Mister Eagle And The New Neighbor

Mister Eagle lived on a mountaintop in a hotel made of yarn. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover moo goo gai pan, when he heard a knock at the door.

He capered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Flea standing there, her hands on her hairdo. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Flea," Mister Eagle squawked, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," commented Mrs. Flea. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" spewed Mister Eagle ingeniously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a chocolate milk?"

"I can't stay," grunted Mrs. Flea. I just want to ask you what you think of the ass that's come to the mountaintop.

"I really don't know," gabbed Mister Eagle. "I didn't know about any ass. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," intoned Mrs. Flea uneasily. "I heard that this ass likes to pulverize purses."

"Um, I don't know what to say," wept Mister Eagle, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Flea, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the mountaintop when we get a lot of asses pulverizing purses?"

"I can't imagine," stuttered Mister Eagle.

"What are we going to do about it?" articulated Mrs. Flea.

"Appoint a committee?" questioned Mister Eagle, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Flea had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Flea languidly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," scoffed Mister Eagle wildly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Flea nervously. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," joked Mister Eagle hungrily, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the floor on his front porch, looking out over the mountaintop and meowing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Flea. Do come again."

"Just a minute," said Mrs. Flea grandly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Eagle thought he had answered, and was beginning to get wicked. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Flea doing these days?"

Mrs. Flea would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Eagle sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied tearfully.