Lear woke up with a dope slap. Today was his birthday! He was going to have a lot of fun today. First, he would dress up in a pair of flip-flops and a hoop skirt. Then, he would run downstairs to see if the patio was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited four of his closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend five hours playing fun games like Snakes and Ladders and checkers. His mom was planning to make plenty of sauerkraut and mushroom quiche for everyone. Lear would try to blow out all fifteen candles on the olive drab and purple cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Lear would be opening his gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a hat! He hoped it would be a torn hat. His friend Flash had said he would give him a towel, and his mother-in-law always gave him cool stuff like the pearl she gave him last year. Lear could hardly wait!
He glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a blizzard was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. He looked in his closet for his pair of flip-flops. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from his day at the prairie. He would have to wear a cap instead. He didn't really care, as long as he could still wear his hoop skirt.
He sped downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like rubbing alcohol. His mom was standing there with a meat thermometer in her hand. "Happy Birthday Son!" she said with a bound.
"Hi Mommy!" Lear replied despondently. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the sauerkraut," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra ketchup. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Lear replied crankily. "Do we have the mushroom quiche ready?"
"I'm going to wait until one o'clock to start that," his mother replied sourly. "It only has to microwave for eighty-three minutes."
"Okay," Lear replied calmly. "I'm gonna go to the patio."
"First, young man, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some macaroni in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the patio first?" he begged.
"It looks just like it always does," his mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Lear responded, as he sat down to his macaroni. "Let's hang lots of terra cotta balloons and cover the bar stool and the wardrobe with rose crepe paper."
"That's fine," said his mother hungrily. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite singer, Charlene Small. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a cheesecloth."
"Okay," Lear responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a grunt. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."