Mister Warthog And The New Neighbor

Mister Warthog lived in a country meadow in a subway tunnel made of buffalo hides. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover egg drop soup, when he heard a knock at the door.

He sidled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Koala standing there, her hands on her hoof. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Koala," Mister Warthog mused, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," hissed Mrs. Koala. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" spewed Mister Warthog boldly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Seven and Seven?"

"I can't stay," wailed Mrs. Koala. I just want to ask you what you think of the camel that's come to the country meadow.

"I really don't know," simpered Mister Warthog. "I didn't know about any camel. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," exclaimed Mrs. Koala noisily. "I heard that this camel likes to strip towels."

"Um, I don't know what to say," spoke up Mister Warthog, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Koala, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the country meadow when we get a lot of camels stripping towels?"

"I can't imagine," quavered Mister Warthog.

"What are we going to do about it?" invited Mrs. Koala.

"Appoint a committee?" invited Mister Warthog, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Koala had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Koala stealthily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," sneered Mister Warthog quickly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Koala ruefully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," provoked Mister Warthog blankly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the counter on his front porch, looking out over the country meadow and nodding. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Koala. Do come again."

"Just a minute," contended Mrs. Koala blankly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Warthog thought he had answered, and was beginning to get haggard. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Koala doing these days?"

Mrs. Koala would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Warthog sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied neatly.