Miss Groundhog And The New Neighbor

Miss Groundhog lived on a butte in a house made of granite. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover clam chowder, when she heard a knock at the door.

She rolled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Poodle standing there, his hands on his skin. "How nice to see you, Mister Poodle," Miss Groundhog invited, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," remarked Mister Poodle. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" added Miss Groundhog uselessly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a Tom Collins?"

"I can't stay," questioned Mister Poodle. I just want to ask you what you think of the sasquatch that's come to the butte.

"I really don't know," opined Miss Groundhog. "I didn't know about any sasquatch. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," lamented Mister Poodle deliberately. "I heard that this sasquatch likes to lynch handkerchiefs."

"Um, I don't know what to say," stated Miss Groundhog, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Poodle, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the butte when we get a lot of sasquatches lynching handkerchiefs?"

"I can't imagine," breathed Miss Groundhog.

"What are we going to do about it?" revealed Mister Poodle.

"Appoint a committee?" warbled Miss Groundhog, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Poodle had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Poodle ignobly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," voiced Miss Groundhog immediately, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Poodle offhandedly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," belched Miss Groundhog carelessly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the stool on her front porch, looking out over the butte and grunting. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Poodle. Do come again."

"Just a minute," nattered Mister Poodle resignedly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Groundhog thought she had answered, and was beginning to get direct. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Poodle doing these days?"

Mister Poodle would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Groundhog sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied numbly.