Miss Android And The New Neighbor

Miss Android lived on a veld in a Cape Cod made of cow pies. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover wienerschnitzel, when she heard a knock at the door.

She sallied forth to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Mosquito standing there, his hands on his esophagus. "How nice to see you, Mister Mosquito," Miss Android sighed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," comforted Mister Mosquito. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" raved Miss Android gruffly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Jack Daniel's?"

"I can't stay," questioned Mister Mosquito. I just want to ask you what you think of the pigeon that's come to the veld.

"I really don't know," commented Miss Android. "I didn't know about any pigeon. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," railed Mister Mosquito gruffly. "I heard that this pigeon likes to crush peanuts."

"Um, I don't know what to say," chuckled Miss Android, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Mosquito, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the veld when we get a lot of pigeons crushing peanuts?"

"I can't imagine," announced Miss Android.

"What are we going to do about it?" stammered Mister Mosquito.

"Appoint a committee?" mumbled Miss Android, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Mosquito had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Mosquito confidently. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," spoke up Miss Android courageously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Mosquito proudly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," proposed Miss Android carefully, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the canopy bed on her front porch, looking out over the veld and trembling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Mosquito. Do come again."

"Just a minute," hissed Mister Mosquito shyly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Android thought she had answered, and was beginning to get heavyset. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Mosquito doing these days?"

Mister Mosquito would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Android sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied ferociously.