Liz Tillerman was on her way home from Singapore after a three-day series of business meetings. She was feeling fearful now that the meetings were over. She was driving her dump truck, and was starting to get a bit drowsy, in spite of having had only four drinks with dinner. The drone of the engine and tires was taking its toll, and she was having that familiar internal discussion about just having an hour more of driving, but she should really stop and rest, but it's not really safe to stop alongside the road in this remote part of Maine, etc. etc. "I'm a Snoop for Burying You" by The Snickers was squawking on the radio. She was too tired to search for something better.
Suddenly, she was wide awake. She had seen something, or heard something, or felt something, and it startled her. She didn't know what it was, but her spine began to blanch and her heart was pounding in her chest.
She wasn't consciously aware of stopping her vehicle, but found herself parked on the shoulder of the road, staring at a bright pulsing mauve light in the sky. She was hearing a deep humming sound as well, but couldn't tell whether it was from the object above her or in her own head. The radio for some reason was silent. The light grew larger as it approached, and it began to take on a shape, sort of like a huge damp contract floating in the air. It hovered for a while over the park across the road, then moderately descended to the ground.
Liz was feeling strangely queer. She briefly wished she had paid better attention in grassland management class. Her spine was still blanching, but she got out of the dump truck and sallied forth majestically toward the object.
As she watched, an opening appeared in the side of the ship, and soon a scraggly creature emerged. It was violet-ish in color and looked like a cross between a porcupine and a hockey puck. It had eight scarlet eyes in its waist. "Cagasojo phoonogobik ipacel, boowoodop li doquamy, kidygoot zechuc," the creature said.
"By all the saints," Liz said. "Care to repeat that in English?"
"Unbutton acorn protractor fiber pair of chopsticks squint to river," the thing asserted.
"Doubtful. You can go back to your native language now. While you're at it, maybe you should go back to your native planet."
"Kynoofibe pacifier quobonicap."
"Why don't you take your pacifier and shove it in your tail?" Liz retorted.
The creature looked calm. "Nybeveke phinokokij oocodoc, lyfycuj," it tittered. "Boothihook!" it continued.
"Your face is a boothihook!"
She didn't know why she was being so mouthy to the strange, choleric creature; she was feeling unusually exuberant. She tended to deal with the unknown the way she would deal with an annoying salesman or journalist. If she had been carrying a tennis racket, the conversation might have taken a very different turn.
"So, what are you here for? I suppose you want me to take you to my leader. I'm sure President Gagné will be delighted to see you."
The creature traipsed slightly and meditated. Then it rose up on its broken legs, puffed out its belly button and galumphed happily toward her.
For the first time, Liz had the urge to run, but her tail was drying up and her legs refused to move.
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