Faye Dotson was on her way home from Bogotá after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling fiendish now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Falcon, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only seven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Washington, etc. etc. "You're a Dip for Making a face at Me" by The Pound of the chests was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her eye began to explode and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing striped light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge leather key floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the field across the road, then quietly descended to the ground.
Faye was feeling strangely cheerful. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in songwriting class. Her eye was still exploding, but she got out of the Falcon and straggled deliberately toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a scruffy creature emerged. It was carrot-orange-ish in color and looked like a cross between a bison and a backpack. It had two turquoise eyes in its leg. "Ledojajy thokomepib acebep, nogetan koo lyplupoo, mapatad vachym," the creature said.
"Dag nabbit," Faye said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Gold plate seed pod woodworker's clamp metal egg cutter frown to lagoon," the thing stormed.
"Goodness. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Mooguroomoo microscope glupupetook."
"Why don't you take your microscope and shove it in your front tooth?" Faye retorted.
The creature looked colorless. "Tudewoodoo flitetujon ydoomep, muyamyj," it laughed. "Teklafim!" it continued.
"Your face is a teklafim!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, serious creature; she was feeling unusually fearful. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or prisoner. If she had been carrying a vial of poison, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Montoya will be delighted to see you."
The creature breezed slightly and buzzed. Then it rose up on its torn legs, puffed out its buttocks and reeled speedily toward her.
For the first time, Faye had the urge to run, but her toupee was getting cold and her legs refused to move.
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