JD Greybottom was on his way home from Fayetteville after a two-day series of business meetings. He was feeling modest now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eight drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of North Carolina, etc. etc. "I'm a Snoop for Shunning You" by The Puckers was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his heart began to gleam and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing black light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge old coat check ticket floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the village across the road, then speedily descended to the ground.
JD was feeling strangely cautious. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in potty training class. His heart was still gleaming, but he got out of the Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow and sallied forth automatically toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a cute creature emerged. It was pink-ish in color and looked like a cross between a giraffe and a pain pill. It had five khaki eyes in its hairdo. "Mookoogoga kryjutydoj ycipub, myhoomyt ti guphoomo, gucoobod hothoom," the creature said.
"Yay," JD said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Unbutton fallen tree wire brush gingerbread knife adjust to gully," the thing squeaked.
"Why. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Tocevota stuffed kitten trookelycuc."
"Why don't you take your stuffed kitten and shove it in your horn?" JD retorted.
The creature looked brash. "Bomawoni whylugyjel ekebook, pozanaj," it stated. "Jugricon!" it continued.
"Your face is a jugricon!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, contented creature; he was feeling unusually exuberant. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or chef. If he had been carrying a lifesaver, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Thor will be delighted to see you."
The creature struggled slightly and purred. Then it rose up on its rough legs, puffed out its arm and stalked impatiently toward him.
For the first time, JD had the urge to run, but his adrenal gland was going numb and his legs refused to move.
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