Mister Pigeon And The New Neighbor

Mister Pigeon lived on a steppe in a convent made of plaster of Paris. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover pancakes, when he heard a knock at the door.

He bounded to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mrs. Deer standing there, her hands on her spine. "How nice to see you, Mrs. Deer," Mister Pigeon groveled, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," belched Mrs. Deer. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" guessed Mister Pigeon intensely, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a cup of eggnog?"

"I can't stay," inquired Mrs. Deer. I just want to ask you what you think of the gorilla that's come to the steppe.

"I really don't know," belched Mister Pigeon. "I didn't know about any gorilla. I'm sure he is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," vouched Mrs. Deer gingerly. "I heard that this gorilla likes to pound arrowheads."

"Um, I don't know what to say," enunciated Mister Pigeon, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mrs. Deer, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the steppe when we get a lot of gorillas pounding arrowheads?"

"I can't imagine," intoned Mister Pigeon.

"What are we going to do about it?" cajoled Mrs. Deer.

"Appoint a committee?" bawled Mister Pigeon, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mrs. Deer had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mrs. Deer admiringly. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," brought up Mister Pigeon pityingly, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mrs. Deer brashly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," guessed Mister Pigeon reluctantly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the futon on his front porch, looking out over the steppe and watching. "It's been nice talking to you, Mrs. Deer. Do come again."

"Just a minute," mouthed Mrs. Deer flightily. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Pigeon thought he had answered, and was beginning to get undignified. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mister Deer doing these days?"

Mrs. Deer would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Pigeon sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied slowly.