Rewrite this story

Letter To Santa

Dear Santa,

For Christmas I would like four valuable boxes of Kleenex, three multicolored calculators, three ruined apples, and four smelly apples.

I have been very choleric this year, so please give me more than you do Rico.

P.S. I'll put a plate of Hamburger Helper and a cosmopolitan on the chest of drawers for you.

Your friend,

Rip