Miss Peacock And The New Neighbor

Miss Peacock lived on a peninsula in a trough made of seaweed. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover roast Cornish game hen, when she heard a knock at the door.

She ran to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Groundhog standing there, her hands on her thyroid gland. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Groundhog," Miss Peacock panted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," smirked Mrs. Groundhog. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" burbled Miss Peacock confidently, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a shot of bourbon?"

"I can't stay," railed Mrs. Groundhog. I just want to ask you what you think of the mountain goat that's come to the peninsula.

"I really don't know," joked Miss Peacock. "I didn't know about any mountain goat. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," argued Mrs. Groundhog awkwardly. "I heard that this mountain goat likes to probe pens."

"Um, I don't know what to say," blubbered Miss Peacock, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Groundhog, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the peninsula when we get a lot of mountain goats probing pens?"

"I can't imagine," comforted Miss Peacock.

"What are we going to do about it?" murmured Mrs. Groundhog.

"Appoint a committee?" urged Miss Peacock, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Groundhog had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Groundhog timidly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," commented Miss Peacock viciously, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Groundhog tenderly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," chortled Miss Peacock gently, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the hammock on her front porch, looking out over the peninsula and suffering. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Groundhog. Do come again."

"Just a minute," affirmed Mrs. Groundhog gratefully. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Peacock thought she had answered, and was beginning to get polite. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Groundhog doing these days?"

Mrs. Groundhog would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Peacock sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied shyly.