Mister Jaguar And The New Neighbor

Mister Jaguar lived on a path in a geodesic dome made of rope. One morning, he had just finished breakfast and was putting away the leftover fondue, when he heard a knock at the door.

He pranced to the door, wondering who would be stopping for a visit at this time of day.

He was surprised to see Mister Ape standing there, his hands on his palm. "How nice to see you, Mister Ape," Mister Jaguar voiced, not at all sure it was indeed nice. "The pleasure's all yours, I'm sure," howled Mister Ape. "May I come in?"

"Oh, I'm forgetting my manners!" blubbered Mister Jaguar defiantly, opening the door wide. "Please come in. Can I get you a glass of lemonade?"

"I can't stay," gabbed Mister Ape. I just want to ask you what you think of the weasel that's come to the path.

"I really don't know," declaimed Mister Jaguar. "I didn't know about any weasel. I'm sure she is very nice."

"Well don't be so sure," voiced Mister Ape cleverly. "I heard that this weasel likes to shoot footballs."

"Um, I don't know what to say," answered Mister Jaguar, who really didn't know what to say.

"Well I do," said Mister Ape, who always seemed to know what to say. "What do you think is going to happen to the path when we get a lot of weasels shooting footballs?"

"I can't imagine," avowed Mister Jaguar.

"What are we going to do about it?" interrupted Mister Ape.

"Appoint a committee?" roared Mister Jaguar, who was pretty sure a committee was what Mister Ape had in mind.

"That's exactly right," said Mister Ape violently. "A committee to study the problem."

"Well that's a fine idea," indicated Mister Jaguar merrily, who wanted to bring the conversation to a close quickly, without finding himself on this committee.

"I'd like for you to be on the committee," said Mister Ape crossly. "You always have such good ideas."

"Oh, I don't think I'd have time for that," sneered Mister Jaguar vacantly, thinking of all the time he'd prefer to be sitting on the TV on his front porch, looking out over the path and squinting. "It's been nice talking to you, Mister Ape. Do come again."

"Just a minute," retorted Mister Ape again. "You didn't answer about the committee."

Mister Jaguar thought he had answered, and was beginning to get homely. "Thank you so much for thinking of me. It is a lovely day, isn't it? How is Mrs. Ape doing these days?"

Mister Ape would have none of it. "So, let's meet at your house, say tomorrow at two?"

Mister Jaguar sighed. "Tomorrow at two it is," he replied surreptitiously.