, let us all squeal for fun in Paraguay!