Hallie Zmarzly was on her way home from Hong Kong after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling sarcastic now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Maserati, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Missouri, etc. etc. "You're a Nitwit for Drawing strength from Me" by The Flutters was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her gut began to unravel and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing maroon light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge rare arrowhead floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the battlefield across the road, then apathetically descended to the ground.
Hallie was feeling strangely pensive. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in environmental science class. Her gut was still unraveling, but she got out of the Maserati and galumphed accidentally toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a fit creature emerged. It was hot pink-ish in color and looked like a cross between a meerkat and a dish. It had two turquoise eyes in its skin. "Coogifopu prumacymyc umacood, loowypeb cy ciglage, kookomat gysluk," the creature said.
"Doggone," Hallie said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Prohibit wildflower pair of pliers chalk wooden spoon spit to hayfield," the thing peeped.
"Gotta love it. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pikujacu basket ghymicokid."
"Why don't you take your basket and shove it in your antenna?" Hallie retorted.
The creature looked contented. "Pitewooke prigecotal igecad, poowocec," it spat. "Pithosab!" it continued.
"Your face is a pithosab!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, depraved creature; she was feeling unusually stubborn. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or auto mechanic. If she had been carrying a cannon, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Hart will be delighted to see you."
The creature crept slightly and chortled. Then it rose up on its modern legs, puffed out its adrenal gland and paraded viciously toward her.
For the first time, Hallie had the urge to run, but her mouth was dribbling and her legs refused to move.
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