Miss Duck-billed Platypus And The New Neighbor

Miss Duck-billed platypus lived on a peninsula in a junk car made of canvas. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover macaroni and cheese, when she heard a knock at the door.

She staggered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Antelope standing there, his hands on his palm. "How nice to see you, Mister Antelope," Miss Duck-billed platypus cackled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," added Mister Antelope. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" cackled Miss Duck-billed platypus gingerly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of water?"

"I can't stay," wept Mister Antelope. I just want to ask you what you think of the mare that's come to the peninsula.

"I really don't know," demanded Miss Duck-billed platypus. "I didn't know about any mare. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," shrieked Mister Antelope swiftly. "I heard that this mare likes to slash staplers."

"Um, I don't know what to say," stammered Miss Duck-billed platypus, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Antelope, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the peninsula when we get a lot of mares slashing staplers?"

"I can't imagine," intimated Miss Duck-billed platypus.

"What are we going to do about it?" proposed Mister Antelope.

"Appoint a committee?" asserted Miss Duck-billed platypus, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Antelope had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Antelope crossly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," whimpered Miss Duck-billed platypus solemnly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Antelope gleefully. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," squawked Miss Duck-billed platypus lightly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the carpet on her front porch, looking out over the peninsula and grumbling. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Antelope. Do come again."

"Just a minute," wondered Mister Antelope sympathetically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Duck-billed platypus thought she had answered, and was beginning to get merry. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Antelope doing these days?"

Mister Antelope would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Duck-billed platypus sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied lazily.