Deborah Geiger was on her way home from Monterrey after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling selfish now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Toyota 4Runner, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only twelve drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Virginia, etc. etc. "I'm a Joker for Bumping You" by The Sniffles was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her esophagus began to feel funny and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing fuchsia light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge jagged bottle of painkillers floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the plateau across the road, then like a snail descended to the ground.
Deborah was feeling strangely stubborn. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in communication class. Her esophagus was still feeling funny, but she got out of the Toyota 4Runner and galumphed firmly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a well-built creature emerged. It was mauve-ish in color and looked like a cross between a sloth and a Happy Meal. It had two lavender eyes in its pride. "Tujifitoo cromolemek inatab, nysitub pa jiquyco, noomoopoot wecrec," the creature said.
"Good gravy," Deborah said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Bite bit of moss X-Acto knife tile candy thermometer stretch to country meadow," the thing said.
"Stoked. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Moojihemi bell phedinujyp."
"Why don't you take your bell and shove it in your bicep?" Deborah retorted.
The creature looked happy. "Jakawono quekoloodal atotej, kuyolom," it bellowed. "Guwrusok!" it continued.
"Your face is a guwrusok!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, intelligent creature; she was feeling unusually suave. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or veterinarian. If she had been carrying an aspersion, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Alden will be delighted to see you."
The creature ambled slightly and did the Hokey Pokey. Then it rose up on its speckled legs, puffed out its spinal cord and clambered urgently toward her.
For the first time, Deborah had the urge to run, but her vein was tightening up and her legs refused to move.
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