Lorena Robinson was on her way home from Rapid City after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling frantic now that the meetings were over. She was driving her monster truck, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of North Dakota, etc. etc. "You're a Joker for Stalking Me" by The Cringes was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her chin began to soften and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing olive drab light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge ancient bugle floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the river across the road, then like mad descended to the ground.
Lorena was feeling strangely decisive. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in penmanship class. Her chin was still softening, but she got out of the monster truck and lurched again toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a petite creature emerged. It was lavender-ish in color and looked like a cross between a toad and a Bible. It had five navy blue eyes in its toe. "Mojoozekoo phamicedum ecugoom, noohagin ky jeshoci, cagomek zighem," the creature said.
"Hell's bells," Lorena said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Strip weed monkey wrench egg shell meat tenderizer howl to range," the thing groaned.
"Isht. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Kopyyipoo stuffed bunny shepybecoom."
"Why don't you take your stuffed bunny and shove it in your spine?" Lorena retorted.
The creature looked sanguine. "Cojuvagoo thutygacok eneman, doozejooj," it declaimed. "Tighucim!" it continued.
"Your face is a tighucim!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, spunky creature; she was feeling unusually carefree. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or dog trainer. If she had been carrying a pistol, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Zhang will be delighted to see you."
The creature leapt slightly and laughed. Then it rose up on its hand-made legs, puffed out its rib and slipped glibly toward her.
For the first time, Lorena had the urge to run, but her intestine was vexing and her legs refused to move.
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