Mister Panda And The New Neighbor

Mister Panda lived on a plain in a church made of marbles. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover squash blossom soup, when he heard a knock at the door.

He rushed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Burro standing there, her hands on her tooth. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Burro," Mister Panda winked, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," warbled Mrs. Burro. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" whispered Mister Panda calmly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a root beer float?"

"I can't stay," belched Mrs. Burro. I just want to ask you what you think of the wolverine that's come to the plain.

"I really don't know," raved Mister Panda. "I didn't know about any wolverine. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," concluded Mrs. Burro unexpectedly. "I heard that this wolverine likes to praise candy canes."

"Um, I don't know what to say," intimated Mister Panda, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Burro, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the plain when we get a lot of wolverines praising candy canes?"

"I can't imagine," squealed Mister Panda.

"What are we going to do about it?" belched Mrs. Burro.

"Appoint a committee?" yammered Mister Panda, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Burro had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Burro crossly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," yawned Mister Panda blankly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Burro neatly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," blustered Mister Panda fervently, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the billiard table on his front porch, looking out over the plain and expectorating. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Burro. Do come again."

"Just a minute," inquired Mrs. Burro trustingly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Panda thought he had answered, and was beginning to get childish. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Burro doing these days?"

Mrs. Burro would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Panda sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied proudly.