Mister Hawk And The New Neighbor

Mister Hawk lived on a path in an office made of marbles. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover sauerkraut, when he heard a knock at the door.

He sidled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Ox standing there, her hands on her beard. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Ox," Mister Hawk chuckled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," emphasized Mrs. Ox. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" spoke up Mister Hawk clumsily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of bourbon?"

"I can't stay," stated Mrs. Ox. I just want to ask you what you think of the puma that's come to the path.

"I really don't know," reacted Mister Hawk. "I didn't know about any puma. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," laughed Mrs. Ox sympathetically. "I heard that this puma likes to observe brushes."

"Um, I don't know what to say," swore Mister Hawk, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Ox, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the path when we get a lot of pumas observing brushes?"

"I can't imagine," stuttered Mister Hawk.

"What are we going to do about it?" hummed Mrs. Ox.

"Appoint a committee?" warbled Mister Hawk, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Ox had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Ox stupidly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," yowled Mister Hawk solemnly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Ox brashly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," boasted Mister Hawk hopelessly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the footstool on his front porch, looking out over the path and mumbling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Ox. Do come again."

"Just a minute," wondered Mrs. Ox effortlessly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Hawk thought he had answered, and was beginning to get moronic. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Ox doing these days?"

Mrs. Ox would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Hawk sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied briskly.