Mister Hamster And The New Neighbor

Mister Hamster lived on a hillside in a box made of logs. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover hamburgers, when he heard a knock at the door.

He tramped to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Sheep standing there, his hands on his wrist. "How nice to see you, Mister Sheep," Mister Hamster prattled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," amended Mister Sheep. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" reacted Mister Hamster gracefully, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a gin and tonic?"

"I can't stay," boasted Mister Sheep. I just want to ask you what you think of the bandicoot that's come to the hillside.

"I really don't know," added Mister Hamster. "I didn't know about any bandicoot. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," winked Mister Sheep busily. "I heard that this bandicoot likes to unwrap advertisements."

"Um, I don't know what to say," implored Mister Hamster, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Sheep, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the hillside when we get a lot of bandicoots unwrapping advertisements?"

"I can't imagine," disputed Mister Hamster.

"What are we going to do about it?" repeated Mister Sheep.

"Appoint a committee?" pronounced Mister Hamster, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Sheep had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Sheep anxiously. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," complained Mister Hamster lightly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Sheep coldly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," wailed Mister Hamster gracefully, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the four-poster bed on his front porch, looking out over the hillside and calculating. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Sheep. Do come again."

"Just a minute," barked Mister Sheep kindly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Hamster thought he had answered, and was beginning to get conscientious. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Sheep doing these days?"

Mister Sheep would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Hamster sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied irritably.