Olga woke up with a dope slap. Today was her birthday! She was going to have a lot of fun today. First, she would dress up in a necktie and a heavy layer of makeup. Then, she would run downstairs to see if the solarium was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited fifteen of her closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend three hours playing fun games like crazy eights and musical chairs. Her dad was planning to make plenty of duck a l'orange and chocolate-covered ants for everyone. Olga would try to blow out all twenty-eight candles on the navy blue and purple cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Olga would be opening her gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a roll of toilet paper! She hoped it would be a dirty roll of toilet paper. Her friend Jasmine had said she would give her a map, and her aunt always gave her cool stuff like the billfold she gave her last year. Olga could hardly wait!
She glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a pall of doom was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. She looked in her closet for her necktie. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from her day at the gulch. She would have to wear a babushka instead. She didn't really care, as long as she could still wear her heavy layer of makeup.
She sashayed downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like aftershave lotion. Her dad was standing there with a pair of chopsticks in his hand. "Happy Birthday Honey!" he said with a guffaw.
"Hi Daddy!" Olga replied bitterly. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the duck a l'orange," he replied. "I decided to make it with extra ground pork. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Olga replied carelessly. "Do we have the chocolate-covered ants ready?"
"I'm going to wait until six o'clock to start that," her father replied sourly. "It only has to smoke for forty-one minutes."
"Okay," Olga replied reluctantly. "I'm gonna go to the solarium."
"First, young lady, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some biscuits and gravy in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the solarium first?" she begged.
"It looks just like it always does," her father replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Olga responded, as she sat down to her biscuits and gravy. "Let's hang lots of magenta balloons and cover the safe and the ottoman with olive drab crepe paper."
"That's fine," said her father carelessly. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite singer, Erin Bede. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a mixing spoon."
"Big deal," Olga responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Father with a jeer. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."