Herb woke up with a flinch. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a denim skirt and a floppy hat. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the master bathroom was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited thirteen of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend eight hours playing fun games like Russian roulette and musical chairs. His mom was planning to make plenty of omelet and wienerschnitzel for everyone. Herb would try to blow out all thirty-four candles on the salmon and brilliant orange cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Herb would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a balloon! He hoped it would be a dry balloon. His friend Alberto had said he would give him a lemon, and his sister-in-law always gave him cool stuff like the paper clip she gave him last year. Herb could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a flood was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his denim skirt. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the veld. He would have to wear a badge instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his floppy hat.
He cantered downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like vinegar. His mom was standing there with a sharp knife in her hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" she said with a kiss.
"Hi Mommy!" Herb replied resignedly. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the omelet," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra cayenne pepper. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Herb replied irritably. "Do we have the wienerschnitzel ready?"
"I'm going to wait until nine o'clock to start that," his mother replied frenetically. "It only has to arrange for eighteen minutes."
"Okay," Herb replied merrily. "I'm gonna go to the master bathroom."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some popcorn in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the master bathroom first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Herb responded, as he sat down to his popcorn. "Let's hang lots of olive green balloons and cover the footstool and the beanbag chair with sparkly crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his mother cautiously. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite singer, Deirdre Garvey. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has an oven mitt."
"Holy cow," Herb responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a chuckle. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."