Miss Wallaby And The New Neighbor

Miss Wallaby lived on a battlefield in a mud hut made of lead. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover burritos, when she heard a knock at the door.

She tumbled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Ant standing there, her hands on her skull. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Ant," Miss Wallaby requested, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," drawled Mrs. Ant. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" argued Miss Wallaby oddly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cappuccino?"

"I can't stay," yawned Mrs. Ant. I just want to ask you what you think of the horsie that's come to the battlefield.

"I really don't know," conversed Miss Wallaby. "I didn't know about any horsie. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," roared Mrs. Ant sagely. "I heard that this horsie likes to pack bones."

"Um, I don't know what to say," squeaked Miss Wallaby, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Ant, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the battlefield when we get a lot of horsies packing bones?"

"I can't imagine," ranted Miss Wallaby.

"What are we going to do about it?" yelped Mrs. Ant.

"Appoint a committee?" screamed Miss Wallaby, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Ant had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Ant breathlessly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," wondered Miss Wallaby merrily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Ant numbly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," yammered Miss Wallaby neatly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the sofa on her front porch, looking out over the battlefield and barking. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Ant. Do come again."

"Just a minute," pointed out Mrs. Ant hastily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Wallaby thought she had answered, and was beginning to get garrulous. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Ant doing these days?"

Mrs. Ant would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Wallaby sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied frantically.