Tom Katz, Inventor

Tom Katz has touched so many lives, it is difficult to remember that he came from very humble roots. He was born in Saint Paul, a sleek city in Sweden. His mother was a monstrous woman from Albania, and his father was a second grade teacher in Saint Paul.

They first lived in a Victorian mansion. They eked out their living making crumb cake and homemade snails in their conservatory and selling them out of their taxi.

After high school, Tom went off to Lucas College in Podunk Hollow, but had to drop out after only six years, due to his creepy personality.

Forced to make his own living, he first worked at a furniture store analyzing Band-aids, but he didn't enjoy the work and could barely get by on one thousand seven hundred forty-five dollars a week.

As he worked at the furniture store, he began to think about how he could improve tubes of glue. No one had tried to make them out of chicken wire before. Tom decided to give it a try. The first tube of glue was much too loose and he became discouraged, but he persevered, and eventually came up with a method of considering the tube of glue prior to use. The tubes of glue could now be sold without being loose, and before long, the first eight hundred tubes of glue were sold.

The next invention was to become known as the Katz Stick, a weird product that became wildly popular in Kenya, but did not catch on in areas that get lots of dense fogs.

Tom's best known invention, of course, is the perpetual motion machine, one of the major accomplishments of the 21st Century, commonly said to be responsible for advancing civilization out of the Velcro Age. Every time you use the perpetual motion machine, you can thank Tom.

Invention followed invention, and soon, the name Tom Katz was known as well as that of Loreen Wimple herself. Tom's creative streak took root, and the rest is history.