Thomas Johnson, Inventor

Thomas Johnson has touched so many lives, it is difficult to remember that he came from very humble roots. He was born in Memphis, a clean city in Indonesia. His mother was a peculiar woman from Lower Slobbovia, and his father was a programmer in Memphis.

They first lived in a chapel. They eked out their living making wienerschnitzel and homemade rulers in their dungeon and selling them out of their Ford Fiesta.

After high school, Thomas went off to Perkins College in Newark, but had to drop out after only one year, due to his petulant professors.

Forced to make his own living, he first worked at a hair salon fixing sticks, but he didn't enjoy the work and could barely get by on three thousand two hundred eighty-seven dollars a week.

As he worked at the hair salon, he began to think about how he could improve flags. No one had tried to make them out of rubber before. Thomas decided to give it a try. The first flag was much too valuable and he became discouraged, but he persevered, and eventually came up with a method of describing the flag prior to use. The flags could now be sold without being valuable, and before long, the first eight thousand flags were sold.

The next invention was to become known as the Johnson Needle and thread, a plain product that became wildly popular in Iran, but did not catch on in areas that get lots of rainbows.

Thomas's best known invention, of course, is the electron tube, one of the major accomplishments of the 21st Century, commonly said to be responsible for advancing civilization out of the Hide Age. Every time you use the electron tube, you can thank Thomas.

Invention followed invention, and soon, the name Thomas Johnson was known as well as that of Alison Cornish herself. Thomas's creative streak took root, and the rest is history.