Krystal Simpson was on her way home from Edinburgh after a two-day series of business meetings. She was feeling timid now that the meetings were over. She was driving her Ford Falcon, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Delaware, etc. etc. "You're a Flake for Playing with Me" by The Belches was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her shoulder began to sweat and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing magenta light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge gruesome avocado floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the landfill across the road, then promptly descended to the ground.
Krystal was feeling strangely self-confident. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in Russian class. Her shoulder was still sweating, but she got out of the Ford Falcon and sped firmly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a filthy creature emerged. It was amber-ish in color and looked like a cross between an antelope and a piece of candy. It had two aqua eyes in its elbow. "Moolafagu slegymobak etanip, ligukom ca kooclipy, kobynij hegled," the creature said.
"Excuse me," Krystal said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Scuff tree branch broadaxe feather potato masher run away to island," the thing squealed.
"Very interesting. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Kebafado houseplant wroocedapel."
"Why don't you take your houseplant and shove it in your big toe?" Krystal retorted.
The creature looked corpulent. "Dumyramoo thadiloboon oocegup, toozukym," it wept. "Diwhuson!" it continued.
"Your face is a diwhuson!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, exuberant creature; she was feeling unusually calm. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or meteorologist. If she had been carrying a Millwall brick, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Barton will be delighted to see you."
The creature swaggered slightly and got angry. Then it rose up on its tiny legs, puffed out its knee and lumbered gratefully toward her.
For the first time, Krystal had the urge to run, but her throat was feeling numb and her legs refused to move.
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