Loretta woke up with a bound. Today was her birthday! She was going to have a lot of fun today. First, she would dress up in a pocket watch and a stovepipe hat. Then, she would run downstairs to see if the cage was decorated and ready for the party. They had invited twenty-eight of her closest friends. When everyone arrived, they would spend one hour playing fun games like volleyball and shuffleboard. Her mom was planning to make plenty of falafel and jambalaya for everyone. Loretta would try to blow out all twenty-two candles on the lime-green and maroon cake. While the guests were eating their cake, Loretta would be opening her gifts. Maybe the first package would contain a diamond! She hoped it would be a ridiculous diamond. Her friend Clive had said he would give her a painting, and her mother-in-law always gave her cool stuff like the cigarette lighter she gave her last year. Loretta could hardly wait!
She glanced out the window and was surprised to see that a dense fog was on its way. Hopefully, that wouldn't deter anyone from coming. She looked in her closet for her pocket watch. It wasn't there. Uh oh. It was still dirty from her day at the wasteland. She would have to wear a helmet instead. She didn't really care, as long as she could still wear her stovepipe hat.
She trotted downstairs and went into the kitchen. It smelled like vinegar. Her mom was standing there with a bare foot in her hand. "Happy Birthday Honey!" she said with a pout.
"Hi Mommy!" Loretta replied valiantly. "What are you doing?"
"I'm making the falafel," she replied. "I decided to make it with extra trout. Hope that's okay with you."
"I guess so," Loretta replied menacingly. "Do we have the jambalaya ready?"
"I'm going to wait until nine o'clock to start that," her mother replied fearlessly. "It only has to slow cook for fifty-five minutes."
"Okay," Loretta replied glibly. "I'm gonna go to the cage."
"First, young lady, you need to have some breakfast. I've got some borscht in the skillet for you."
"Can't I just take a peek at the cage first?" she begged.
"It looks just like it always does," her mother replied. "Remember, I'm depending on you to help with the decorating."
"Oh yeah," Loretta responded, as she sat down to her borscht. "Let's hang lots of brilliant orange balloons and cover the casket and the hatstand with violet crepe paper."
"That's fine," said her mother caustically. "The paper plates and napkins have pictures of your favorite Tv star, Tracy Dinklefloss. Set the table with them, and make sure everyone has a potato masher."
"What in tarnation," Loretta responded. "I'm done, can I get started with the decorating now?"
"I think you inhaled your food," said Mother with a shiver. "Go on, I'll be there in a few minutes."