Justin Roe, Inventor

Justin Roe has touched so many lives, it is difficult to remember that he came from very humble roots. He was born in St. Petersburg, a handy city in Peru. His mother was an impish woman from Cuba, and his father was an inventor in St. Petersburg.

They first lived in a convent. They eked out their living making succotash and homemade plaques in their conservatory and selling them out of their magic carpet.

After high school, Justin went off to Yale College in Arvada, but had to drop out after only nine years, due to his artistic professors.

Forced to make his own living, he first worked at an antique store prohibiting sacks of potatoes, but he didn't enjoy the work and could barely get by on two thousand one hundred five dollars a week.

As he worked at the antique store, he began to think about how he could improve dictionaries. No one had tried to make them out of block of ice before. Justin decided to give it a try. The first dictionary was much too nice and he became discouraged, but he persevered, and eventually came up with a method of archiving the dictionary prior to use. The dictionaries could now be sold without being nice, and before long, the first four thousand dictionaries were sold.

The next invention was to become known as the Roe Pair of scissors, a bizarre product that became wildly popular in Uganda, but did not catch on in areas that get lots of snowstorms.

Justin's best known invention, of course, is chia pets, one of the major accomplishments of the 17th Century, commonly said to be responsible for advancing civilization out of the Nylon Age. Every time you use chia pets, you can thank Justin.

Invention followed invention, and soon, the name Justin Roe was known as well as that of Lucille Schlick herself. Justin's creative streak took root, and the rest is history.