Mister Rattlesnake And The New Neighbor

Mister Rattlesnake lived in a gulch in a yurt made of cow pies. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover beans, when he heard a knock at the door.

He slid to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Ladybug standing there, his hands on his pinky. "How nice to see you, Mister Ladybug," Mister Rattlesnake urged, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," jeered Mister Ladybug. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" sneered Mister Rattlesnake cautiously, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a 7-Up?"

"I can't stay," worried Mister Ladybug. I just want to ask you what you think of the gazelle that's come to the gulch.

"I really don't know," admitted Mister Rattlesnake. "I didn't know about any gazelle. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," agreed Mister Ladybug daringly. "I heard that this gazelle likes to bake hip flasks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," howled Mister Rattlesnake, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Ladybug, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the gulch when we get a lot of gazelles baking hip flasks?"

"I can't imagine," alleged Mister Rattlesnake.

"What are we going to do about it?" panted Mister Ladybug.

"Appoint a committee?" chanted Mister Rattlesnake, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Ladybug had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Ladybug diligently. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," whispered Mister Rattlesnake flightily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Ladybug hysterically. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," uttered Mister Rattlesnake numbly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the pedestal on his front porch, looking out over the gulch and getting rigid. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Ladybug. Do come again."

"Just a minute," invited Mister Ladybug energetically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Rattlesnake thought he had answered, and was beginning to get muscular. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Ladybug doing these days?"

Mister Ladybug would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Rattlesnake sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied obediently.