Mister Eagle And The New Neighbor

Mister Eagle lived in a lagoon in a sand castle made of reeds. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover duck a l'orange, when he heard a knock at the door.

He barrelled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Iguana standing there, her hands on her eyelid. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Iguana," Mister Eagle spewed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," laughed Mrs. Iguana. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" questioned Mister Eagle properly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a kamikaze?"

"I can't stay," howled Mrs. Iguana. I just want to ask you what you think of the beagle that's come to the lagoon.

"I really don't know," muttered Mister Eagle. "I didn't know about any beagle. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," whimpered Mrs. Iguana coldly. "I heard that this beagle likes to rotate fishing poles."

"Um, I don't know what to say," recited Mister Eagle, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Iguana, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the lagoon when we get a lot of beagles rotating fishing poles?"

"I can't imagine," blustered Mister Eagle.

"What are we going to do about it?" prattled Mrs. Iguana.

"Appoint a committee?" fretted Mister Eagle, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Iguana had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Iguana carefully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," swore Mister Eagle softly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Iguana briskly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," amended Mister Eagle happily, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the hope chest on his front porch, looking out over the lagoon and wincing. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Iguana. Do come again."

"Just a minute," moaned Mrs. Iguana gingerly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Eagle thought he had answered, and was beginning to get stinky. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Iguana doing these days?"

Mrs. Iguana would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Eagle sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied victoriously.