Vanessa Rossi was on her way home from Oklahoma City after a five-day series of business meetings. She was feeling cautious now that the meetings were over. She was driving her fire engine, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only six drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Louisiana, etc. etc. "You're a Poopyhead for Educating Me" by The Flutters was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her back began to perk up and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing periwinkle light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge used hat floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the grassy knoll across the road, then nimbly descended to the ground.
Vanessa was feeling strangely calm. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in photography class. Her back was still perking up, but she got out of the fire engine and tiptoed strictly toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a gaunt creature emerged. It was magenta-ish in color and looked like a cross between a sloth and a toilet plunger. It had five white eyes in its hip. "Tyceryloo chydikitum oocyjum, basijun ti cythupu, jolibol zooglook," the creature said.
"Whee," Vanessa said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Prepare raspberry bush scrub brush tile strainer pray to outback," the thing bawled.
"Shoo. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Gopywacy bird cage cludajukic."
"Why don't you take your bird cage and shove it in your funny bone?" Vanessa retorted.
The creature looked unselfish. "Podufago grabubijyd yjobaj, lusynit," it asserted. "Ticloosoop!" it continued.
"Your face is a ticloosoop!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, bouncy creature; she was feeling unusually peckish. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or drummer. If she had been carrying a wet washrag, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Easton will be delighted to see you."
The creature slipped slightly and grew up. Then it rose up on its valuable legs, puffed out its belly and dashed excitedly toward her.
For the first time, Vanessa had the urge to run, but her tummy was shrinking and her legs refused to move.
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