Lindsay MacKenzie was on her way home from Perth Amboy after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling puzzled now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Ferrari, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of New Hampshire, etc. etc. "You're a She-wolf for Stumping Me" by The Hiccups was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her hip began to turn green and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing purple light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge original button floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the park across the road, then rapidly descended to the ground.
Lindsay was feeling strangely desperate. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in Bangladeshian history class. Her hip was still turning green, but she got out of the Ferrari and walked warmly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a beautiful creature emerged. It was azure-ish in color and looked like a cross between an eel and a chart. It had five lime-green eyes in its scalp. "Bukehugi shicudemod ypunuc, cevoogook coo lewrope, jejujad hofloot," the creature said.
"Ay caramba," Lindsay said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Crack fish hair dryer buffalo hide pair of chopsticks rock to stream," the thing announced.
"Harrumph. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Mutyjaju pipe brunecooguk."
"Why don't you take your pipe and shove it in your dignity?" Lindsay retorted.
The creature looked brave. "Jejoovine wrunelunam egakyj, cevobok," it decided. "Beslysyd!" it continued.
"Your face is a beslysyd!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, polite creature; she was feeling unusually drowsy. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or pair of scissors salesman. If she had been carrying a pistol, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Hoffa will be delighted to see you."
The creature skidded slightly and curtseyed. Then it rose up on its queer legs, puffed out its belly button and sped dubiously toward her.
For the first time, Lindsay had the urge to run, but her eye was aggravating and her legs refused to move.
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