Mister Siamese Cat And The New Neighbor

Mister Siamese cat lived in a field in a housing project made of paper clips. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover applesauce, when he heard a knock at the door.

He galloped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Quail standing there, his hands on his aorta. "How nice to see you, Mister Quail," Mister Siamese cat enunciated, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," reacted Mister Quail. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" screamed Mister Siamese cat lovingly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Pepto Bismol?"

"I can't stay," fumed Mister Quail. I just want to ask you what you think of the anaconda that's come to the field.

"I really don't know," begged Mister Siamese cat. "I didn't know about any anaconda. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," offered Mister Quail sympathetically. "I heard that this anaconda likes to burn Hostess Ding Dongs."

"Um, I don't know what to say," proposed Mister Siamese cat, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Quail, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the field when we get a lot of anacondas burning Hostess Ding Dongs?"

"I can't imagine," hummed Mister Siamese cat.

"What are we going to do about it?" voiced Mister Quail.

"Appoint a committee?" burbled Mister Siamese cat, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Quail had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Quail fondly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," uttered Mister Siamese cat jokingly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Quail sympathetically. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," yawned Mister Siamese cat cautiously, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the chest of drawers on his front porch, looking out over the field and frowning. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Quail. Do come again."

"Just a minute," swore Mister Quail busily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Siamese cat thought he had answered, and was beginning to get considerate. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Quail doing these days?"

Mister Quail would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Siamese cat sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied surreptitiously.