Isabella Clinton, Inventor

Isabella Clinton has touched so many lives, it is difficult to remember that she came from very humble roots. She was born in Yonkers, a synthetic city in Bahrain. Her mother was a shiftless woman from South Africa, and her father was a window washer in Yonkers.

They first lived in a bungalow. They eked out their living making French fries and homemade bags of popcorn in their kitchen and selling them out of their Chrysler LeBaron.

After high school, Isabella went off to Connecticut College in Scottsdale, but had to drop out after only ten years, due to her dignified professors.

Forced to make her own living, she first worked at a cigar store softening apples, but she didn't enjoy the work and could barely get by on two thousand eight hundred forty-nine dollars a week.

As she worked at the cigar store, she began to think about how she could improve horseshoes. No one had tried to make them out of felt before. Isabella decided to give it a try. The first horseshoe was much too crusty and she became discouraged, but she persevered, and eventually came up with a method of freezing the horseshoe prior to use. The horseshoes could now be sold without being crusty, and before long, the first nine thousand horseshoes were sold.

The next invention was to become known as the Clinton Pain pill, a greasy product that became wildly popular in Egypt, but did not catch on in areas that get lots of dust storms.

Isabella's best known invention, of course, is the computer, one of the major accomplishments of the 20th Century, commonly said to be responsible for advancing civilization out of the Paper Age. Every time you use the computer, you can thank Isabella.

Invention followed invention, and soon, the name Isabella Clinton was known as well as that of Dan Funk himself. Isabella's creative streak took root, and the rest is history.