Mister Mountain Goat And The New Neighbor

Mister Mountain goat lived on a grassy knoll in a manor house made of taffy. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover chicken gumbo, when he heard a knock at the door.

He capered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Snipe standing there, his hands on his hair. "How nice to see you, Mister Snipe," Mister Mountain goat spat, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," gabbed Mister Snipe. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" lectured Mister Mountain goat pitifully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Dr. Pepper?"

"I can't stay," nattered Mister Snipe. I just want to ask you what you think of the lemur that's come to the grassy knoll.

"I really don't know," comforted Mister Mountain goat. "I didn't know about any lemur. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," groaned Mister Snipe hungrily. "I heard that this lemur likes to unbutton iPhones."

"Um, I don't know what to say," rumored Mister Mountain goat, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Snipe, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the grassy knoll when we get a lot of lemurs unbuttoning iPhones?"

"I can't imagine," amended Mister Mountain goat.

"What are we going to do about it?" murmured Mister Snipe.

"Appoint a committee?" murmured Mister Mountain goat, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Snipe had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Snipe softly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," urged Mister Mountain goat gratefully, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Snipe tenderly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," questioned Mister Mountain goat sarcastically, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the rug on his front porch, looking out over the grassy knoll and screeching. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Snipe. Do come again."

"Just a minute," imitated Mister Snipe fearlessly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Mountain goat thought he had answered, and was beginning to get passionate. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Snipe doing these days?"

Mister Snipe would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Mountain goat sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied gingerly.