Miss Chihuahua And The New Neighbor

Miss Chihuahua lived on a veld in a Cape Cod made of plywood. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover succotash, when she heard a knock at the door.

She strode to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Phantom standing there, her hands on her antenna. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Phantom," Miss Chihuahua shouted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," peeped Mrs. Phantom. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" spouted Miss Chihuahua greedily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of tea?"

"I can't stay," spat Mrs. Phantom. I just want to ask you what you think of the gopher that's come to the veld.

"I really don't know," asked Miss Chihuahua. "I didn't know about any gopher. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," announced Mrs. Phantom defiantly. "I heard that this gopher likes to experience stopwatches."

"Um, I don't know what to say," fantasized Miss Chihuahua, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Phantom, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the veld when we get a lot of gophers experiencing stopwatches?"

"I can't imagine," continued Miss Chihuahua.

"What are we going to do about it?" divulged Mrs. Phantom.

"Appoint a committee?" gabbed Miss Chihuahua, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Phantom had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Phantom busily. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," croaked Miss Chihuahua narrowly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Phantom cruelly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," pronounced Miss Chihuahua miserably, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the ping-pong table on her front porch, looking out over the veld and awakening. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Phantom. Do come again."

"Just a minute," fretted Mrs. Phantom impatiently. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Chihuahua thought she had answered, and was beginning to get beautiful. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Phantom doing these days?"

Mrs. Phantom would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Chihuahua sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied again.