Rock Prince was on his way home from Clodville after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling daring now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Mazda 6, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only nine drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Tennessee, etc. etc. "You're a Maniac for Dreaming about Me" by The Grimaces was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his thorax began to fester and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing periwinkle light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge funny pumpkin floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the lakeside across the road, then like a streak descended to the ground.
Rock was feeling strangely somber. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in geography class. His thorax was still festering, but he got out of the Mazda 6 and slithered daintily toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a muscular creature emerged. It was grey-ish in color and looked like a cross between a hog and a towel. It had two red eyes in its toe. "Tigajita grigudepeg ecepooc, pewakyn po bowhooku, jootacak juklooc," the creature said.
"Bravo," Rock said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Grasp maple tree roll of duct tape cards mixing spoon slobber to park," the thing rationalized.
"I don't think so. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Pogocujy blanket ghajylotun."
"Why don't you take your blanket and shove it in your calf?" Rock retorted.
The creature looked idiotic. "Mykufocu klycoomegyk ekylon, beweboob," it orated. "Lothyyoog!" it continued.
"Your face is a lothyyoog!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, dependable creature; he was feeling unusually relaxed. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or real estate investor. If he had been carrying a candlestick, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Gotti will be delighted to see you."
The creature galloped slightly and dressed up. Then it rose up on its musty legs, puffed out its waist and hopped menacingly toward him.
For the first time, Rock had the urge to run, but his elbow was opening up and his legs refused to move.
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