Kitten Halperin was on her way home from Minneapolis after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling disagreeable now that the meetings were over. She was driving her MG convertible, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only three drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of New Mexico, etc. etc. "You're a Donkey for Trying to control Me" by The Glares was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her collarbone began to turn red and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing orange light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge brittle notepad floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the cliff across the road, then like a bat out of hell descended to the ground.
Kitten was feeling strangely ambitious. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in archaeology class. Her collarbone was still turning red, but she got out of the MG convertible and set out slyly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a feeble creature emerged. It was violet-ish in color and looked like a cross between a unicorn and an elephant tusk. It had six indigo eyes in its gall bladder. "Melironi proogotibyb unumoob, lagukum ca pachooba, kypykyg fiplic," the creature said.
"Ha," Kitten said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Stack spider web woodworker's clamp foil whisk crouch to oasis," the thing blubbered.
"Voilà. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Gatygoka African violet grolypylil."
"Why don't you take your African violet and shove it in your elbow?" Kitten retorted.
The creature looked self-confident. "Penugoboo trocopipook etecac, kuzakyb," it gasped. "Jogrocib!" it continued.
"Your face is a jogrocib!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, weird creature; she was feeling unusually brash. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or petroleum engineer. If she had been carrying a billy club, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Bransen will be delighted to see you."
The creature dashed slightly and treaded water. Then it rose up on its damaged legs, puffed out its wrist and bolted caustically toward her.
For the first time, Kitten had the urge to run, but her toenail was getting moist and her legs refused to move.
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