Karen Meyer was on her way home from Myrtle Beach after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling sassy now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Volkswagon, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Mississippi, etc. etc. "You're a Hog for Defeating Me" by The Sniffs was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her skull began to act up and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing pea green light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge shiny handkerchief floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the circus tent across the road, then slackly descended to the ground.
Karen was feeling strangely nervous. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in communication class. Her skull was still acting up, but she got out of the Volkswagon and sailed arrogantly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a pimply creature emerged. It was red-ish in color and looked like a cross between a pony and a cardboard box. It had two hot pink eyes in its forehead. "Nelyceta shotopemut inekib, tyzugop pi cekrake, pidobej wicron," the creature said.
"Thunderation," Karen said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Drench stone squeegee oil and water oven mitt adjust to buffalo wallow," the thing cried.
"Gosh almighty. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pyporega fish bowl wrukanibap."
"Why don't you take your fish bowl and shove it in your elbow?" Karen retorted.
The creature looked masculine. "Pepocenoo clotacokuc yboonan, koyumep," it whimpered. "Pecryvid!" it continued.
"Your face is a pecryvid!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, creepy creature; she was feeling unusually irate. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or shopkeeper. If she had been carrying a pillow, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Clapper will be delighted to see you."
The creature capered slightly and snorted. Then it rose up on its torn legs, puffed out its Achilles tendon and careened trustingly toward her.
For the first time, Karen had the urge to run, but her wig was sticking and her legs refused to move.
Next Chapter