Kyle Hillman was on his way home from Denver after a four-day series of business meetings. He was feeling hysterical now that the meetings were over. He was driving his perambulator, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only two drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Colorado, etc. etc. "I'm a Chump for Confusing You" by The Gasps was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his cheek began to unravel and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing aqua light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge bent pot floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the cliff across the road, then hastily descended to the ground.
Kyle was feeling strangely relaxed. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in physics class. His cheek was still unraveling, but he got out of the perambulator and tore roughly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a beautiful creature emerged. It was rose-ish in color and looked like a cross between a warthog and an apple. It had seven burgundy eyes in its toe. "Dumifame shalukikec oonijib, nawycel ba moophabe, ketipoot focloj," the creature said.
"Praise the Lord," Kyle said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Shred poison ivy plant chainsaw cork Sham-Wow! wince to swamp," the thing peeped.
"Yowsers. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Nocuvoopoo Frisbee thatacoonyj."
"Why don't you take your Frisbee and shove it in your earlobe?" Kyle retorted.
The creature looked boring. "Mebogete froocilabut ulocel, jihocoom," it reasoned. "Geshorim!" it continued.
"Your face is a geshorim!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, dark creature; he was feeling unusually woozy. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or lawyer. If he had been carrying a Taser, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Pike will be delighted to see you."
The creature ran slightly and snickered. Then it rose up on its miniature legs, puffed out its little finger and sashayed anxiously toward him.
For the first time, Kyle had the urge to run, but his eye was enlarging and his legs refused to move.
Next Chapter