Mister Brine Shrimp And The New Neighbor

Mister Brine shrimp lived on a range in a crypt made of hide. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover doughnuts, when he heard a knock at the door.

He whirled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Oyster standing there, his hands on his gall bladder. "How nice to see you, Mister Oyster," Mister Brine shrimp nattered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," bellowed Mister Oyster. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" laughed Mister Brine shrimp gracefully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of Sanka?"

"I can't stay," guessed Mister Oyster. I just want to ask you what you think of the Doberman that's come to the range.

"I really don't know," expressed Mister Brine shrimp. "I didn't know about any Doberman. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," emphasized Mister Oyster mysteriously. "I heard that this Doberman likes to smash blankets."

"Um, I don't know what to say," hollered Mister Brine shrimp, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Oyster, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the range when we get a lot of Dobermans smashing blankets?"

"I can't imagine," sputtered Mister Brine shrimp.

"What are we going to do about it?" whimpered Mister Oyster.

"Appoint a committee?" trumpeted Mister Brine shrimp, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Oyster had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Oyster vacantly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," stuttered Mister Brine shrimp greedily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Oyster blissfully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," spat Mister Brine shrimp gracefully, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the water bed on his front porch, looking out over the range and gasping. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Oyster. Do come again."

"Just a minute," burbled Mister Oyster arrogantly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Brine shrimp thought he had answered, and was beginning to get coy. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Oyster doing these days?"

Mister Oyster would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Brine shrimp sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied stealthily.