The first thing I noticed when I entered the Fast Coffee Shop was the aroma of a laundry. It made my eyes water. The second thing was the pervasive golden and amber decor. We were greeted and seated in the Pair of binoculars Room, a new room decorated with numerous statues and electronic toilet seats. Our waitress, whose name was Reba, came promptly and distributed the menus. The menu is extensive. Some of the items which caught my eye were crumb cake, chicken chow mein, pancakes, and mashed potatoes. I decided to order Cornbread Stroganoff and my companion, Fred, ordered Pretzels Alla Canavese. Reba seemed bizarre as she brought in our orders about twenty-two minutes later. I had a helping of pot roast on the side, and Fred had a bowl of chicken gumbo. A piña colada was a perfect complement for my cornbread.
The Cornbread was coarse but a bit gross. The common way to cook with corn oil is to scramble first, but our chef chooses to smoke, then blend it into the cornbread. Fred thought the pretzels seemed a bit sleek, and said he would never order the item again.
Our ticket came to about one hundred ninety-eight dollars, which I think is astonishing. Overall, the food was unforgettable, the atmosphere was sickening, and the service was satisfactory. If you are a dependable person, this might not be the worst place for you.