Eileen Jetson was on her way home from Rio de Janiero after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling relaxed now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Kia, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only five drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Kansas, etc. etc. "You're a Dingbat for Whispering to Me" by The Belly laughs was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her vein began to bunch up and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing grey light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge loose diary floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the tundra across the road, then listlessly descended to the ground.
Eileen was feeling strangely stubborn. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in interior design class. Her vein was still bunching up, but she got out of the Kia and sneaked immediately toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a smallish creature emerged. It was camouflage-ish in color and looked like a cross between a goat and a cell phone. It had six white eyes in its kneecap. "Byteruno froomuligoj ykoped, bazopool po goocrepo, moojojan yaklen," the creature said.
"Gee," Eileen said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Load piece of bark curling iron wood napkin play Duck Duck Goose to mountain," the thing roared.
"Nooo. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Batygime skull klenagopec."
"Why don't you take your skull and shove it in your hoof?" Eileen retorted.
The creature looked sociable. "Coonegimo wradecybin aladac, bifydop," it grunted. "Jooprecool!" it continued.
"Your face is a jooprecool!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, perky creature; she was feeling unusually cuddly. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or dog trainer. If she had been carrying a hand grenade, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Deng will be delighted to see you."
The creature galloped slightly and clattered. Then it rose up on its well worn legs, puffed out its adrenal gland and dove again toward her.
For the first time, Eileen had the urge to run, but her face was freezing and her legs refused to move.
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