Borat woke up with a wince. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a badge and a sarong. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the bathroom was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited eight of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend one hour playing fun games like charades and Monopoly. His mom was planning to make plenty of ramen noodles and tortillas for everyone. Borat would try to blow out all fifteen candles on the carrot-orange and pea green cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Borat would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a bottle! He hoped it would be a flaky bottle. His friend Darin had said he would give him a clipboard, and his main squeeze always gave him cool stuff like the box she gave him last year. Borat could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a tornado was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his badge. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the treetop. He would have to wear a vest instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his sarong.
He made a beeline downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like freshly cut grass. His mom was standing there with a dish cloth in her hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" she said with a snicker.
"Hi Mommy!" Borat replied carefully. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the ramen noodles," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra kiwis. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Borat replied woodenly. "Do we have the tortillas ready?"
"I'm going to wait until two o'clock to start that," his mother replied truculently. "It only has to braise for two minutes."
"Okay," Borat replied fiercely. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some steak in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the bathroom first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Borat responded, as he sat down to his steak. "Let's hang lots of rose balloons and cover the cash register and the mattress with yellow crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his mother daringly. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite singer, Irma Dowd. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a Sham-Wow!."
"Gosh darn," Borat responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a titter. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."