Mister Polar Bear And The New Neighbor

Mister Polar bear lived on a cliff in an office made of nylon. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover chicken pot pie, when he heard a knock at the door.

He straggled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Ape standing there, his hands on his esophagus. "How nice to see you, Mister Ape," Mister Polar bear recited, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," squawked Mister Ape. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" queried Mister Polar bear doubtfully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of tea?"

"I can't stay," squeaked Mister Ape. I just want to ask you what you think of the hornet that's come to the cliff.

"I really don't know," cackled Mister Polar bear. "I didn't know about any hornet. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," questioned Mister Ape humbly. "I heard that this hornet likes to pack pens."

"Um, I don't know what to say," harangued Mister Polar bear, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Ape, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the cliff when we get a lot of hornets packing pens?"

"I can't imagine," griped Mister Polar bear.

"What are we going to do about it?" lectured Mister Ape.

"Appoint a committee?" debated Mister Polar bear, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Ape had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Ape gracefully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," groaned Mister Polar bear sweetly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Ape accidentally. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," raved Mister Polar bear patiently, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the bunk bed on his front porch, looking out over the cliff and pacing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Ape. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chimed Mister Ape innocently. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Polar bear thought he had answered, and was beginning to get clever. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Ape doing these days?"

Mister Ape would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Polar bear sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied patiently.