Mister Chihuahua And The New Neighbor

Mister Chihuahua lived in a gulch in a housing project made of Sheetrock. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover tofu, when he heard a knock at the door.

He swaggered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Monkey standing there, her hands on her belly. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Monkey," Mister Chihuahua crooned, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," drawled Mrs. Monkey. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" blurted Mister Chihuahua jokingly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Mudslide?"

"I can't stay," rambled Mrs. Monkey. I just want to ask you what you think of the Dalmatian that's come to the gulch.

"I really don't know," begged Mister Chihuahua. "I didn't know about any Dalmatian. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," debated Mrs. Monkey threateningly. "I heard that this Dalmatian likes to grease clothespins."

"Um, I don't know what to say," lamented Mister Chihuahua, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Monkey, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the gulch when we get a lot of Dalmatians greasing clothespins?"

"I can't imagine," wondered Mister Chihuahua.

"What are we going to do about it?" chortled Mrs. Monkey.

"Appoint a committee?" burbled Mister Chihuahua, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Monkey had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Monkey sternly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," yammered Mister Chihuahua daintily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Monkey openly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," pronounced Mister Chihuahua gingerly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the bookshelf on his front porch, looking out over the gulch and getting upset. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Monkey. Do come again."

"Just a minute," roared Mrs. Monkey positively. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Chihuahua thought he had answered, and was beginning to get agile. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Monkey doing these days?"

Mrs. Monkey would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Chihuahua sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied properly.