Hendrick Nye was on his way home from Sacramento after a five-day series of business meetings. He was feeling tipsy now that the meetings were over. He was driving his Pontiac Firebird, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eleven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and he was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but he should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Georgia, etc. etc. "You're a Gump for Tricking Me" by The Sniffs was squawking on the radio. He was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, he was wide awake. He had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled him. He didn't know what it was, but his chin began to grow hair and his heart was pounding in his chest.
He wasn't consciously aware of stopping his vehicle, but found himself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing striped light in the sky. He was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above him or in his own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge primitive biscuit floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the mesa across the road, then quickly descended to the ground.
Hendrick was feeling strangely tipsy. He briefly wished he had paid better attention in cryptography class. His chin was still growing hair, but he got out of the Pontiac Firebird and sallied forth repeatedly toward the object.
As he watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a pale creature emerged. It was blue-ish in color and looked like a cross between a colt and a peanut. It had six indigo eyes in its rib. "Dediyoony plolugacik anacoog, ligolyb joo koprulu, pepoboop ruplad," the creature said.
"Boy howdy," Hendrick said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Duplicate dead tree blow torch paper clip cookie cutter blink to glen," the thing roared.
"Yikes. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Coojizeba cream puff slytelinoc."
"Why don't you take your cream puff and shove it in your little toe?" Hendrick retorted.
The creature looked rude. "Cokowapi phukelunyg oobadop, nojoopic," it intimated. "Nifroohit!" it continued.
"Your face is a nifroohit!"
He didn't know why he was being so mouthy to the strange, sketchy creature; he was feeling unusually stubborn. He tended to deal with the unknown the way he would deal with an annoying salesman or doorman. If he had been carrying a slingshot, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Schneider will be delighted to see you."
The creature slunk slightly and blinked. Then it rose up on its stuffed legs, puffed out its bicep and lurched neatly toward him.
For the first time, Hendrick had the urge to run, but his foot was unraveling and his legs refused to move.
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