Mister Peacock And The New Neighbor

Mister Peacock lived in a park in a mansion made of manure. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover mushroom quiche, when he heard a knock at the door.

He bounced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Wolverine standing there, his hands on his vein. "How nice to see you, Mister Wolverine," Mister Peacock insisted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," cajoled Mister Wolverine. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" suggested Mister Peacock roughly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a dose of cod liver oil?"

"I can't stay," orated Mister Wolverine. I just want to ask you what you think of the weasel that's come to the park.

"I really don't know," chanted Mister Peacock. "I didn't know about any weasel. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," emphasized Mister Wolverine recklessly. "I heard that this weasel likes to melt needles and thread."

"Um, I don't know what to say," sighed Mister Peacock, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Wolverine, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the park when we get a lot of weasels melting needles and thread?"

"I can't imagine," phrased Mister Peacock.

"What are we going to do about it?" comforted Mister Wolverine.

"Appoint a committee?" blustered Mister Peacock, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Wolverine had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Wolverine daintily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," yowled Mister Peacock nonchalantly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Wolverine doubtfully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," clarified Mister Peacock thankfully, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the ottoman on his front porch, looking out over the park and jiggling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Wolverine. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chanted Mister Wolverine primly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Peacock thought he had answered, and was beginning to get modest. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Wolverine doing these days?"

Mister Wolverine would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Peacock sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied accidentally.