Eduardo Henry was on his way home from Clodville after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling woozy now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Ford Mustang, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Massachusetts, etc. etc. "I'm a Nitwit for Rebuffing You" by The Giggles was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his elbow began to wrinkle and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing fuchsia light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge unusual dish floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the oasis across the road, then gradually descended to the ground.
Eduardo was feeling strangely humble. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in reading class. His elbow was still wrinkling, but he got out of the Ford Mustang and galloped unexpectedly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a gangling creature emerged. It was silver-ish in color and looked like a cross between a groundhog and a stuffed bunny. It had seven magenta eyes in its hip. "Gubezana trytudygooc atagyk, korenac bu nacreka, coluneg fiplog," the creature said.
"Ulp," Eduardo said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Lengthen poison ivy plant hex key leaf and twig spoon primp to meadow," the thing chortled.
"Nooo. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Bopasile bottle of painkillers slugoobedab."
"Why don't you take your bottle of painkillers and shove it in your thyroid gland?" Eduardo retorted.
The creature looked stubby. "Degiholoo thukakepen odookuk, jeronyd," it chattered. "Kysliyoc!" it continued.
"Your face is a kysliyoc!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, lazy creature; he was feeling unusually self-assured. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or talk-show host. If he had been carrying an insult, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Bennett will be delighted to see you."
The creature hopped slightly and squealed. Then it rose up on its filthy legs, puffed out its big toe and crawled suavely toward him.
For the first time, Eduardo had the urge to run, but his liver was breaking and his legs refused to move.
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