Miss Spider And The New Neighbor

Miss Spider lived in a circus tent in a mud hut made of foil. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover roast turkey, when she heard a knock at the door.

She danced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mister Anteater standing there, his hands on his knuckle. "How nice to see you, Mister Anteater," Miss Spider screamed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," orated Mister Anteater. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" bragged Miss Spider bravely, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of whiskey?"

"I can't stay," prattled Mister Anteater. I just want to ask you what you think of the banana slug that's come to the circus tent.

"I really don't know," smiled Miss Spider. "I didn't know about any banana slug. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," chattered Mister Anteater fiercely. "I heard that this banana slug likes to brush doilies."

"Um, I don't know what to say," spouted Miss Spider, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Anteater, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the circus tent when we get a lot of banana slugs brushing doilies?"

"I can't imagine," concluded Miss Spider.

"What are we going to do about it?" sniffed Mister Anteater.

"Appoint a committee?" grieved Miss Spider, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Anteater had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Anteater despondently. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," imitated Miss Spider trustingly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Anteater nonchalantly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," winked Miss Spider gracefully, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the overstuffed chair on her front porch, looking out over the circus tent and waking up. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Anteater. Do come again."

"Just a minute," cajoled Mister Anteater intensely. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Spider thought she had answered, and was beginning to get smart. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Anteater doing these days?"

Mister Anteater would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Spider sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied zestily.