Mister Canary And The New Neighbor

Mister Canary lived on a plain in a penthouse made of hair. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover hamburgers, when he heard a knock at the door.

He made a beeline to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Pony standing there, her hands on her fingernail. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Pony," Mister Canary emphasized, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," belched Mrs. Pony. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" nattered Mister Canary fervently, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a piña colada?"

"I can't stay," wept Mrs. Pony. I just want to ask you what you think of the turtle that's come to the plain.

"I really don't know," bawled Mister Canary. "I didn't know about any turtle. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," chimed Mrs. Pony sternly. "I heard that this turtle likes to face spoons."

"Um, I don't know what to say," continued Mister Canary, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Pony, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the plain when we get a lot of turtles facing spoons?"

"I can't imagine," exploded Mister Canary.

"What are we going to do about it?" groveled Mrs. Pony.

"Appoint a committee?" persisted Mister Canary, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Pony had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Pony thoughtfully. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," warbled Mister Canary sorrowfully, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Pony fearlessly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," growled Mister Canary coldly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the wooden crate on his front porch, looking out over the plain and cheering up. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Pony. Do come again."

"Just a minute," gasped Mrs. Pony excitedly. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Canary thought he had answered, and was beginning to get awkward. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Pony doing these days?"

Mrs. Pony would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Canary sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied boisterously.