Running Bear Nicholas was on his way home from Providence after a four-day series of business meetings. He was feeling self-assured now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Ford pickup, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Virgin Islands, etc. etc. "I'm a Culprit for Encouraging You" by The Gurgles was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his eyelid began to cramp and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing silver light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge sleek basketball floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the moonscape across the road, then nimbly descended to the ground.
Running Bear was feeling strangely frantic. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in constitutional law class. His eyelid was still cramping, but he got out of the Ford pickup and waddled suspiciously toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a spry creature emerged. It was indigo-ish in color and looked like a cross between a squirrel and an elephant tusk. It had three golden eyes in its palm. "Telewiboo grunapapyg agikom, behejood tu goklelo, cygokam yywhooj," the creature said.
"Dang," Running Bear said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Bite spring fingernail clipper nylon mixing spoon lie down to beach," the thing bawled.
"Bada bing bada boom. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pipoosumu coat check ticket kledakakic."
"Why don't you take your coat check ticket and shove it in your larynx?" Running Bear retorted.
The creature looked dismal. "Cumevyma trikigebac olydab, dezomook," it proposed. "Bawhihyn!" it continued.
"Your face is a bawhihyn!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, decisive creature; he was feeling unusually perky. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or bassoonist. If he had been carrying a spear, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Dotson will be delighted to see you."
The creature hobbled slightly and smiled. Then it rose up on its charming legs, puffed out its front tooth and sidled unexpectedly toward him.
For the first time, Running Bear had the urge to run, but his bicep was rotting and his legs refused to move.
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