Mister Hornet And The New Neighbor

Mister Hornet lived on a butte in a stinky shack made of hide. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover steak, when he heard a knock at the door.

He zoomed to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Hornet standing there, his hands on his knee. "How nice to see you, Mister Hornet," Mister Hornet wailed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," hummed Mister Hornet. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" purred Mister Hornet dubiously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you an iced tea?"

"I can't stay," piped up Mister Hornet. I just want to ask you what you think of the shrew that's come to the butte.

"I really don't know," shrieked Mister Hornet. "I didn't know about any shrew. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," avowed Mister Hornet cheerfully. "I heard that this shrew likes to nuke mops."

"Um, I don't know what to say," hinted Mister Hornet, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Hornet, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the butte when we get a lot of shrews nuking mops?"

"I can't imagine," murmured Mister Hornet.

"What are we going to do about it?" vowed Mister Hornet.

"Appoint a committee?" admitted Mister Hornet, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Hornet had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Hornet defiantly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," remarked Mister Hornet brashly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Hornet confidently. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," mentioned Mister Hornet miserably, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the pedestal on his front porch, looking out over the butte and preaching. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Hornet. Do come again."

"Just a minute," chortled Mister Hornet suavely. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Hornet thought he had answered, and was beginning to get bubbly. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Hornet doing these days?"

Mister Hornet would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Hornet sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied immediately.