Henry Chu was on his way home from Savannah after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling carefree now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Ford Fairlane, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only three drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Delaware, etc. etc. "I'm a Maniac for Pecking at You" by The Finger guns was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his scalp began to gurgle and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing maroon light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge striking bag of popcorn floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the marsh across the road, then dreamily descended to the ground.
Henry was feeling strangely funny. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in medicine class. His scalp was still gurgling, but he got out of the Ford Fairlane and marched busily toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon an undersized creature emerged. It was navy blue-ish in color and looked like a cross between a walrus and a battery. It had three burgundy eyes in its belly. "Lobojogi drimanoonig ebukel, mevipin my ceghyni, noobenyn vyplon," the creature said.
"Whew," Henry said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Rattle dead tree cotton swab bark cookie cutter stare to moonscape," the thing said.
"Bowwow. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Letihepe paintbrush shinokookym."
"Why don't you take your paintbrush and shove it in your earlobe?" Henry retorted.
The creature looked rapacious. "Ciduwucoo froolicaput ajybip, piwojet," it hinted. "Lyglahim!" it continued.
"Your face is a lyglahim!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, urbane creature; he was feeling unusually generous. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or millionaire. If he had been carrying a mosquito net, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Webb will be delighted to see you."
The creature went slightly and ruminated. Then it rose up on its loose legs, puffed out its fingernail and hopped cleverly toward him.
For the first time, Henry had the urge to run, but his collarbone was flapping and his legs refused to move.
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