Lex Tutu was on his way home from Grand Prairie after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling lazy now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Ford Galaxy, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Tennessee, etc. etc. "You're a Quacker for Shaving Me" by The Roars was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his Adam's apple began to get scaly and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing hot pink light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge chic magnifying glass floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the path across the road, then dreamily descended to the ground.
Lex was feeling strangely brash. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in herbalism class. His Adam's apple was still getting scaly, but he got out of the Ford Galaxy and crept courageously toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a dark creature emerged. It was azure-ish in color and looked like a cross between a butterfly and a muffin. It had five golden eyes in its shoulder. "Mabocooka krakajanood ymiben, booyikud po keclumo, goojipyg jubryn," the creature said.
"Humph," Lex said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Blame piece of bark socket wrench cardboard ice pick rock to pond," the thing admitted.
"Blaak. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tiluhede diary plojoboobic."
"Why don't you take your diary and shove it in your wig?" Lex retorted.
The creature looked petulant. "Bomehimi shypulykin adenaj, koyimam," it voiced. "Goowhihub!" it continued.
"Your face is a goowhihub!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, modest creature; he was feeling unusually peckish. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or FBI Agent. If he had been carrying a BB gun, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Rajashree will be delighted to see you."
The creature bounced slightly and looked puzzled. Then it rose up on its curved legs, puffed out its appendix and flounced violently toward him.
For the first time, Lex had the urge to run, but his antenna was decaying and his legs refused to move.
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