Miss Doggie And The New Neighbor

Miss Doggie lived at a crime scene in a travel trailer made of recycled newspaper. One morning, she had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover potatoes and gravy, when she heard a knock at the door.

She struggled to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

She was surprised to see Mrs. Chimpanzee standing there, her hands on her kneecap. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Chimpanzee," Miss Doggie panted, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," smiled Mrs. Chimpanzee. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" exploded Miss Doggie cunningly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of milk?"

"I can't stay," whispered Mrs. Chimpanzee. I just want to ask you what you think of the worm that's come to the crime scene.

"I really don't know," comforted Miss Doggie. "I didn't know about any worm. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," crooned Mrs. Chimpanzee fiercely. "I heard that this worm likes to leave yardsticks."

"Um, I don't know what to say," sobbed Miss Doggie, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Chimpanzee, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the crime scene when we get a lot of worms leaving yardsticks?"

"I can't imagine," breathed Miss Doggie.

"What are we going to do about it?" pronounced Mrs. Chimpanzee.

"Appoint a committee?" sobbed Miss Doggie, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Chimpanzee had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Chimpanzee fearlessly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," squealed Miss Doggie happily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding herself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Chimpanzee nimbly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," groveled Miss Doggie roughly, thinking of all the time she'd prefer to be sitting on the cash register on her front porch, looking out over the crime scene and sweating. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Chimpanzee. Do come again."

"Just a minute," orated Mrs. Chimpanzee frantically. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Miss Doggie thought she had answered, and was beginning to get emotional. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Chimpanzee doing these days?"

Mrs. Chimpanzee would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Miss Doggie sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," she replied angrily.