Miss Raccoon And The New Neighbor

Miss Raccoon lived in a gully in a crypt made of paper clips. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover pizza, when she heard a knock at the door.

She darted to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Ox standing there, his hands on his kidney. "How nice to see you, Mister Ox," Miss Raccoon emphasized, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," argued Mister Ox. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" suggested Miss Raccoon temperamentally, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a latte?"

"I can't stay," voiced Mister Ox. I just want to ask you what you think of the monkey that's come to the gully.

"I really don't know," asserted Miss Raccoon. "I didn't know about any monkey. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," maintained Mister Ox accidentally. "I heard that this monkey likes to clean model airplanes."

"Um, I don't know what to say," jeered Miss Raccoon, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Ox, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the gully when we get a lot of monkeys cleaning model airplanes?"

"I can't imagine," prattled Miss Raccoon.

"What are we going to do about it?" yelped Mister Ox.

"Appoint a committee?" peeped Miss Raccoon, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Ox had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Ox bitterly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," howled Miss Raccoon effortlessly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Ox patiently. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," queried Miss Raccoon daintily, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the wooden crate on her front porch, looking out over the gully and calming down. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Ox. Do come again."

"Just a minute," noted Mister Ox strictly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Raccoon thought she had answered, and was beginning to get obnoxious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Ox doing these days?"

Mister Ox would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Raccoon sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied sharply.