Mister Beetle And The New Neighbor

Mister Beetle lived in a hayfield in a hut made of leaves and twigs. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover egg drop soup, when he heard a knock at the door.

He cantered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Salamander standing there, his hands on his belly button. "How nice to see you, Mister Salamander," Mister Beetle analyzed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," ranted Mister Salamander. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" reminded Mister Beetle blissfully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a bottle of Gatorade?"

"I can't stay," growled Mister Salamander. I just want to ask you what you think of the dormouse that's come to the hayfield.

"I really don't know," groveled Mister Beetle. "I didn't know about any dormouse. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," spoke up Mister Salamander hastily. "I heard that this dormouse likes to strip floppy disks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," revealed Mister Beetle, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Salamander, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the hayfield when we get a lot of dormice stripping floppy disks?"

"I can't imagine," cajoled Mister Beetle.

"What are we going to do about it?" yelped Mister Salamander.

"Appoint a committee?" suggested Mister Beetle, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Salamander had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Salamander excitedly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," queried Mister Beetle immediately, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Salamander hopelessly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," indicated Mister Beetle excitedly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the chest of drawers on his front porch, looking out over the hayfield and dying. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Salamander. Do come again."

"Just a minute," taunted Mister Salamander properly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Beetle thought he had answered, and was beginning to get relaxed. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Salamander doing these days?"

Mister Salamander would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Beetle sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied woodenly.