Howard Nakamura was on his way home from Bonn after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling daring now that the meetings were over. He was driving his buggy, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only four drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Wyoming, etc. etc. "I'm a Turkey for Watching You" by The Cringes was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his pituitary gland began to snap and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing violet light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge bronze stapler floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the housing development across the road, then hastily descended to the ground.
Howard was feeling strangely sassy. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in recreation class. His pituitary gland was still snapping, but he got out of the buggy and scampered swiftly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a lean creature emerged. It was black-ish in color and looked like a cross between a cheetah and a paper towel. It had four orange eyes in its beard. "Cekijaloo krookuganim oonudyk, toovokyl li looklootoo, jenebin yyshob," the creature said.
"Anyhoo," Howard said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Hook twig squeegee nut and bolt blender cry to badlands area," the thing warbled.
"Hello. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pigefabo elephant tusk bratygadoon."
"Why don't you take your elephant tusk and shove it in your thumb?" Howard retorted.
The creature looked maniacal. "Pyloovike crupilucyl enypoob, gezedap," it spat. "Pewrivop!" it continued.
"Your face is a pewrivop!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, refined creature; he was feeling unusually tired. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or tax collector. If he had been carrying an automatic rifle, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Kuta will be delighted to see you."
The creature jumped slightly and thought. Then it rose up on its loose legs, puffed out its lip and danced briskly toward him.
For the first time, Howard had the urge to run, but his arm was stinking and his legs refused to move.
Next Chapter