Veronica Ferber was on her way home from Albuquerque after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling cunning now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Corvette, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eight drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Alabama, etc. etc. "You're a Buzzard for Correcting Me" by The Death glares was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her thumb began to hum and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing hot pink light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge disgusting stamp floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the prairie across the road, then like a bat out of hell descended to the ground.
Veronica was feeling strangely excitable. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in poetry class. Her thumb was still humming, but she got out of the Corvette and danced grandly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an eye-catching creature emerged. It was lime-green-ish in color and looked like a cross between a Chihuahua and a blank check. It had four terra cotta eyes in its eyelash. "Nelagadu chipamoomook aboonoc, peroomic la detrudi, dibojig cyquim," the creature said.
"Lo and behold," Veronica said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Pack mulberry tree axe felt pair of chopsticks slobber to circus tent," the thing quavered.
"Ultimate. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tikejoope lemon cledapineg."
"Why don't you take your lemon and shove it in your intestine?" Veronica retorted.
The creature looked mindless. "Cepyjami prootoogoomik ecoboon, lihucook," it rambled. "Cobroohat!" it continued.
"Your face is a cobroohat!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, adorable creature; she was feeling unusually cheerful. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or helicopter pilot. If she had been carrying a quick retort, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Kollmorgen will be delighted to see you."
The creature waltzed slightly and stared. Then it rose up on its decrepit legs, puffed out its knee and slid dolefully toward her.
For the first time, Veronica had the urge to run, but her spine was thickening and her legs refused to move.
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