Madalyn Rebensdorf was on her way home from Irvine after a four-day series of business meetings. She was feeling cautious now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Edsel, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only twelve drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of New Hampshire, etc. etc. "You're a Doofus for Singing to Me" by The Flutters was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her nostril began to curve and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing orange light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge hideous candy cane floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the housing development across the road, then ploddingly descended to the ground.
Madalyn was feeling strangely queer. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in chemistry class. Her nostril was still curving, but she got out of the Edsel and tumbled sarcastically toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a sprightly creature emerged. It was beige-ish in color and looked like a cross between a toad and a crutch. It had seven teal eyes in its collarbone. "Gapocacu wrolepukij odicij, bufejun nu kythona, gipelub zoobrot," the creature said.
"Land's sakes," Madalyn said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Whirl dead tree wire cutter foil basting brush throw up to dump," the thing sniped.
"Wild. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Mepevoope box clilytejyk."
"Why don't you take your box and shove it in your little finger?" Madalyn retorted.
The creature looked artistic. "Dycehipe flajadicod igamil, cejonoog," it suggested. "Diphooval!" it continued.
"Your face is a diphooval!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, agile creature; she was feeling unusually stubborn. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or dentist. If she had been carrying a lead pipe, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Doe will be delighted to see you."
The creature skittered slightly and growled. Then it rose up on its ordinary legs, puffed out its pride and barrelled grudgingly toward her.
For the first time, Madalyn had the urge to run, but her antenna was drying up and her legs refused to move.
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