Mister Norway Rat And The New Neighbor

Mister Norway rat lived in a neighborhood in a convent made of logs. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover cinnamon toast, when he heard a knock at the door.

He scampered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Oyster standing there, her hands on her toupee. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Oyster," Mister Norway rat breathed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," howled Mrs. Oyster. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" pronounced Mister Norway rat clumsily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Mojito?"

"I can't stay," sputtered Mrs. Oyster. I just want to ask you what you think of the iguana that's come to the neighborhood.

"I really don't know," yowled Mister Norway rat. "I didn't know about any iguana. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," admitted Mrs. Oyster automatically. "I heard that this iguana likes to liquify keys."

"Um, I don't know what to say," remarked Mister Norway rat, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Oyster, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the neighborhood when we get a lot of iguanas liquifying keys?"

"I can't imagine," mused Mister Norway rat.

"What are we going to do about it?" declared Mrs. Oyster.

"Appoint a committee?" responded Mister Norway rat, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Oyster had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Oyster brashly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," hollered Mister Norway rat roughly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Oyster speedily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," groaned Mister Norway rat narrowly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the rocking chair on his front porch, looking out over the neighborhood and getting frazzled. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Oyster. Do come again."

"Just a minute," mouthed Mrs. Oyster numbly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Norway rat thought he had answered, and was beginning to get boring. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Oyster doing these days?"

Mrs. Oyster would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Norway rat sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied suspiciously.