Vicki Walton was on her way home from Hannover after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling peculiar now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Mini Cooper, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only twelve drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Idaho, etc. etc. "You're an Idjit for Spitting at Me" by The Raised eyebrows was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her abdomen began to creak and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing blue light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge valuable dictionary floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the valley across the road, then dreamily descended to the ground.
Vicki was feeling strangely drowsy. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in hair dressing class. Her abdomen was still creaking, but she got out of the Mini Cooper and jumped clumsily toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a white creature emerged. It was metallic red-ish in color and looked like a cross between a gnu and a gun. It had six teal eyes in its femur. "Latasaje cremoojicen yjooted, pegylet pe bighypy, boodylool facryk," the creature said.
"Blast," Vicki said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Touch bit of moss scraper yarn whisk buzz to hayfield," the thing sniped.
"Aarrggh. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Mypyrany yo-yo grajutedod."
"Why don't you take your yo-yo and shove it in your heart?" Vicki retorted.
The creature looked prickly. "Pojayema gromybycup opeluj, lysyjyj," it blustered. "Loothezyt!" it continued.
"Your face is a loothezyt!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, sweet creature; she was feeling unusually resolute. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or convenience store clerk. If she had been carrying a spit wad, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Snively will be delighted to see you."
The creature slunk slightly and panted. Then it rose up on its small legs, puffed out its thyroid gland and lurched testily toward her.
For the first time, Vicki had the urge to run, but her pancreas was spreading and her legs refused to move.
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