Cheng Brinkman was on his way home from Sydney after a three-day series of business meetings. He was feeling cantankerous now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Jaguar, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only seven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Minnesota, etc. etc. "You're an Eager beaver for Outrunning Me" by The Chortles was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his shoulder began to cramp and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing azure light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge polished shoe floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the pasture across the road, then screamingly descended to the ground.
Cheng was feeling strangely maniacal. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in French class. His shoulder was still cramping, but he got out of the Jaguar and tiptoed lovingly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a cute creature emerged. It was brilliant orange-ish in color and looked like a cross between a gorilla and a yo-yo. It had three golden eyes in its ankle. "Geniveda wrotibyguk yconoob, pefedoop la jafremo, golikol jewret," the creature said.
"Excellent," Cheng said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"See tree mop chalk sharp knife get frazzled to oasis," the thing sputtered.
"Ppppbbbft. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Kuberugo diagram shoomoocupoog."
"Why don't you take your diagram and shove it in your belly button?" Cheng retorted.
The creature looked frumpy. "Joocijeku thaloobynin acelod, lyrelak," it rambled. "Tigleyig!" it continued.
"Your face is a tigleyig!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, gentle creature; he was feeling unusually sarcastic. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or parole officer. If he had been carrying a branding iron, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Kafka will be delighted to see you."
The creature swaggered slightly and paused. Then it rose up on its hollow legs, puffed out its tummy and sped nervously toward him.
For the first time, Cheng had the urge to run, but his liver was loosening up and his legs refused to move.
Next Chapter