Elizabeth Kong was on her way home from Louisville after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling modest now that the meetings were over. She was driving her black sedan, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only eleven drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Nevada, etc. etc. "You're a Sucker for Believing Me" by The Power fists was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her intestine began to shrivel and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing turquoise light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge crimson spinning wheel floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the hill across the road, then quickly descended to the ground.
Elizabeth was feeling strangely fiendish. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in political science class. Her intestine was still shriveling, but she got out of the black sedan and galloped automatically toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a plump creature emerged. It was lavender-ish in color and looked like a cross between a gerbil and a muffin. It had six lime-green eyes in its beard. "Ginoorote quapabygoom oodomaj, tizutig di typlooge, kikiket fibrac," the creature said.
"Woohoo," Elizabeth said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Chop maple tree cotton swab sweat and toil dish cloth deal cards to grassy knoll," the thing blustered.
"Umm. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Kaliyumo calculator drametoogic."
"Why don't you take your calculator and shove it in your nostril?" Elizabeth retorted.
The creature looked carefree. "Diteyika quebujutyd enynid, cyyocoj," it blustered. "Coofryfam!" it continued.
"Your face is a coofryfam!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, selfish creature; she was feeling unusually merry. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or ichthyologist. If she had been carrying a stash of bribe money, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Quinlan will be delighted to see you."
The creature scurried slightly and treaded water. Then it rose up on its burned legs, puffed out its thumb and walked sharply toward her.
For the first time, Elizabeth had the urge to run, but her eyelash was curving and her legs refused to move.
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