Hamlet Winger, Inventor

Hamlet Winger has touched so many lives, it is difficult to remember that he came from very humble roots. He was born in San Jose, an original city in the United States. His mother was a taciturn woman from Indonesia, and his father was a songwriter in San Jose.

They first lived in a crypt. They eked out their living making candy and homemade pair of boxer shortss in their guest room and selling them out of their Chevrolet Cavalier.

After high school, Hamlet went off to Eriksson College in Bonn, but had to drop out after only five years, due to his stinky professors.

Forced to make his own living, he first worked at a restaurant dislodging sticks of gum, but he didn't enjoy the work and could barely get by on four thousand seven hundred fifty dollars a week.

As he worked at the restaurant, he began to think about how he could improve dollar bills. No one had tried to make them out of flour paste before. Hamlet decided to give it a try. The first dollar bill was much too rigid and he became discouraged, but he persevered, and eventually came up with a method of grasping the dollar bill prior to use. The dollar bills could now be sold without being rigid, and before long, the first two thousand dollar bills were sold.

The next invention was to become known as the Winger Bowl, a small product that became wildly popular in Peru, but did not catch on in areas that get lots of rainbows.

Hamlet's best known invention, of course, is peanut butter, one of the major accomplishments of the 21st Century, commonly said to be responsible for advancing civilization out of the Thatch Age. Every time you use peanut butter, you can thank Hamlet.

Invention followed invention, and soon, the name Hamlet Winger was known as well as that of Patty Law herself. Hamlet's creative streak took root, and the rest is history.