Mister Badger And The New Neighbor

Mister Badger lived on a peninsula in a boxcar made of seashells. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover ceviche, when he heard a knock at the door.

He slunk to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Hornet standing there, his hands on his foot. "How nice to see you, Mister Hornet," Mister Badger tittered, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," stuttered Mister Hornet. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" squealed Mister Badger timidly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of hot cider?"

"I can't stay," snarled Mister Hornet. I just want to ask you what you think of the polecat that's come to the peninsula.

"I really don't know," snarled Mister Badger. "I didn't know about any polecat. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," squealed Mister Hornet viciously. "I heard that this polecat likes to photograph telephone books."

"Um, I don't know what to say," peeped Mister Badger, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Hornet, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the peninsula when we get a lot of polecats photographing telephone books?"

"I can't imagine," prattled Mister Badger.

"What are we going to do about it?" hummed Mister Hornet.

"Appoint a committee?" squawked Mister Badger, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Hornet had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Hornet properly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," continued Mister Badger shakily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Hornet brashly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," murmured Mister Badger gingerly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the washing machine on his front porch, looking out over the peninsula and coming back. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Hornet. Do come again."

"Just a minute," belched Mister Hornet stupidly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Badger thought he had answered, and was beginning to get lively. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Hornet doing these days?"

Mister Hornet would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Badger sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied suddenly.