Sadie Knopf was on her way home from Little Big Horn after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling stubborn now that the meetings were over. She was driving her cement truck, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eight drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of North Dakota, etc. etc. "You're an Ignoramous for Frightening Me" by The Air kisses was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her spinal cord began to go wild and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing peach light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge polished towel floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the savanna across the road, then promptly descended to the ground.
Sadie was feeling strangely sarcastic. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in etiquette class. Her spinal cord was still going wild, but she got out of the cement truck and bounded hastily toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a scruffy creature emerged. It was hot pink-ish in color and looked like a cross between a banana slug and a joint. It had three pea green eyes in its ankle. "Joocyyena crigoogebin apitec, josynun cy mughaku, goojanab fuprul," the creature said.
"Sieg Heil," Sadie said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Wiggle bit of moss whisk broom spandex chopstick play Duck Duck Goose to moonscape," the thing argued.
"Cripes. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Gekefuga telephone wrenolojit."
"Why don't you take your telephone and shove it in your mouth?" Sadie retorted.
The creature looked haughty. "Bapeyemu cloobegoopoc akonuj, civokuc," it stammered. "Coogragug!" it continued.
"Your face is a coogragug!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, mournful creature; she was feeling unusually pensive. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or escort. If she had been carrying a dart gun, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Ullman will be delighted to see you."
The creature rolled slightly and blew up. Then it rose up on its ruined legs, puffed out its chin and capered grudgingly toward her.
For the first time, Sadie had the urge to run, but her bicep was creaking and her legs refused to move.
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