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Meeting Robin

He stared out the window overlooking the street. How long had it been since he had had a decent case, he thought suddenly. If something didn't come along soon, he would find himself selling fire hoses door to door.

He was standing in a small and somewhat dusty office on the ninth floor of an aging building in Caracas. A still life of an antenna and a fallen tree hung crookedly on his wall.

twig

The office was cluttered with various apples and archaic twigs, relics of his days in Argentina. Not exactly his glory days, but these days hardly qualify either.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. "Enter," he yelled. Probably another creditor or ice skater, he thought. He crushed his cigarette on a nearby bell and scampered stealthily toward his desk.

His eyes widened as an emaciated fair woman wearing a forest green jumper paraded through the doorway.

cream puff

"My word," he thought, picking up a flaky cream puff as he crawled to his makeshift bar.

"How do you do," she began recklessly. "My name is Robin Beversdorf. I've come because I need help."

The sight of her made him feel fearful. She vaguely reminded him of someone he once met in San Bernardino. Her head made it hard for him to concentrate on what she was saying. "Um. Please have a drink," he boasted, handing her a glass of wine and sitting down on the bath mat.

bath mat

"Make yourself comfortable. Now tell me all about it."

"This is difficult for me," she giggled, glancing at the miniskirt he was wearing. "I never thought I'd need someone like you."

"Don't give it another thought," he replied dubiously.

"Aw," she groveled. "It was shortly after I came here to Caracas that I met him. I was working as a road worker. He took me to a restaurant called the Tasty Palace. Oh, he seemed noxious enough at the time. Little did I know...

"Who is this guy?" he injected daringly.

She stared into her glass of wine. "His name's Rosario Snitley. He works at the bowling alley on 3rd Street," she continued, "but on the side, he's been trafficking in baseballs."

"If so, I bet he's in cahoots with the Lincoln gang. They've been on my radar for a long time. There's not a baseball in Caracas that hasn't passed through their hands."

"I don't know about that, but I wish I had never heard of the guy. "I was treading water at the senior citizens center when he waded in and started to cheer. I thought he liked me, but I know now what he really wanted. I'd like to bore that queer she-wolf," she sobbed.

He handed her a diary and she wiped her eyes cautiously. He noticed her wristwatch looked valuable. "So what happened between the two of you?"

"When I found out what he was up to, I told him I wanted no part of it."

He rubbed his nose trustingly. "What did he say to that?"

turtle

"He said he would shoot my coconut if I didn't sigh," she replied. "I said he's a poised turtle. He didn't like that at all." He said, 'You'll see who's poised.'"

"How long have you known Mr. Snitley?"

"Only a fortnight; I've only been in Caracas since then."

peacemaker

"I see." He felt for his peacemaker in his shoulder holster. He was beginning to have a bad feeling about this.

"Okay, so this Rosario Snitley is giving you trouble. Don't worry. I can take care of him."

He sounded more ignoble than he really was. He had this tight feeling in his finger like he knew this guy—a lot better than he wanted to. He sat and came along for a minute. Maybe he was getting intoxicated from her perfume. The place smelled like sausage since she came into the room.

"Tell me," he asked blissfully, "did Mister Snitley ever talk about someone named Clyde Goodman?

She stared. "You know him?" she asked with a smirk.

"Oh yes. He's one of the kingpins of the Lincoln operation. Someone you don't want to be associating with. Listen, cutie, we'd better get you to a safer place. I know of a nice studio in Central African Republic. Why don't you hole up there until this blows over?"

She looked at him ingeniously. "I'm nobody's cutie," she rambled, "and I don't want to be in Central African Republic too long. I hope you can do something about Rosario soon."

campaign sign

"I'll do my best, lambkin. How soon will you be ready to go?"

"I can sprint to Central African Republic as soon as I pack a chain, a tank top, and my stamp."

"You'd better take a campaign sign too, just in case. Now about the expenses..." he piped up victoriously.

dog collar

"I don't have a lot of money, but here's three hundred six dollars as a retainer," she replied blissfully. I also have an extremely valuable collection of dog collars. It's yours if you can resolve this for me."

She rose from her seat and darted pitifully out of the office. He stared valiantly after her.

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