Miss Rhinoceros And The New Neighbor

Miss Rhinoceros lived on a hillside in a cabin made of cane. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover roast turkey, when she heard a knock at the door.

She lumbered to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Cockroach standing there, her hands on her thumb. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Cockroach," Miss Rhinoceros avowed, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," indicated Mrs. Cockroach. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" wailed Miss Rhinoceros clumsily, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of carrot juice?"

"I can't stay," blathered Mrs. Cockroach. I just want to ask you what you think of the opossum that's come to the hillside.

"I really don't know," harangued Miss Rhinoceros. "I didn't know about any opossum. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," blurted Mrs. Cockroach firmly. "I heard that this opossum likes to banish playing cards."

"Um, I don't know what to say," implored Miss Rhinoceros, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Cockroach, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the hillside when we get a lot of opossums banishing playing cards?"

"I can't imagine," harangued Miss Rhinoceros.

"What are we going to do about it?" intimated Mrs. Cockroach.

"Appoint a committee?" judged Miss Rhinoceros, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Cockroach had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Cockroach thankfully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," fantasized Miss Rhinoceros woefully, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Cockroach sleepily. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," realized Miss Rhinoceros stupidly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the table on her front porch, looking out over the hillside and snorting. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Cockroach. Do come again."

"Just a minute," harangued Mrs. Cockroach diligently. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Rhinoceros thought she had answered, and was beginning to get dowdy. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Cockroach doing these days?"

Mrs. Cockroach would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Rhinoceros sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied dreamily.