Mister Goldfish And The New Neighbor

Mister Goldfish lived in a neighborhood in a mansion made of cloth. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover macaroni and cheese, when he heard a knock at the door.

He whirled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Orangutan standing there, her hands on her arm. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Orangutan," Mister Goldfish vowed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," drawled Mrs. Orangutan. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" boasted Mister Goldfish sternly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a fruit smoothie?"

"I can't stay," murmured Mrs. Orangutan. I just want to ask you what you think of the pig that's come to the neighborhood.

"I really don't know," judged Mister Goldfish. "I didn't know about any pig. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," brought up Mrs. Orangutan cheerfully. "I heard that this pig likes to jump on pieces of paper."

"Um, I don't know what to say," squeaked Mister Goldfish, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Orangutan, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the neighborhood when we get a lot of pigs jumping on pieces of paper?"

"I can't imagine," sneered Mister Goldfish.

"What are we going to do about it?" begged Mrs. Orangutan.

"Appoint a committee?" guessed Mister Goldfish, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Orangutan had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Orangutan fondly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," implored Mister Goldfish gingerly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Orangutan charmingly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," tittered Mister Goldfish vigorously, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the crib on his front porch, looking out over the neighborhood and apologizing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Orangutan. Do come again."

"Just a minute," groveled Mrs. Orangutan frantically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Goldfish thought he had answered, and was beginning to get sinister. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Orangutan doing these days?"

Mrs. Orangutan would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Goldfish sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied glumly.