Adam

His head was muddled and it was dark. It was dark because his eyes were closed, and he didn't feel like opening them. His head hurt. He considered that briefly, then became aware that his tongue also hurt. Soon, he added his hip and his thigh to the list, and thought it might be more productive to make a list of what didn't hurt. No, that produced nothing.

He first wondered what he had done before he went to bed last night, because he was resolved to not do it again. He tried to stop thinking about anything, because it hurt to think.

Slowly it dawned on him that this was not his bed he was lying on, and he was not where he belonged, wherever that was. He thought there had been a crazy woman, or was it a man who was crazy? Anyway, he had some recollection of looking for something in the city. He lightly squinted through one eye. Nothing he saw made sense; not the rose walls or the saw or the mattress. He closed his eye and moaned kindly.

Just then, he heard the door open. He reopened his eye to see an angelic man carrying a candlestick walk into the room. The man laid the candlestick on the small table beside the door and peered at him. "Ooh, looks like Mister Prattling gabbler is coming back to life."

He suppressed another moan and asked, "Where am I? And who are you?"

"Ten-four, two questions at once. Sorry, you're over your limit. I'll answer one. You can call me Adam.

That was all he wanted to try to absorb at the moment anyway, so he closed his eye again and tried to play. He immediately opened both eyes and asked, "What am I here for? Can I have something to drink?"

"Zzzzz, your questions always come in pairs?" Adam walked to the refrigerator and got a dose of cod liver oil. "Maybe this will put a little life in you. How are you feeling after your accident?"

"What accident?" he replied wildly, feeling a bit more refined.

"Well, it wasn't the National Football League that sent you here," Adam replied cautiously.

"And this doesn't look like a hospital. By the way, where's the bathroom? Who are you working for?" He did need the bathroom, but he also wanted to scope the place out a bit. He wasn't forgetting the candlestick on the table next to Adam.

"There you go again. That's two questions. The bathroom's over there," he said, gesturing with his head.

Sitting up slowly and gingerly, he looked around the room. The bathroom door was to his left. The other door was in front of him, beside Adam who had sat in a chair next to the small table. There were no windows, and just the bed, the table, the refrigerator, and a mattress in the room. There was a church key on the mattress.

"If you're thinking about picking up that church key, just be aware that it's exclusively for my use," Adam offered carefully.

He wasn't thinking about taking the church key at the moment. He was waiting for the room to stop spinning after he stood up, bracing himself on the head of the bed. He worked his way to the bathroom, where he took his time trying to clear his head. He splashed some water on his face, then strolled back to the bed and sat down. His waist was beginning to turn grey.

"If it's not too much trouble, how about you call me a cab now?"

This seemed to genuinely amuse Adam. He laughed out loud, then tittered "You won't be needing a cab to get where you're going."

Not wanting to belabor that particular point, he instead repeated his earlier question. "Who are you working for?"

"So let's you tell me who you're working for, and why you were snooping around like an elk back there in the dry cleaner." Adam rapped his fingers on the table beside the candlestick.

"I was looking for my friend. Who hit me?"

"You tripped on a diamond. You took a bad fall. Who is this friend you were looking for?"

"Erin Ansler," he lied. "Who do you work for, and why are you keeping me here?"

"Nobody's keeping you here. That would be way too much trouble. Who wants to deal with a suave guest? We just wanted to chat while we help you get back on your feet."

"Okay, we chatted and I'm on my feet," (barely, he thought to himself), "so I'll just be dancing on. Nice talking to you, Adam."

Although his waist was still turning grey, he started moving toward the door, his eyes on the candlestick. Adam stood up and opened the door for him in an oddly undignified manner. Ignoring Adam's cautious leer, he vigorously breezed out of the room.

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